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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

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Original poster

To get another cat or keep at 1?

25 replies

Spiider · 13/05/2022 19:44

So around 4 months ago we adopted 2 cats from a local rescue. A female who was 3 and a male that was 1.5. We don’t know the relationship between them but they were bonded prior to being in rescue and came from a home. Sadly the male passed away quite quickly of an illness just over a month ago.

The female cat has seemed ok since the loss, however is quite clingy which is fine and demands a lot of attention. I guess what I am wondering is is it fair to keep her on her own or should we be looking to adopt another cat? We have 2 children who the current cat is perfect with so would hate to unbalance that. Part of me worries as they used to sleep together etc that she may be missing the company. Any advice would be good. (We have no preference either way just want to do that is best)

OP posts:

Beamur · 13/05/2022 19:57

Get a boy kitten.

Original poster

Spiider · 13/05/2022 20:00

Thanks. That was kind of what I saw online that a male kitten may be a good idea.

OP posts:

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 13/05/2022 20:02

We had 2 brothers. 1 died. Lone db was depressed..
She cheered him up.

Beamur · 13/05/2022 20:04

Boys are (usually) more chilled and easier to introduce to a resident female cat.
Your girl is still very young and might miss the company of her pal.

SheWoreYellow · 13/05/2022 20:04

I think that cats tend to hate each other unless they’re siblings? I thought they were solitary creatures. Obviously there are exceptions, but I’d be wary of just adding stress to her.

Original poster

Spiider · 13/05/2022 20:11

Awww thanks for the cat pictures @Summerholidayorcovidagain your two look so happy. That’s exactly what ours used to me like. She used to enjoy playing, now she just cuddly. (Which is nice, but is she happy?)

@Beamur thanks for your advice. I agree she’s still so young and I would hate to think she misses another cat to play with.

@SheWoreYellow Thats kind of why I’m asking here. These are/were our first cats so still learning a lot. I would hate to stress her out, but also don’t want her to be lonely. These 2 were very closely bonded but definitely not siblings. ? Mum and son ? Just put together. Who knows.

OP posts:

Beamur · 13/05/2022 20:15

It's a bit of a myth about all cats being solitary. Some are some aren't. They're able to form friendships or co-exist in the same space as long as they have enough resources, like litter trays, sleeping areas, etc.
It can ebb and flow too. My cats (3) have a truce of sorts between the sisters (2) and resident cat. They're not pals but don't fight. Sisters either love each other or fight...
My previous boy cat was an absolute sweetheart and got along with everyone.

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 13/05/2022 20:38

We got our dkitten from a local CPL fosterer. They covered neutering costs. Took a while for her to get to the required 2 kg though. Dcat was 8 when we got her. No regrets...

HMSSophia · 13/05/2022 20:42

I had an adult male rescue. Then I got him a girl kitten because he was so friendly and chirruping to the neighbour cats.

HMSSophia · 13/05/2022 20:43

So now I live with these two

Original poster

Spiider · 13/05/2022 20:47

@Summerholidayorcovidagain and @Beamur thanks for your experience. I would be happy with one cat, but I think from responses I’m feeling more and more that adopting another cat (probably a young male kitten or young cat) may be the way forward. We just want to make this work and for her to be happy. I guess it’s just company. We originally adopted these two as we are out of the house weekdays so wanted them to have company. Lots to think about. I will start looking at local rescues again.

OP posts:

Notdoingthis · 13/05/2022 20:55

It is interesting about them being solitary. We have siblings who like each other, but the boy cat has a best friend too, who calls for him in pur garden every day. They play, hunt, hang out.

Svara · 13/05/2022 21:11

Sorry for the loss of your young cat x

I'd look for a male kitten, six months (so can be left all day) or older or a one year old cat.

I have one and two year old boy cats, relationship unknown but bonded. I would get another if anything was to happen to either of them as they are cats that are used to being with other cats. They often sleep together and groom each other.

Original poster

Spiider · 13/05/2022 21:37

@HMSSophia thanks sharing your experience! I feel like our cat would love a friend so it’s nice to hear success stories.

@Notdoingthis i agree it’s interesting. I’ve read so much about them being solitary but also equal amounts suggesting that’s not necessarily the case.

@Svara Thankyou. We were gutted even though we had him such a small time. He fitted into our household so well and was the sweetest of cats. Yes that’s what I feel they always slept together and groomed each other, now she doesn’t have that. I have just emailed our local cats protection enquiring if they have any young males that they feel may be suitable. I will keep this threat updated.

OP posts:

Toddlerteaplease · 13/05/2022 23:36

My cat gets on far better with her adopted sister, than she did with her actual sister.

coffeecupsandfairylights · 14/05/2022 06:55

I really don't believe cats are solitary animals in the slightest.

I have three unrelated cats and would never go back to having a solo cat again!

Original poster

Spiider · 20/05/2022 19:49

Just thought I would update that our other cat sadly had to be put to sleep today of the same illness we are gutted… Thanks for everyone’s advice. We will be looking to rehome again and after advice from this thread will try and get 2 together.

OP posts:

Svara · 20/05/2022 20:45

I'm so sorry @Spiider, that's so sad 💐. We lost our little girl cat at just three, got our boys ten weeks later. It was bittersweet to see them in her favourite spots at first, but then we wouldn't have them if we hadn't lost her, and they are lovely cats.

Lavenderlast · 20/05/2022 20:54

My cats are siblings and they hate each other.

No way would I bring in a new cat. Cats prefer to live alone, it’s hard for humans to comprehend but they are not like us.

Svara · 20/05/2022 21:14

Cats prefer to live alone, it’s hard for humans to comprehend but they are not like us.
Some cats enjoy social interaction with other cats but to live alone, some cats do like the company of other cats. My cats often sleep together and groom each other, then other times one will be in one room and one in another. When I first let my two out, one disappeared and was found happily sitting with the neighbourhood tom (a cat that I avoid myself as he is usually unfriendly) in his front garden.

coffeecupsandfairylights · 20/05/2022 22:36

Lavenderlast · 20/05/2022 20:54

My cats are siblings and they hate each other.

No way would I bring in a new cat. Cats prefer to live alone, it’s hard for humans to comprehend but they are not like us.

This may be true for some cats, but many love company and are very happy living in multi/cat homes.

My three are unrelated and different ages and sexes - they never fight, love to play, wash each other, sleep curled up together, and share food, water and litter with zero problems whatsoever.

Fluffycloudland77 · 20/05/2022 22:38

That’s awful news, I’m sorry you lost them both.

Pudmyboy · 22/05/2022 14:25

Spiider · 20/05/2022 19:49

Oh how sad, I am so sorry, but I am glad you got to give them a loving home for their sadly short lives 💐

Finalcountdowntoourtripaway · 22/05/2022 14:27

Ah so sorry op...
Glad you are considering filling the dcat shaped hole.
Some lucky dcat's lives are about to change...

Original poster

Spiider · 22/05/2022 17:14

Thanks for the wishes @Finalcountdowntoourtripaway @Pudmyboy @Fluffycloudland77 @Svara I’m also glad they got to live out their last few months in a warm home with people that loved them. We were hoping we would have them for many years but obviously that wasn’t meant to be. I am on the look out for a bonded sibling set after all the advice on this thread so watch this space. I know some may say it’s soon to look but we only had them for 2 and then just over 3 months. We know we have everything ready and so seems a shame not to try and help another pair.

OP posts:

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