What happens at the end?

[snarfblatt]

I posted previously about my poor cat who's just been diagnosed with lymphoma after months of vomiting. In the last 3 months he's lost a significant amount of weight and also stopped eating. The vet has given him steroids which can induce a temporary remission, and we have some anti sickness meds as well. Three days into the steroids there's no change, he's still not eating and continues to lose weight.

I think we're accepting now that he's probably near the end, unless he suddenly starts responding to the steroids - and even then, it would apparently only be a few months at most.

We're giving him lots of love, and I have another review with the vet next week at which I guess I'll be able to ask about next steps. But in the meantime, how will we know when he's nearing the end - and is it better to let things happen naturally or would it be kinder to have him pts? As much as I'd prefer him to be here in his home, I don't want to prolong his suffering (he's becoming noticeably slower and less energetic now but doesn't appear to be in pain, but the vomiting must be unpleasant and I imagine he feels quite weak given he's not eating).

I'm just feeling so upset for him, am dreading the moment when it comes, and am totally clueless about what happens next. I don't even know what happens to him after he's gone - we rent so can't bury him in a garden.

I don't feel I can talk to anyone in real life except my partner as I know it's inconsequential to everyone else but this is our little boy and I'm so sad for him I just want to make sure we do the right thing in his last few days/weeks (hopefully - but I think unlikely - months). Any advice or support would be gratefully received! And is there anything nice we can do to make the most of this remaining time? Planning on getting some pics of him with our DC so they remember him, make sure he has a lovely comfy safe place to sleep under our bed which is where he spends most of his time... but he's not interested in any food/treats or toys so I'm not sure what else we can do for him!

Thanks for reading.

@Ellabella989 So sorry to hear about your car, it sound like it was a lovely peaceful send-off, as far as that's possible

Cat!!! Sorry!

Just want to echo what everyone else has said... my 15yo cat was put to sleep 2 months ago through illness and it was peaceful at the end. They sedated him first and he just slipped away. Things I wish they had told me in advance:
Book the appt at a quiet time, I had to walk back through a packed waiting room crying with my empty travel box.
Pay in advance if you can - I forgot my bag and purse with all the upset.
Decide what container for ashes you’re having in advance - this wasn’t explained to me and the vet was talking about it just before he did the procedure and I wS too upset to even think straight about it.
Get someone to take you or go with you if you can - I found the whole thing very upsetting and wouldn’t have wanted to drive

Hello all, just to update - sadly, while our little boy responded initially to the steroids, it didn't last. He started throwing up again then stopped eating, and after three days with no food when he barely emerged from under the bed we decided to take him to the vet's, and they told us it was time. I don't think I even realised, as stupid as it sounds, how far gone he was until the vet was in front of me saying how thin he was, and how he had no interest in his surroundings, and was very probably in pain. Anyway, I was there with him when they put him to sleep, it was very peaceful even though it felt very sudden from the decision to the act itself - I didn't know when I left the house that he wouldn't be coming home with us

As it was the Blue Cross, they covered the cost of the appointment/euthanasia and cremation, and we opted not to go privately to have a private cremation and get his ashes. We left the carry case with them so they could donate it to a family in need.

I was crying all weekend and am finding it hard being in our flat as it feels so empty now, but I know it was the right thing to do. Not only was he so much a part of our lives for ten years, it also feels very strange to go from pet owners to not pet owners in an instant. We were so lucky to have him, I just wish he could have been with us for longer! We've told DS that he had to go to the hospital to sleep as he was poorly, so he's not upset although knows that he doesn't have a cat any more.

Sorry, this is rambly, I feel so heartbroken.

snarfblatt

I'm sorry. It's so hard isn't it, and that feeling that something is missing. For a long while after we had to make the same decision it took a long time to stop looking for furry hugs and head bumps.

It's been years for us, but we still talk about our boys and their crazy antics. Now the stories make us smile, more than sad; the time does come.

I'm sorry you're hurting right now. Be kind to yourself and I hope that one day in the not too distant future, your memories will also make you smile.

Ah @snarfblatt
I feel for you all. I think he was lucky to have you too.
Take care

So sorry to read your sad update, your poor boy, but he's not suffering anymore.