Letting cats out

[Georgina125]

Hello there. We have 2 cats who are 18 months old. We got them just before lockdown last year so our plan to let them out was scuppered by vets delaying their vaccinations/spaying/neutering. Then we read that cats should be kept in where possible because they could catch coronavirus. On top of this,I became pregnant towards the end of last year, so we were even more concerned about coronavirus.

In the last few months, with vaccinations going so well and better weather coming,I broached the subject of letting the cats out with my husband. He said he was scared that the cats would never come back if we let them out and he would prefer them to remain as indoor cats. I was not happy with this because both cats seem keen to get out and it feels cruel. Recently he relented and we let the cats out for the first time. One cat was very cautious and didn't go far at all. The other cat almost immediately escaped the garden and disappeared. I found him not far away but calling him back didn't work and my husband panicked and picked him up. The second time we tried this,a similar scenario occurred.

My husband got very anxious and said he couldn't stand the idea of the cats getting lost or stolen so he pushed the idea of keeping them indoors again. I have suggested, as a compromise, cat-proofing the garden because, from a practical perspective, I can't see our young child always remembering to keep the cats in. I am not super happy with the cost of cat proofing (fence would need replacing and then brackets/netting done) but I can't see any other way to allay my husband's anxiety. I am heavily pregnant and we lost our DS a few years ago so I am not mentally in the best place to take charge of my husbands anxieties, hence trying to find a simple compromise.

Sorting out the cat proofing might take some time (my husband will procrastinate and I will be busy with baby any day now) but I think this is the best plan for now. Am I being logical?

I should say that we have bought some cat harnesses and will start using them this weekend so the cats can explore a bit. We will just follow them around and let them lead. This might help get them used to the sights and smells (must be overwhelming for them) and maybe calm my husband worries if he sees them not bolting immediately.

Did you get your cats as kittens?

If so I'm inclined to agree with your DH but cat proofing is a great idea...that said he need to step up to organise it as is sounds like you have enough on your plate atm.

Be warned OP. These threads always result in mixed advice.
The fact that your cats (or at least one of then) is already keen to have freedom means that if you decide not to let them out, you'll always be worried about your cats escaping anyway (and they will!).
Clearly cat proofing your garden is a better option than keeping them inside all the time. What sort of area do you live in, busy roads etc? This may also have an influence on what you do.
Mine have completely free access to the outside world. I suspect they are far happier animals as a result of this, but they have been used to going out from 5 or 6 months so have had plenty of time to develop 'outside skills'.

So if you really feel you (your DH) can't live with free access, a cat proofed garden is at least a reasonable compromise.

One thing to try is training them to come for Dreamies or other treats when you shake the packet and call for them. Do this in the house first, only give treats when you have summoned them from somewhere else in the house and only once or maybe twice a day.
At first only let them out when they are hungry, so just before you would normally give them wet food, for example. Again training them to come for food when you call will help.
It is always worrying when you let them out for the first time, but they do come home.
Their main risk of catching Covid is from you. You are the only people they will spend enough time with and close enough to get it. They won't catch it from other cats outside, or other people. Here's the advice on Covid from Cat Protection:
Covid and cats
and general advice about outside cats:
outside cats.

Our cats are 2 years old (brother and sister) for the first year, we lived in town so they were indoor cats. We tried a bit of lead walking, some supervised garden access, and girl-cat was anti-lead, but also not inclined to wander.

Boy cat took every chance he could do escape, it was becoming a battle of wills keeping him in.

Last year we moved more rurally, and put in a cat flap so they're allowed out during the day. Girl cat generally still sticks to our garden, boy cat roams - although he's only not come home once (found him stuck up a tree by a couple of dogs). They're both fit and healthy and I think much happier now they can come and go.

Having said that, if we were still in town, I would be catproofing the garden instead, as the roads are just too dangerous.

We have a brother and sister and have compromised by allowing them out during the day but keeping them in at night once they’ve been fed. They always come back at the time they get fed and we then don’t have to keep doors etc shut when everyone is in and out. Most cat accidents happen at night so you keep risks to a minimum by doing this.

Our two cats were indoor cats for over two years, this now being the third summer we have had them I have started letting them out. Last year was too much of a pain making sure doors were shut in the nice weather etc.

I was like a very anxious parent when we first let them out, especially when they first went out of sight. I am getting used to it now though and they have a good hour or so outside in the week and more at the weekend...they don;t tend to go far and keep coming back and going again.

Saying that they don't have unlimited access to outside....they stay in most of the day (and sleep) while we are out and I let them out when I get home from work, leave the back door open and they usually come back in after about 1hr - 1.5hrs.

I tend to feed them dry food in the morning and then they cen be encouraged in by their favourite food once they have been out.

Do they have favourite treats? You could try and train them to come to specific call or shake of a tin or whatever, if you start this inside it might work outside too.

Cats have the right to roam in the UK because it is recognised that this is a basic need for them. Some cats are willing house cats but the majority benefit from having the opportunity to roam. Does that come with risks? Mostly definitely yes but they are a species designed to live with that risk. Frustrating their natural behaviours to give their life longevity to bring human owners happiness is a spectrum where each individual family has to make their own decision. I have anxiety and the personal decision my husband and I have made is that I mitigate my anxiety through checking and controlling where I can but I don’t allow myself to do anything to elevate my anxiety if it means restricting my children’s or pet’s life and their own choices.
I’m so sorry for your loss and can see what what you’ve written that both you and DH have a lot of emotions that are so very hard. Displacing anxieties onto other living animals is, in my personal opinion, not a healthy route to go down. For them or for you.
Good luck finding a solution that works for you, your DH and your cats. All the best with your pregnancy.

Thank you all so much for your advice. We live in a quiet cul-de-sac. There is a main road but they would have to go up a hill and around quite a few bends to get there.

I think I will do more treat training with them. I did try luring them with treats when they went out but the smells of the outside were too alluring. Possibly need to train a bit harder with them...

We have had the cats since they were kittens so the outside world is all new to them. I will push him to sort out the new fence and cat proofing, the cats will cope with a couple months more.

It's a very divisive subject so I'm grateful no one is accusing us of being terrible people.

I'd be training them to turn up to a call of their name + treat/dinner.

Then you can let them out in the day, come in for dinner and then that's it.

The biggest risks to cats and wildlife are twilight and overnight so you have reduced but not eliminated the risk.

Good idea to cat proof the garden. We live in a quiet cul de sac, but our 3 (sadly now deceased) Burmese cats were way too daft to be allowed out in the street. We sorted the garden out, and the cats could come and go in the back garden as they pleased, no need for a cat flap, yours truly was their personal door opener. Trained them to come in for food/Dreamies. The greedy one got wise to this, and would come in with the other 2 when called, but when he saw the back door being closed he would shoot out like greased lightening.....so he'd get more Dreamies for coming in again. Dunno if I trained him to come in, or he trained me to give him cat sweeties!

@UpHillandDownAle

Cats have the right to roam in the UK because it is recognised that this is a basic need for them. Some cats are willing house cats but the majority benefit from having the opportunity to roam. Does that come with risks? Mostly definitely yes but they are a species designed to live with that risk. Frustrating their natural behaviours to give their life longevity to bring human owners happiness is a spectrum where each individual family has to make their own decision. I have anxiety and the personal decision my husband and I have made is that I mitigate my anxiety through checking and controlling where I can but I don’t allow myself to do anything to elevate my anxiety if it means restricting my children’s or pet’s life and their own choices. I’m so sorry for your loss and can see what what you’ve written that both you and DH have a lot of emotions that are so very hard. Displacing anxieties onto other living animals is, in my personal opinion, not a healthy route to go down. For them or for you. Good luck finding a solution that works for you, your DH and your cats. All the best with your pregnancy.

Absolutely get what you are saying here. I think this is the view I have. That keeping them in would keep them safe but might make them miserable too. Like keeping in our child- yes he would never experience the various cruelties of the world but he would also never really live.

I am guilty of worrying a lot about the cats too,hence going along with keeping them in during coronavirus. But I was always working towards this Summer being outdoors time for them. I was shocked when DH suddenly put the brakes on. The problem is that I am usually the one that "fixes" things. He gets anxious, I take over and sort it out. Now I'm not in a position to do this, I will have to really push to get him to do it.

My cat is 3 and is now an outdoor cat. I moved from a very busy road (where she was in for her own safety) to a semi rural location where she now goes out. She is SO much happier. She never goes far- one or two gardens over and comes to the Dreamies rattle but I think if you're in a safe area, them having not been out as a kitten isnt a barrier to them safely going out

@StapMe

Good idea to cat proof the garden. We live in a quiet cul de sac, but our 3 (sadly now deceased) Burmese cats were way too daft to be allowed out in the street. We sorted the garden out, and the cats could come and go in the back garden as they pleased, no need for a cat flap, yours truly was their personal door opener. Trained them to come in for food/Dreamies. The greedy one got wise to this, and would come in with the other 2 when called, but when he saw the back door being closed he would shoot out like greased lightening.....so he'd get more Dreamies for coming in again. Dunno if I trained him to come in, or he trained me to give him cat sweeties!

I will definitely increase training whilst we wait to cat proof the garden. I'm sure the cats won't mind treat training....

Can I ask how you cat proofed the garden? We are going to put up a 6ft fence all around and then use brackets plus cat proof mesh/wire to create an inwards overhang.

I wonder if it would work better for you in the long run if you don’t look at cat proofing the garden & find away to let them be indoor/outdoor cats & do find away to push through your DH anxieties. It sounds as though that’s what you actual feel is best in your family’s situation and oherwise this same pattern of “he gets anxious, you take it over and fix it” will be a repeating pattern for your child/children too. A lot of people I know who worry about this let their cats roam during the day and bring them in at dusk. If they have a cat flap then they get one that they set to be “in only” late afternoon and set to be “in and out” again in the morning. Cats are creatures of habit so they’ll soon recognise the daily pattern. Personally I don’t think leads etc allow cats to exhibit their natural behaviour. Studies have shown that dogs look to their human owners for comfort in new surroundings and can quickly become very comfortable with leads etc. Cats are not like this and rely solely on themselves and wish to ignore all humans until comfortable in their surrounds. Treating cats as little dogs does the opposite of meeting their needs in my opinion.

Tbh it sounds as if you live in a safe location for cats so I would not bother with cat proofing the garden. I would start training them to come to the dreamies packet shake and name calling.

We live on a busy road so letting our cats roam would be guaranteeing a short life for them. I live in Australia and here we do not think that indulging our pets is more important than preserving native species. Cats are prolific hunters and can absolutely decimate local wildlife. Also one of our cats is pure white so the vet advised us to keep her inside to reduce the chance of skin cancer.

We have two cats who are 6 years old and are extremely happy and affectionate. The first couple of years we had to be attentive to keep them in but these days if one gets out they pretty much turn around and come straight back inside!

The cat harnesses are a short term measure to help cats and DH get used to the cats going out. Definitely not going to walk them like they are dogs.

Re: DH and his anxiety. It's very difficult because he spirals- can't sleep, can't eat and can't seem to rally himself. In the past, I have just taken charge so he can feel better but now he needs to do it for himself. So, my plan is to train the cats with treats, let them outside on harnesses and let him organise cat proofing. That way I am not taking charge of his anxiety, the cats can have more outside time (albeit temporarily on harnesses) and he will have to work towards sorting out the garden. Possibly during this process, he will see how happy the cats are outside and work on his anxiety.

To cat proof our (small) garden we added metal brackets to the top of the 6 foot or so high fences. The brackets were bent inwards at 45 degrees and joined together with chicken wire. Let the wire sag a bit in the middle, that way it's not so nice for a cat to walk on, should it manage to get up there. The effect is not too handsome, so we grew non woody climbing plants up the fences like golden hop and ivy. Be aware that a cat can (and will! ) jump up from garden furniture etc, so keep stuff jumping distance away from the fences. Also watch for trees and branches etc. If another cat manages to get in (the saggy wire should help to stop this) it won't be able to get out, you will have to catch it and evict it. My cats were dozy, so this system worked well for us, plus they were not let out unsupervised anyway. For a determined escapologist, you'll have to spend more; there are several systems online.

We let them out on harnesses for 20 minutes this evening. They had a good sniff around but then didn't respond to treats to persuade them to come in. Something I am happy to work on. But now both cats are whining a lot because they want to be outside and DH is sat quietly stressing out because he feels they would never have missed the outside if we hadn't let them out. I've come upstairs to get away from it all and lie in front of a big fan. Can't decide if the cat harness idea has made things worse or better. I thought it was a useful halfway house until the fencing was sorted but maybe not.

My cat howled for more when we started taking him out on a harness. We distracted or ignored him and within a week he knew there was a walk in the morning and evening and to stop asking In between. The cat proofing was finished yesterday and he has been out in the garden all day testing it.

@DidSomebodySaySiamese

My cat howled for more when we started taking him out on a harness. We distracted or ignored him and within a week he knew there was a walk in the morning and evening and to stop asking In between. The cat proofing was finished yesterday and he has been out in the garden all day testing it.

Thank you for reassuring me. I think I'm probably just very hormonal today! DH has calmed down and watched a cat proofing video. I think I need to be patient and let him sort it out. Possibly go to bed early