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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Which kitten? Help me decide!

84 replies

BeeKeeping · 03/04/2022 15:15

Please forgive this long and rambling question.. I just need to get my thoughts down on paper to help me decide!

Background - busy household with two young children, lots of rural outdoor space, chickens, bees yadda yadda yada. We recently lost our beloved big dog. She has left an enourmous void and I feel sick every time I walk through the door etc and she’s not there. I would love another dog, but the reality with two small kids is that I just wouldn’t have the time to exercise and train one properly. Old dog was immaculately behaved (after being a nightmare puppy, but we put the time and work in and it really paid off). I think getting another dog I would probably compair them, to the new dogs detriment.

I think the kids would love a rabbit or hamster etc but I hate animals in cages and really feel that pets should be free to roam and choose you. We have two cats, one 7yo outdoor mouser who is never in and one 17yo grumpy cat who isn’t into playing. I love the cats and how low maintenance they are, the kids love the cats but don’t get a lot from them. Both original cats are rescues but a rescue wouldn’t consider us till the kids are older.

I’d like a kitten who is actually a dog in a cats body, who would play and give cuddles but also go outside sometime to help to control the rodent population! There are a couple of folks on gumtree selling kittens for around the 250-300 mark. Which seems crazy but apparently is the going rate for kittens nowadays. Both ready in about a month, kittens all gorgous stripy grey floof balls from both households. Both have boys availible which is what I would prefer.

First option - kittens are quite far away, but drivable in a day there and back. Coming from a busy household with young kids, other cats and a dog. The guy who’s selling them claims that they’re bengal x. cross main coon cross. Does that make sense? Full bengal dad, main coon cross mum. I’m very sceptical of this given the price. If it were true I think that mix would be fantastic and lend itself to a ‘dog in a cats body’ bombproof kind of kitten. Downsides are that it may not be truthful and kittens may be aloof and frightened no matter what.

Second option - local kittens, slightly cheaper. Upfront about just a moggy mum and dad, accidental pregnancy now dad has been snipped etc. But….. Quiet household.

Do you think a quiet/noisy household pre 9 weeks matters? Which would you go for?

OP posts:
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tabulahrasa · 03/04/2022 19:54

Oh god, yeah it’s crossed with a Maine coon, where did I get rag doll from? Confused lol.

Tutt · 03/04/2022 19:57

My 2 were moggie/siamese, rescued at 2 years old.
Both had beautiful siamese face, she was tabby, he was ginger. Taught to fetch, sit (sort of) and were with DS and I constantly. They were his best buddies and were loved by all, even the ones who stated they hated cats! The times I was told they were like little dogs... they weren't they were just very people friendly.
Go for the moggie OP, they were 21 and 19 when I lost them and I miss them every day.

Saltyquiche · 03/04/2022 20:04

Noisy household lkitten.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 03/04/2022 23:17

Go for a moggy.

We have three black moggies and they're fantastic. All fine with children, all friendly and zero aggression from any of them.

Fluffycloudland77 · 04/04/2022 11:27

Our Bengal was a Jack Russell in a cat onesie. They are noisy buggers though. 45 minutes of shouty miaowing tries anyones patience it really does.

Fluffycloudland77 · 04/04/2022 11:30

Oh I’ve just read bombproof. Bengals can be highly strung, the owners have to be bombproof for them not the other way around.

Heronatemygoldfish · 04/04/2022 12:01

If you're having to pay deposits just to go and see them, then something's not right. A responsible place would want the kittens to go to suitable places and for them to meet potential owners first.

If you want to know what a cat is going to be like with kids and other cats, could you rehome a young adult?

We rehomed a kitten and his mum when my DS was 5. He is still the only person that the mum will allow to pick her up... and her joke name is the labrador. She eats anything and everything and comes running to whistles! mostly because she thinks she'll get food

Original poster
BeeKeeping · 04/04/2022 13:39

Thanks so much. I've definitely decided against the Bengal cross.

Called round a few more rescue places today and they would consider us for rescue but don't have any young cats or kittens at the moment. My ideal would be to rescue a pregnant mama and then keep her and one of the kittens, but it would have to be the right temperament of mama. The local rescue centers said they hardly ever get pregnant cats because people can make money from the kittens....

OP posts:
Easterbunnyiswindowshopping · 04/04/2022 16:55

Contact your local council.. They may know who organises the neutering of ferals...they do try and take any dkittens if they are weaned... Dd's were found living in a shop doorway. They were a bit skittish but soon settled in.

Which kitten? Help me decide!
Fluffycloudland77 · 04/04/2022 18:09

Mum cats don’t always get on well with adult kittens either, they like them out the door at 16weeks and aren’t afraid to say so.

You need a ginger Tom or Maybe a tabby. Definitely not torties.

DancingChairs · 04/04/2022 19:11

@Fluffycloudland77

Mum cats don’t always get on well with adult kittens either, they like them out the door at 16weeks and aren’t afraid to say so.

You need a ginger Tom or Maybe a tabby. Definitely not torties.

It really is luck of the draw with personalities. In my mum-kitten poor, the mum was tort, kitten (f) black and white. She was an amazing mum, got irritable with her kitten about 6 months in, but they gave each other space and things settled. They would have the occasional spat, but Mum was boss and that was that (super affectionate with humans, but cat-wise only ever tolerated her kitten). She ended up with a kidney issue when she was 6, sadly, so we only have her kitten now.
DancingChairs · 04/04/2022 19:11

Pair, not poor.

WildFlowerBees · 04/04/2022 19:17

We have 2 moggies, both affectionate but I'd say the male is much more dog like Grin I think males in general are more affectionate (or so I'm told) HRH girl cat is so lovely but will cuddle on her terms usually between 2 and 4am. She is exhausting but I wouldn't be without them.

AnIconOfImperfections · 04/04/2022 19:20

@Icequeen01

Two of mine are part Birman part local ginger Tom. They are gorgeous cats which I got from our local rescue. Slightly nervous of strangers but absolute cuddle monsters with us. We got them when they were 5 months old and they would have been perfect for a young family. Such a shame that Rescues won't consider you.
What beautiful cats!
Original poster
BeeKeeping · 04/04/2022 19:34

The experience of having a pregnant cat and looking after her and her kittens is something that I've always aspired to, but I'd have to purchase a female and then breed from her and that feels really exploitative! I know that pedigree breeders do an excellent job, but if you just want a moggie it's very hard to find a reputable breeder. As I'm finding out...

I feel that there must be a poor wee young mama cat somewhere looking for a nice new home and I could provide that, plus getting the amazing experience of raising a litter.

On paper I’m not an ideal candidate, with a 3 year old and an 8 month old, and 2 other cats!.. however I’m a very experienced cat owner and although my household sounds chaotic its really not. Its actually very quiet 90% of the time. I recognize that the settling period and first few months I will have to be very focused to keeping everything quiet and familiar, but I do think that kittens raised with other pets and kids do benefit from it in the long run and would be easier to rehome thereafter.

OP posts:
FionaJT · 04/04/2022 20:06

It might be worth approaching local vets, particularly if you're already known to them as a responsible pet owner. We adopted direct from a vet - I was planning on visiting our local rescue for a cat and a vet nurse friend offered to ask around in case there were any strays at vets looking for homes. Obviously she vouched for us as suitable, and we had a new cat home within 48hrs. He's black, an accomplished mouser and clearly has some oriental genes (he's an incredibly vocal dog-cat).

chinoisthrow · 04/04/2022 20:19

My friend has taken in an abandoned unchipped kitten. Unclaimed. Vet says she's bengal cross. She's beautiful but absolutely nuts. I couldn't cope if she were mine

Original poster
BeeKeeping · 04/04/2022 20:32

@FionaJT That's a brilliant idea. I'll call our vet tomorrow

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 04/04/2022 21:26

@chinoisthrow

My friend has taken in an abandoned unchipped kitten. Unclaimed. Vet says she's bengal cross. She's beautiful but absolutely nuts. I couldn't cope if she were mine
They don’t calm down either, it’s life in the fast lane.
Nomoreusernames1244 · 04/04/2022 21:35

There are shitloads of bengals in rescue or up for rehoming, with good reason.

They can be a nightmare. A cat shaped toddler. Howling at 3 am, wanting carried everywhere, the 4d zoomies- for the 16 years I had my bengal every surface was completely clear, nothing on shelves, window ledges, it would all get knocked off. No glasses of water by your bed, it would be dumped all over your head at 5am. The stealing, the neighbours knocking on your door because they’ve broken in again and are wailing they can’t get out.

My dog is far, far easier than my bengal ever was.

Go for a moggie. Tortoishells have that “edge” to them, all female though. Not sure what the difference is once they’re neutered mind.

Fluffycloudland77 · 04/04/2022 21:42

@Nomoreusernames1244

There are shitloads of bengals in rescue or up for rehoming, with good reason.

They can be a nightmare. A cat shaped toddler. Howling at 3 am, wanting carried everywhere, the 4d zoomies- for the 16 years I had my bengal every surface was completely clear, nothing on shelves, window ledges, it would all get knocked off. No glasses of water by your bed, it would be dumped all over your head at 5am. The stealing, the neighbours knocking on your door because they’ve broken in again and are wailing they can’t get out.

My dog is far, far easier than my bengal ever was.

Go for a moggie. Tortoishells have that “edge” to them, all female though. Not sure what the difference is once they’re neutered mind.

They have negative points too, before you all look into getting one.
Springdaisy · 04/04/2022 21:51

If you let bengals out, they might not come home often. I have 2 friends with bengals and they roam really far dont come home every day and are regularly spotted in areas 30mins drive away from home.
We got a burma kitten recently and he is just like a dog. The kids can carry him around and cuddle him. He always comes to cuddle when we have people over. Always wants to be the center of attention and never gets tired of the kids. Hes literally perfect, but i guess im biased.

Whatwouldnanado · 04/04/2022 21:58

Moggies all the way. Get two. Gingers are brilliant

Which kitten? Help me decide!
SellFridges · 04/04/2022 22:05

We have a one year old ginger moggie. Bought locally for the price range you mention as our local rescues would not allow us a young cat and that was our strong preference. He’s brilliant, fairly timid but getting bolder, loves a good cuddle, and runs to the bottom of the stairs every time the doorbell rings to see who it is.

Hummingbirdcake · 04/04/2022 22:08

Our neutered ginger tabby boy was very friendly and affectionate- a real Dog Cat. Other ginger boy owners have said the same.