Cat run over today - how to tell child??

[bella1426]

Hi All, our beloved 2 year old cat was found this morning on the side of a road having been hit by a car and I'm devastated. The most upsetting part is thinking of how my 8 year old son is going to react as he was obsessed with him. Anyone any tips on breaking the news and helping children through the grieving process?

Sorry to hear this. This happened to me twice as a child so I would suggest the following. Don't tell him at the school gates like my mum did. Don't use euphemisms. Make it clear that the cat is not coming back.

Aw, our 1 year cat was hit by a car last year. My children were 10 and 8 and devastated. I was honest. We buried her in the garden. It's hard but time heals.

I still get upset about it now. We've got a puppy now. I'm not risking more cats on our busy road.

Sending hugs, it's an awful thing to happen xx

Thank Helen, I am not sure whether to be brutally honest about it being a car (is the image too violent?) or that he was sick and the vet had to put him down (lying + opening up for way more awkward questions maybe not ideal...) Any thoughts?
Also thinking puppy as a next pet for the same reason :(

Be honest about the car. If you say he was sick that could lead to goodness knows what e.g. he was fine this morning but suddenly had to be put down? I think that is scarier for a child.

Tell the truth, keep it simple.

Same happened to us. I was honest. He got hit by a car while he was happily playing. It happened very quickly and he wouldn’t even have known it. He won’t be coming back. We all loved him very much and we will remember him in all the stories we tell about him.

Broke the news at home with just us, well before bedtime and once I’d got myself under control!

So sorry to hear this, Bella.
Two of our cats got run over when I lived with my parents, although I was in my teens and 20s, and it’s my biggest dread with my current two.
I’d definitely be honest.
Don’t know if you’re going to bury your cat or have him cremated, but your son may well ask.

As someone who had a cat I was obsessed with run over I would advise being fairly honest about it but explain that it would have been quick and leave it at that. My mum saw mine be runover as the cat was sunbathing in the road. She went to go move her and as she got to the end of the drive a man going at 40 (down our residential 20mph road) ran her over. He apparently didnt stop od wven try to avoid her. Mum was and still is traumatised by it and I think that as an 11 year old it was more then I needed to know. I appreciate now that mum was just being honest but I was upset for months about it and it still really upsets me now.

My partner came home and got the body from the road. We don't really have the garden for burying (paved + artificial grass) so he was just going to dispose of it. Son is due to be picked up from school by his dad and staying there tonight as per schedule so won't see him till tomorrow evening. Maybe good to get a bit more composed but not sure what to say about the body - dead pets go to the vet and we can have a memorial at home or something?

Dispose of it how?
If you don’t know where your local pet crem is, your vet should be able to advise. I think a joint cremation with other pets is the cheapest option, it costs more to have an individual cremation.
Or is burial in a grandparent’s garden an option?

I’m so sorry for your loss OP . We lost our cat on the road and were devastated.

I told DS the next day once I could speak without crying. I told him what had happened, that it had been quick and that she wouldn’t be coming back. That she’d had a happy life with us (she was a rescue) and we loved her and were lucky to have had her at all. I got rid of all her toys, basket etc as it was too sad looking at them.

DS (5) cried a lot and was very sad for a while. We then got a dog as we couldn’t risk getting another cat.

I'd be honest about the car. It's a tough life lesson but one that needs to be learnt 😢

Our puppy has been no bother and it's lovely getting out and walking. So different to cats in that their not at all independent. That's quite nice though.

Maybe you could do something nice in memory of your cat? Plant some daffodils?

I'm sorry you've lost your cat.

If you want a memorial, you can ask for your cat's ashes to be returned. As pps have said, an individual cremation is more expensive. If you opt for a communal cremation, you can still request ashes but they'll include all the animals that were cremated alongside your cat.

My sister has her cats' ashes in pretty boxes on her mantelpiece and finds it comforting.

Im in the same predicament. Our 16week old kitten escaped and was hit Friday evening. We were going away for the weekend so I chose not to tell them and spoil it. I know I need to do it tomorrow but I have no idea what to say to them