So firstly, I'm a cat lover, always have been and I've had cats for all of my 35 years. We got our cat exactly 2 years ago from a rescue centre. As it was lockdown, we were matched to her so didn't actually meet her before collection. But that was fine as we specifically asked for a cat that would be suitable with a toddler and she definitely was. When we got her, she'd been abandoned and found near some shops. Plus, she'd just had a litter of kittens (possibly her second litter). So she was spayed just before she came home with us.
She settled fine at our house. Accepted our toddling ds, was relaxed and although she could be a little bit fiesty with her play, no problems. Then last summer I had dd and again, she was fine with a new baby. But then a few months after that, we moved house and I think this is where her behaviour started to become erratic.
So in the last 8 months since we moved, our cat has had issues with going to the toilet. Never had this at the other house. At night, we keep her in and she goes in the utility room. I know she doesn't love it in their but she is safe at least. She has a litter tray normally, just in case. But I've had to clear up poo, wee, mountains of hair, blood from where she's been scratching, etc so often that's been left all over the room. I don't know why she's doing it. She can't be left to just roam around the house as I think she'd wake up ds and dd as she's got a loud meow. Plus, I don't want to risk her pooing or weeing elsewhere in the house overnight. I could leave her outside in the shed maybe with a cat flap but she hates the cold so that's only practical for the summer really.
She's a sweet cat and loves a fuss. We've always joked that she's not the sharpest tool in the box lol as she does such silly, clumsy things and often looks a bit blank lol
The other odd thing she started doing when we moved is just pooing in the grass. I've never known a cat to do that! So obviously with ds and dd, that's a problem outside as we're always on a poo hunt before we let them in the garden. I've also noticed that she doesn't wash herself after doing a poo either. I don't know if it's laziness but she often doesn't look clean and last night just topped the lot!... So the storm started, I let her in last night and noticed she was covered in poo, down her back, legs, sides. I don't know if the storm had scared her or what but it was everywhere. So there I was cleaning her and everywhere she'd walked on her way in.
Now I know when you take a pet on, you take them on whatever challenges it may bring but I'm struggling with this and I don't know what to do? I'm getting really anxious about ds and dd touching her mess and getting ill even though we're doing our absolute best to keep on top of it. Every so often, she jumps on the kitchen table and units and this makes me anxious as she's so messy. I always clap my hands or something to get her down straight away.
I would hate to have to rehome her over this and that really would be an absolute last resort but I'm just finding the constant mess and erratic bahaviour really difficult and stressful. She's so tolerant and good with our dc and they love her. We all do but I'm so scared about her behaviour becoming a health risk.
Please help and advise?
P. S. She's only about 3/4 so not an old cat. No known health conditions. Fully vaccinated, etc.