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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

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Original poster

Cat harness..cruel or ok?

24 replies

Jj2431 · 07/08/2020 09:38

what is your opinion on cats going out on a harness and lead? I've written a lot recently about my cat not wanting to come home etc now I'm pregnant and she has been terrorising cats in the area out of their homes and trying to move in with people. Yesterday my husband emailed the rescue asking them to take her back behind my back but he has since apologised and has agreed to work on it. We have ordered some feliway but I know my cat likes going out, at this point I can't trust she will come back and will start terrorising the neighbourhood, so I was debating a harness and lead temporarily whilst we sort this situation out so that she can still get out? Once baby is born (should be in the next week) and routines have hopefully settled I'd try letting her out with out it again. Yay or nay?

OP posts:

Finfintytint · 07/08/2020 09:42

No. It will stress her even more. I remember your other thread and I don’t think she is suited to your set up. She would probably do much better in a rural environment with fewer neighbouring cats about. Let the rescue advise you how best to proceed.

Original poster

Jj2431 · 07/08/2020 09:44

I'm not giving up on her. I don't think she isn't suited to our home as before I became pregnant me and her were the best of friends and she always used to come home and wasn't terrorising the cats in the area so I'm sticking with her and trying to put things into place to de stress her and get the bond back.

OP posts:

Allergictoironing · 07/08/2020 10:36

Would it be possible to cat proof your garden - not cheap I know, but a best of both worlds in your situation. Then she can't get out, other local cats can't get in.

She may well change once the baby is born, you just can't tell until after the event. In the meantime, hopefully some of the posters who do take their cats for walks on a harness will be along.

Toddlerteaplease · 07/08/2020 10:37

I've taken mine for walks round the car park in front of my house for walks. They are fine. Until they want to go under the cars!

EachandEveryone · 07/08/2020 10:50

She will hate it she’s not used to it. Can you cat proof your garden?

ivfdreaming · 07/08/2020 11:07

She's 8 isn't she? Absolutely NOT the time to introduce a harness on an already stressed cat.

Be prepared for further changes when baby arrives - we had one cat move out permanently when DD was born (he was a stray who moved himself in 2 years previously)

I'd probably get DH to bring a blanket home from the hospital that is washable so that you can introduce the baby smell before you come home

Also I've also heard of people playing baby crying noises from u tube to prepare their pets

This could go one of two ways - either she'll settle down when your pregnancy hormones are no longer affecting her or she'll leave permanently

Tavannach · 07/08/2020 11:14

I'm sorry but I think the cat is telling you as clearly as she can that she would rather live elsewhere. The situation isn't going to improve with a new baby in the house.

Original poster

Jj2431 · 07/08/2020 11:21

Why are people so quick to tell me to give up before I've exhausted all options? Why would I want to put an 8 year old cat back into a rescue centre when it took over a month before we came along. We were the only ones who had asked about her the whole time she was there. Today, she came to both me and my husband for fuss, maybe there is hope. I'm not just going to give up before I've seen what happens when baby is born. Ok, it is a no to the harness but maybe in time if i settle her with regards to baby I'll be able to let her out again

OP posts:

Bargebill19 · 07/08/2020 11:28

What about building a secure catio for her to be in when she wants to go out?

My cats are all on harness and leads and it’s fine, but they have known no other way as they were all put into harnesses from 9 weeks old. I’m not sure an older cat would cope as she’s already stressed.
I’m wondering could her unsettled state be due to your pregnancy hormones? Maybe things will settle once the baby arrives? I’m only basing this on you saying your pre pregnancy relationship was fine.

I think it’s great that you aren’t abandoning her. Fingers crossed a solution occurs.

Original poster

Jj2431 · 07/08/2020 11:34

Thank you @Bargebill19

Unfortunately I only have a small yard so not enough room for a catio especially with 2 kids that also go out there. At some point we will be moving home though so will look into it then when we have a garden if the situation hasn't improved

OP posts:

Pebblexox · 07/08/2020 11:45

I'm a cat mama.
I'm sorry to say it really does sound like she just isn't suited to your new situation. A harness on a cat that is older than a kitten more than likely won't go well, she won't take to it and it will just make her more likely to want to run and leave.
If you don't trust her to go out, and you can't proof the garden for her I'm really not sure what other options you're looking for.
Your only other thing would be to train her to be an indoors pet, but unfortunately I think it's just too late for that to be acceptable.

JizzPigeon22 · 07/08/2020 11:48

You need to rehome her, you’re being selfish.

Fluffycloudland77 · 07/08/2020 12:54

I wouldn’t give up either. She might revert to normal after you give birth if she’s ok with kids but not pg women.

You can give her cystease capsules for the weeing problem.

There’s videos on YouTube showing you how to leash train them as adults, it’s a slow process and you need one they can’t wriggle out of backwards.

RedKittyCat · 07/08/2020 14:06

We are using a harness until the catio is finished but our kitten has been wearing a harness from 12 weeks and now gets very excited when he sees it and gets in it no problem. Once the catio is finished the next thing on our list is to cat proof the garden. If you have a small garden the overhanging netting that fixes to existing fences and walls might be an affordable option?

elephantfeels · 07/08/2020 14:08

I wouldn't give up OP.

Is there a room in the house that she could have for the time being/ could you section a room in the house off?

When my cat had an operation on her leg she went out on a harness to stop her jumping over fences etc she was 10 at the time. We put her in the harness around the house first and let her get used to it for a week then attached the lead and went round the house and then took her out. It took patience but it can be done

Original poster

Jj2431 · 07/08/2020 14:45

We have set up a big crate for her(it's always open) as a safe space for her to go with a comfy cushion in. Her food and water are in the room too and litter tray (all in diff areas), she has the choice to be in there or to come into the living room with us it's up to her. We have feliway coming tomorrow and I'm looking into a good cat tree so she has someone higher to go but can be in same room as us x

OP posts:

Bargebill19 · 07/08/2020 15:03

Sounds like a good starting point!! Fingers and paws are crossed for you.

RedKittyCat · 07/08/2020 15:41

Hope it makes a difference. Good luck

StatisticallyChallenged · 07/08/2020 15:45

I'd definitely recommend a good cat tree - mine love to go up there if little one is being a bit rowdy

For those recommending OP rehomes, I seem to recall from previous thread that she's ready to pop and that this isn't her first child. So it seems to me worth sticking it out until baby arrives as the cat has lived with young kids before and been fine so may well revert to normal. It might be different if there were months of pregnancy to go and this was a first baby.

AlwaysLatte · 07/08/2020 15:47

She probably won't like it at first but I'm sure she'll get used to it. I side to take my cat for a walk when we took her on holiday with us.

Original poster

Jj2431 · 07/08/2020 16:27

I know this is probably small but she is sitting with me and has licked my belly! I was even playing newborn crying on my phone and she didn't flinch.

OP posts:

MrMeSeeks · 07/08/2020 16:36

I did harness and lead on an old cat, it did take a while but certainly used to it now! The first few times they did lie on the floor in protest so it take take a few attempts...

Bargebill19 · 07/08/2020 16:38

That’s encouraging!

Hoptercopter · 07/08/2020 17:31

It seems a little cruel to keep the cat indoors just to suit your own situation if she is used to being able to roam outside. She will surely be missing the freedom.
Cats are usually very independent and we try to make them 'ours' but they are not really, they do their own thing, that's their nature.
I hope she settles down after your child is born but if not then maybe you should consider either rehoming or letting her out and see what happens rather than keeping her confined.

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