Night time behaviour, at our wits' end!!

[haliborange0verdose]

Our 18 month old cat is an absolute fiend at night. We haven't had a full night's sleep in months due to his behaviour. If we leave our bedroom door shut, he starts scratching on it at around 3am, building up to loud meowing, scuffling and then full on throwing himself against it. If we leave the door open, he comes in and bites our feet, scratches on the sheets, jumps up and walks on us, etc. He is relentless and will stay scratching and thumping at the door for up to an hour at a time, multiple times through the night. We've tried all the advice about active play for an hour or so before bed, followed by a specific signal that we are going to bed and it's time for him to settle down. He has the full run of downstairs and when he does sleep, it's on the couch. All his toys are in the living room, litter tray and dry food in the kitchen. He just seems incapable of entertaining himself throughout the night and wants to wake us up. He is mostly an indoor cat - due to our location in a built up area with drivers that see the speed limit as a minimum rather than a maximum, I never felt safe letting him roam. He has a Protectapet enclosure in the yard so goes outside, but not away from the house.

I feel absolutely broken by the lack of sleep and don't know what to do. Can anyone help please??

Lock him downstairs at night. Our cat will wake up the kids if we don't. I'd also sake him up in the day to play more. Try installing some cat walkways, rotate his toys, get a laser pointer.

Oh dear I really sympathise. We are going through something similar with our 7 month old kitten, though it is getting a bit better. Like you, we sought further advice, especially how to deal with your kitten at night (wake it up, play with it, give him a big meal).

We think our kitten tries to wake us up for 2 main reasons: he is hungry and/or he's bored and wants our company, and for us to engage with him (hence pouncing on our bed).

We have bought an auto cat feeder and we set this for 2 am with a small meal of dried food (as his last evening meal is at 9 and then not until 6am, so 9 hours is a long time for him to go without a meal!

He's normally okay up to 2am and happy to rest near us or keep himself self-occupied. But if after 2 he starts to scratch etc, we put him just outside the bedroom door. He will scratch and whinge for a bit but then usually gives up. Some nights are better than others and it helps that we go early to bed and early to rise. We always save his daily food so he can have a big helping at the time we go to bed.

I think in this way we are getting into a routine, which I think most cats will respond to. The other thing that does strike me is the fact your cat is mostly indoors or confined to the garden (is that right?) Ours does go out and we did "train" him to get used to traffic etc, and he seems quite aware and savvy. It may be something to think about for yours, in order to keep him occupied?

I have to shut my cat in the living room at night. Never had to do that with a cat before but she's a nightmare. With my previous cats I used those net style barriers and they knew if they went up it was bedtime and they were to stay on the other side.
The cat I have now is relentless. She bangs on the doors and scratched the paintwork. We've just had to put baby gates up for our baby and it's worked better for the cat than shutting the doors. She can't get through the downstairs one and other than tapping on it half the night, she's a lot quieter.

We lock our cat in the laundry room at night . He keeps us all awake otherwise with his antics. He sleeps happily through the night and is a happier cat for it I think so I don't feel the least bit guilty.

Just lock him in a room downstairs? Either the kitchen - which would be preferable - or in a smaller room if you absolutely have to.

Don't martyr yourself to a cat for god sake. I have one and I'm certain she'd be popping in to wake us up if given the opportunity to!

You cannot train a cat btw. It's not a dog so it won't suddenly stop coming in to your room or scratching outside it

Lock him in the kitchen. I had to with mine when they used to dive bomb us from the top of the wardrobe at studid o'clock

We just let ours bother us 🤦🏻‍♀️ they definitely own us, not the other way round.

Of course you can train a cat! Mine understand fuck off at three am and a swift pillow to the face reinforces it

They also sit on command and come to their names

I await the OPs update in that case saying she's managed to train the cat to not come in at night

Mine come in they just know better than to disturb me 🤣🤣🤣

Lock them downstairs at night - mine can't even get up the stairs. They have the run of the kitchen/dining/living rooms, as well as access to food, water and their litter trays.

I read SO many threads on here where owners tolerate their cats waking them up multiple times in the night and I just think it's bonkers. Shut him downstairs. As long as he has everything he needs, he'll be fine.

We also put our cat in the laundry room at night - it’s what Cat’s Protection advised us to do when we adopted her. Her litter tray is always in there along with a bed (but she won’t sleep in there during the day) then we just give her some dried food and a couple of toys.

So, a bit of an update. Husband was originally loath to shut cat in overnight so I agreed to give it one week of "alternative measures" - we bought an automatic feeder, set to open at 5am which was roughly when he'd want food. Bought a Feliway diffuser and put it in the living room with him. However, nothing changed - he ignored the food even after the lid had opened, and came upstairs for me. Flinging himself at the bedroom door, scratching up the carpet on the landing, meowing louder and louder. Sunday night, I decided he'd had his chance, and my way was taking over. So I left him in the living room, with literally everything he could need - litter box, food, water, toys, even "videos for cats" playing on YouTube, so I couldn't feel I was being cruel.
And..... Success! He stayed put, didn't try to scratch the door down, and only meowed when he heard me getting up. It's only been two nights so far, but getting a decent night's kip for the first time in about six months is an amazing feeling!!

This is the little blighter, looking as though butter wouldn't melt!

well, yes. Just locking him in a room was always going to be the east and obvious solution!

But glad it's sorted