19 year old cat, incontinence and stopped grooming

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Our sweet old cat has taken a turn for the worst this past week. She’s stopped grooming (and stinks), and her crunky hind legs just about get her up and down stairs. She also seems to be getting incontinent as we find drops of liquid cat poo around the house.
She’s not in pain and is eating a bit. Mostly sleeping. But is obviously reaching her end. How long does she have? And is there a point when she can’t function properly that we should help her along? Honestly don’t know what to do.

Sadly, it’s time.

I often regretted being too late...

It’s a tough call, but do it, ‘cos you love her, then weep.
You clearly love her, you will be doing the best for her.

You have my absolute sympathy.

Aw, poor old girl. Big hugs for you too.

Cats hate being dirty. It's better to take her in to the vet sooner than later, she'll become upset. But for a checkup, not for being put down - she might just have a UTI and be back to normal after a course of antibiotics.

I'm so sorry, but it's time. Cats are ridiculously good at hiding pain so you just don't know. What I would say is that cats are clean animals by nature and if she's having accidents she won't be happy. Sometimes you just have to make the call and do the saddest but kindest thing you will ever do for a pet. I know how hard it is.

Actually, I would be willing to bet she is in pain. Cats are very good at hiding it. Sadly, it's time for her to be put out of her suffering, and the sooner the better for her. I'm so sorry.

I completely agree with you, @Aquamarine1029.

She's already in pain. Time to do her a kindness, OP.

Definitely time. As others have said, once cats are showing pain, they are in a lot of pain. They’re very good at hiding it.

So sorry that you’re dealing with this OP.

Also, I truly believe that it’s best to do it a little too soon rather than a little too late, for their sakes.

Thanks everyone. DH is reluctant to do anything today as he thinks she looks perkier and was purring at him this morning. We’ve agreed to wait a few more days and see how she looks. It’s such a hard decision.

Take her to the vets. She might have something that can be cured and get her back to normal. If she doesn't, then it's already time. Please.

They do purr to comfort themselves... it's not always a sign of contentment OP.

Please do make a vet appointment.

Update - and sadly bad news. It turned out to be lymphoma, with a big mass in her stomach. There was no real option except to put her to sleep there and then. Because of COVID I wasn’t allowed in the clinic so sat in the car outside. After 19 years it’s very strange not having a cat around the house.

Just wanted to say I'm sorry. You've lost a family member, and it's painful.

Try and take some comfort from knowing you did the best you could for her xx

I'm so sorry, OP. You did the best thing for her, but it must have been heartbreaking not being with her inside the vet's.

for you and your cat x.

We are in the same position with our old cat. She is really struggling and stopped grooming a few months ago. She has a open sore on her chest and the vet keeps giving her steroids and antibiotics but it's not healing and keeps ripping her chest open.

I have a 19 year old too and I've decided the next time she's ill it's time. She's ok right now but it's time for her to be on the end of life pathway now.
Horrible decision to make but we must do it for them.

Just read the update I'm so sorry.

OP I am so sorry to hear you lost your most beloved cat. I lost mine in April during lockdown and am still devastated. He was only 13 but had heart failure and wasn’t getting better. I still cry about it every now and again and will never forget him. Sorry, I get really teary about these things.