Torn on whether to rehome my cat :(

[Iwantsunshine]

I have multiple cats, one has ongoing long term health issues for which he is currently receiving specialist treatment (all covered by our insurance). He is very young and we’ve had him from a kitten.

I have another cat, again had from a kitten, he’s sick nearly all the time - sometimes multiple times a day, he also seems stressed as bites his fur out and scratches our carpets to pieces, we’ve tried feliway and we’ve taken him to the vets on multiple occasions, they’ve never been able to diagnose anything.

we’ve most recently taken him a few weeks ago because we can’t keep cleaning up the sick (he seems fine, not distressed by it and carries on as normal after the episode of sick) and the vet is now saying it’s his teeth and it’s likely going to cost us over £1,000 to get them sorted as he will need 2 lots of treatment as they are so severe. We can’t claim for this on insurance, we’re also not convinced it’s his teeth - yes they are bad but the sickness I believe is related to something else - problem is unless we get the treatment for his teeth we won’t be covered for anything relating to his sickness if we claim again in the future as vet is putting it down as dental issues.

if I am honest, we have a young child too and just can not afford to pay for my cat to have the dental treatment and not to mention he’s not getting the love and attention he needs because we just don’t have time to fuss him all day (he’s a real lap cat). I thibk the fur pulling is to do with stress of a multi cat household and a young loud child at home too.

we have considered rehoming (through a charity) because with 2 sick cats (I actually have 3) and a baby it’s a lot on my mental health, we mentioned this to a family member who basically implied we are evil for considering rehoming him and that this is what we signed up for when we got a cat.

i just want what is best for him and due to our finances we are depriving him of treatment the vet feels he needs right now.

what would you do in my position? Any advice gratefully received.

You can put the vet bills on a credit card or ask for a payment plan. Are either of those an option for you?

I don't think anyone here has flamed you - they're just giving you advice - and it's good advice too.

Ultimately it's your decision but personally speaking I couldn't forgive myself if I hadn't tried absolutely everything before rehoming, and yes, that includes spending 2k on dental surgery.

But that's me and I'm not you and I'm not living your life. If you're unhappy then by all means look for a new home for him. Just be honest with the charity you choose about his health so they can make the right decision for him going forward.

@BungleandGeorge I haven’t asked people to say it’s ok!

i can not be the only person in the UK who is struggling financially at the moment so please don’t make me feel bad about it!

@sunsetsandsandybeaches I can’t put on a credit card but yes I could ask my vet for a payment plan. It’s something I can look into and discuss with them.

to be fair lots of people rehome their pets, for worse reasons than I would be rehoming my cat, as I mentioned I have 2 friends who have rehomed pets before the birth of their babies - now that’s not on! Ive not done this, we’ve coped for 2 years and have taken him to vets for his issues - we’ve tried steroids and also foods suggested but it’s now come down to the vet suggesting teeth.

also of course I would be honest - I have never made any indication in my posts that I would consider being disloyal!

It breaks my heart that I’ve posted this and also that we are even considering it.

Sorry ** dishonest - I haven’t suggested being dishonest with any charities

And yet you're willing to burden them with more vet bills?

I understand that.

Unfortunately the reality is that many charities will struggle to cover the costs of dental surgery and may struggle even more to re-home a cat with health conditions, which is why posters are encouraging you to try and sort the health issues first if you possibly can - to ensure your cat has the absolute best chance going forward.

@Chikapu I’m not ‘willing’ I’m considering it because what else can I do when I can’t afford to pay for it for myself, should I leave him as others have said that is cruel..

if you can think of any helpful suggestions I would love to here from you, otherwise stop trying to make me out to be a bad person for trying to do the right thing for my pet.

Are you perhaps eligible for some help from the PDSA? PDSA eligibility. Talk to your vet about a payment plan.
Animal charities regularly ask for help with paying vet bills, many are in a lot of debt and adding to their burden is wrong. I'm sorry that you think that's harsh but it is the truth.

Sadly we are not on benefits but with the cost of living and funding childcare we don’t have that amount of money to pay outright.

my next option will be to speak to our vet and see if they can offer us a payment plan, I’m hopeful given our history and the fact we have another cat receiving regular treatment via them they will allow us to pay back monthly.

You could ring multiple vets for prices and payment terms. I guess your other option is to consider euthenasia

@Iwantsunshine

If you really can’t afford it please don’t be guilted by people on this. Do what’s best for you and your family and also your cat in the long term.

Unless the people trying to guilt you into getting into debt, are willing to cough up then it’s all your problem not theirs.

@BungleandGeorge I will not consider euthanasia, he is only 6 years old so that’s no an option for us.

@Tillsforthrills thank you. I do feel guilty and the majority of responses have made me feel even more guilty about the situation.
I genuinely thought that I was being ‘kind’ by considering giving him up because the alternative is to see him unhappy and suffering but it seems he will have to wait until we can afford the bill before he can have treatment, to save the rescues anymore unnecessary costs.

We did all the right things by getting him insured but sadly it doesn’t cover any dental issues, I guess that’s the same for all cat owners.

with a young family and the cost of living crisis, it would be also irresponsible to go into debt of thousands of pounds. For many families, this would be a sizeable debt which could have a knock on effect.

Agree with other posters - please do not get a replacement. With three cats already, can tell you’re a softy for them.

For future reference (or for other owners reading this) there are insurance companies that cover dental (Tesco is one) with the caveat that your pet must attend annual check ups which include dental checks.

The logic being that most dental problems are fixable if spotted early enough. Unfortunately (and this isn't a criticism as I never bothered in the past either) many owners don't bother with check ups and so they're caught out when they realise insurance won't pay.

@Kenwouldmixitup I definitely would not get another cat/pet. I have enough going on with one of my other cats, constant 4 hour round trips, plus working and a toddler - just too much for me to handle as it is.

agreed, it’s irresponsible to get myself into debt too, this is what I was trying to avoid but the general consensus of posters on my thread would obviously get themselves into debt if they were in my position….

I second what @sunsetsandsandybeaches says re dentals. I wish I had known this, we didn’t ever have annual checks and this is why my insurance (petplan) won’t cover. We pay for the highest level and their ‘covered for life’ policy too - more fool us!

so please learn from my terrible mistake 😕

”general consensus of posters on my thread would obviously get themselves into debt if they were in my position….”

I doubt it.

@Kenwouldmixitup lol my thoughts exactly…

Actually, I have gone into debt to save my cats in the past. I inherited two cats from an ex-flatmate - he said he'd pay the insurance, he didn't, and I got stuck with the bill.

But, it was slightly more urgent in that it was either pay the money for surgery or they would die, so it's not quite the same scenario, but I would do it again in a heartbeat if I had to.