Cats and babies

[PoesyCherish]

I hope this okay and not classed as a TAAT. I read on here on earlier post about a lady struggling to adopt a cat because of her young child. We've just brought our adopted cat home and she seems to be settling in really well so far although we're only on day 3.

I was wondering what the general consensus is on babies and cats? If it's difficult to adopt a cat with a young child, would a cat(/s) be okay being adopted first and then say a year or so later having a young baby join the family or would it really unsettle them? I know every cat is different so I guess it depends. Ours responded well to 7 year old DSD when she met her at her foster Mum's but now we've brought her home she hasn't seen DSD yet although will be seeing her this evening. But I know a relatively calm 7 year old is v different to a screaming baby

The problem with people who are planning to have babies adopting cats, from the point of view of the rescue, is that so many new parents seem to suddenly decide that the cat is too much trouble/some sort of health risk to the baby. The amount of people asking us to take on their cat purely because they've just had a baby is unbelievably large. So any rescue would be concerned that you might turn out to be one of those people.

Of course cats can get upset by new babies, but generally speaking everyone manages to adjust after a while, so that isn't too much of a factor.

Of course toddlers and kittens are to be avoided at all costs as toddlers can and do kill kittens. And if someone already has young children and wants a cat then the right cat will need to be found - a laid back and not easily frightened/upset one.

A child that is seven years old shouldn't be a problem as long as they are well behaved and the parents supervise any interactions properly.

Does that answer your questions?

Cat Protection have a campaign about cats and babies to try and reduce the number of cats given up for adoption when babies come along, info here:

www.cats.org.uk/kids-and-kitties

In my experience babies and cats coexist quite happily, and cats love nothing more than a pregnant woman .

DS1 arrived when we had four cats 3 of which were only about 8 months old. It was amazing how many people asked us if we were getting rid of the cats . All our cats have been very relaxed around our DS's and really liked to lie next to them when they were babies.

Our old cat passed away (old age and taken in from the neighbour when he moved) and we thought we could offer a lovely home to another. We adopted a cat when I was 6 months pregnant. He is a large neutered male that was previously stray but is incredibly friendly and cuddly. He is fine with our baby who is now 5 months old. He usually watches her on her play mat from the sofa and occasionally head bops her if I'm holding her. We had plenty of family around to pop in whilst I was in hospital with baby and really the only change to his life is that he no longer sleeps in our bed.

My late cats were about a year and a half old when DS1 was born. One of them wasn’t bothered at all, one was curious and always came running when he cried. No negative issues at all. My DSs grew up very attached to the cats, and now they’re teens they’re just as besotted with our new kittens!

I've got 3 cats - 1 is a rescue.

I got her when I was single, she was re-homed to be an only cat with no kids. She was quite aggressive and very frightened. A few years down the line I met my now DH who had 2 cats so my cat had to learn to live with others. it took her a year or so but now they are all happy together.

Now I'm pregnant, so all 3 cats are going to have to learn to get on with the baby. We'll use Feliway, cats will be banished from the bedroom for 6 months (that part I am dreading). I'll give them plenty of time to adjust and reassurance - the cats aren't going anywhere though.

I am sure Cats Protection would never have let me take my rescue cat if they knew that 8 years on my home would be very different - but as the cat has settled and become confident, she has been able to cope with much more than was thought possible when she was younger and terrified. She's actually very friendly and likes other cats. I am sure she will like the baby.

Lots of cats come into rescues when a baby arrives hence the reason some may be reluctant to let people adopt if they plan on having children. There still seems to be a mindset that you can't have a cat and a baby. The tales of cats suffocating babies, the horrors of what you may get cleaning the litter tray out etc. Obviously you can be sensible around these things and it's all fine.
Some healthcare professionals do scaremonger-the midwives who came round were fine and mostly liked cats. The health visitor however clearly hated cats and made a big thing about it whilst Dcat quietly snoozed away. A couple of years later an eczema nurse also suggested the cat was the problem with DD's eczema which we knew wasn't the case.
We'd had our old cat less than a year and a half when DD arrived. She hid for about 2 hours after DD and I came home from hospital then was fine with her from then and they had a lovely bond so it was awful when she was PTS.

Usually it's easier for the cat if he's already established in the home when the baby arrives - much easier than being adopted to a home with a screaming baby for sure...

At our charity we also get a lot of requests to take on cats because people have had a baby or one is imminent. It often amazes me how people have had several months to prepare and then a week or two before the due date they seem to panic and need to give up the cat ASAP.

We do adopt out cats to homes with children but as others say above, it needs to be a laid back, confident cat without a history of aggression. A lot of the cats that come to us are timid, easily stressed, or can give the occasional hiss or swipe and of course they are not the best match to a home with small children. Even well-behaved, cat savvy children make the home feel a lot busier and noisier than a home with just one or two adults, of course.

Our baby is nearly four weeks old and my very spoiled cat has already adjusted well. I spend a lot of the day breastfeeding and feel guilty I can’t pay him as much attention but DP is doing his best and it will get easier as baby gets older. I hope they’ll be best pals eventually! We gifted cat the world’s biggest scratch tower (£££) just before the baby arrived which he adores, so he’s very much king of the castle still.

No end of threads on here of people wanting to get rid of a cat when they have a baby. Reasons vary from worrying about the cat smothering the baby, cat scratching baby, having to clean litter tray, cat gets shut out of the house when baby arrives so gets stressed and starts spraying...etc etc

None of these are the fault of the cat but it doesn't stop people treating them as disposable

We have never had a problem with cats and babies - most looked, sniffed and walked away in ill concealed disgust.

Thank you all for reassuring me. I'd not want to give up cat just because of baby - especially as she's here first!! The sanctuary didn't ask us about future plans in that sense, they only asked about future plans for the next 4-6 weeks (e.g. babies, holidays, parties etc)

Dcat was 9 when DD was born. The cat wasn't keen at first on the screaming baby but gradually adapted (& loved her playmat with things to bat on it). Now 9 years on They are best friends and Dcat has trained DD into being supplied of dreamies.

I think it's ridiculous. Cats don't kill babies and the people who go on about it to women as soon as there is a pink stripe on a test strip need to be taken outside and gently corrected with a baseball bat have their foolish misconceptions pointed out to them.

If somebody is concerned about toxoplasmosis, they can have a blood test to see whether they've ever come into contact with it.

I grew up in a fucking midden surrounded by unvaccinated/untreated animals, cats, dogs, rabbits, foxes, hamsters, assorted wildlife, visiting strays, etc, and was generally brought up on the floor with the beasties and all their parasites. I still hadn't ever came into contact with it.

As regards scratching, I imagine that I learned very quickly not to piss cats off - I know I would have been told 'serves you right' if I had hurt one of the animals, but I cannot remember ever being scratched or lashed out at - presumably I learned so young that it never happened when I was old enough to remember it.

My own pets have always been handled daily whenever I felt like it to teach them it's OK to be touched (I encouraged the OH to do the same with them when he moved in - he was used to farm cats who definitely don't approve of such things - and farm dogs that certainly weren't pets) - and they have never lashed out.

Cats have taken advantage of lived with humans for tens of thousands of years. If they genuinely killed babies, they wouldn't have made it through the first hundred without being exterminated. We haven't even done much to change their temperament, size or appearance (other than a few cosmetic changes) - because we haven't needed to. If they were dangerous to children, they'd be genetically separated into 'Toy Breeds' and 'Working Breeds' like we've done with dogs; they're fine as they are and have always been.

As regards scratching, I imagine that I learned very quickly not to piss cats off - I know I would have been told 'serves you right' if I had hurt one of the animals

Exactly! My DSD has grown up with cats since she was about 2 or 3. She learned pretty quickly not to piss them off and was told serves you right when the kitten scratched her.

Does anyone know the deal re changing cat litter when pregnant? Is it generally safe to do?

You’re more likely to get it from undercooked meat than a litter tray.

It’s very rare and cats most often don’t have the parasite at all. If they do, it takes a day with the poo sitting in the litter tray for it to become problematic, so as long as you change the litter tray daily it’s a non issue. Think the advice is to wear gloves and wash hands well afterwards.

I have 6 and they have all been very tolerant of DS who is 1 now, a couple are still wary of him but the others will sit with him and let him pat them

@PoesyCherish

My midwife says it is safer if DH does it, but if I need to do it, to use gloves and wash hands thoroughly.

DH has mainly taken it over but I have had to do it a few times when he forgets/is away.