Feel like I am a disappointment to my cats

[shouldwestayorshouldwego]

I have not yet managed to stop the onset of wintery conditions. I open the door, he sniffs, tells me to make it warmer, I have 20 minutes then he will check on my progress. 20 minutes later I have blatantly done nothing at all to make it warmer. He once again expresses his disgust at my poor work ethic and gives me another 20 minutes to think about what I have done and remedy it.

His sister has just declared she is not going anywhere until the end of March.

I share your feelings of being a failure. I have not only failed to improve the temperature, I am also unable to do nothing to stop it raining at either the front or the back of the house.

I, too, am a failure. I have not provided a patch of dappled sunshine on the grass beneath DCat's favourite bush for the past three weeks. Neither have I stopped the rain or warmed the temperature. I am doomed!

I have failed my cat by not rubbing her properly often enough. She has gone to the Christmas tree and is staging a sit in protest. Dog has not joined her as she doesn’t understand peaceful protest.

Is it a sit in protest? Or is there one eye on the baubles to destroy? @Inkspellme

I am a failure too, we moved in July and in the summer I could not provide an ‘other cat’ free neighbourhood.

Now they turn their nose up when even the door is open.

Bring on spring!

I think that one of my cats is actually trying to kill me. Wherever I walk somewhere in the house, she runs between my feet and tries to trip me up. My kids say I’m just paranoid though.

It could be one eye on the baubles but I very much doubt any paw would be raised. That would be seen as undignified and fall into the caragory of “play”. This cat does not do play. Her role is to be admired and fed. Mousecatching is also beneath her as well.

@blackcatsleeping I very much doubt you’re paranoid. Just be careful your cat doesn’t take it to a higher level ....

My master has told me she is very disappointed in my work as well. I too have failed to improve the weather and as her majesty likes to do her business outside rather than in a litter tray, I must somehow provide a wind and rain free path for her to access her pee spot on the lawn. DH and I did provide her majesty with umbrella protection when we escorted her but she refused on the grounds that she couldn't pee with us standing over her with a brolly!

I've failed buy not making all of the world "indoors", so she doesn't have to stay in one room post surgery.

Inkspellme, also, sometimes I'll be doing something like watching TV and I'll turned around and she'll be glaring at me intently, like I'm gunna fuck you up, bitch. I think it's because no matter how many times she's stuck her bum in my face, I've still refused to sniff it.

Well I sense a power struggle you’re never going to win. Perhaps make sniffing noises behind her but not actually sniff the bum. I’m not sure how that fits in with Mumsnet thinking however. Perhaps a “did you mean to be so rude is apt?” Or the old “Ni is a complete sentence”? Either way the cat is in charge here. Always.

I'm a double disappointment to mine. They look hopefully at me as I open the front door and shamefully close it again, following them dutifully through the house to the back door, where the weather will be better. It isn't.

The smallest one (who is not bright enough to stay in) attempts to come in through the cat flap by pressing her paw against it in a dramatic fashion, a lá Cathy, Wuthering Heights.

I'm under no illusions that Cheddar is trying to kill me! She's tried suffocation, trying to crush my trachea, nose squeezing and sleep deprivation.

Ive failed by not giving the dog away

In some ways I am glad that other slaves are similarly disappointing, makes my poor efforts seem the norm.

He is also disappointed that I listened to she who shall not be named who prodded him with needles and told me to clean his ears out, this is on top of the monthly disgusting stuff on his neck. She who shall not be named is having far too much influence.

On the positive side I have managed to edge the temperature today just into the acceptable range, however unfortunately I will probably fail to open the door at precisely the right millisecond to let him back in!

Having allowed boy cat to sleep on my bed (as usual) and cuddle/stroke him as required through the night, I unfortunately commited a grave misdemeanor by allowing the girl cat to jump onto the bed when he left to see if breakfast was forthcoming. He came in the room, saw her on the bed and gave me a most reproachful look.