New kitten still hisses at me

[MacNcheese87]

I posted a week or so ago about my new kitten, and
I got some good advice. (She bit my finger, it did swell up but was fine.) I wonder if anyone has experienced a similar situation with their kitten?

When we got her at 9 weeks, (from a breeder) she was very scared, didn't allow us to touch her, hissed if we looked in her direction and hid all day. It's been almost two weeks and the only thing that's changed is she is able to sit in the same room as us, albeit still hiding and running away if we make any movement at all.

I have a feliway plug in, and we try to keep her in the same room as us but with little private spots for her to hide when she wants. The idea is that she can see or hear us but she is left alone. We don't approach her much, and if we do, we don't touch her. All of our advances are met with a hiss and it just feels like she really hates us.

I know it's probably fear, but will she ever relax? She's eating and drinking fine, and she's using her litter box well, she just isn't very playful and is certainly not very cute lol. She has like us one day right?

She still sounds terrified. Leave her alone completely and let her come to you when she's ready. It can take months to settle and she's only a baby.

Don't make her be in the same room as you either. Let her do what she wants.

What kind of breeder did she come from? Was she raised in a home? What was mum’s temperament like?

The socialisation window for kittens is around 2-7 weeks old so it’s essential that they're Home-raised and used to people during this time. Trying to befriend a poorly-socialised kitten or one that has been raise in the absence of humans is very difficult

I had a similar issue, got 8 week old kittens from cats protection back in early June. One was fine after a day or so and became my little shadow, the other was and still is quite a bit more nervous.

Only in the last few weeks has she allowed me to pet her, and when she does she is very affectionate. But it's on her terms only. Agree with PP that you just need to give her space, let her figure out that she's safe and that this is her home.

I found talking to her, playing with her using a ball or feather toy and getting down to her level rather than towering above her helped. Patience is the key and all cats are different. She will let you know when she's ready for interaction. And when it does happen it's a lovely feeling

Defo some toys with your scent on focus on the kitten establishing one trust relationship at a time. Perhaps some cat nip will allow you a few belly rubs good luck

Google Jackson Galaxy the cat behaviourist.

She should have been with her mum and siblings until 12 weeks of age. She probably misses them. Get her a cosy bed or blanket with something soft (small teddy?) to cuddle up with.

Let her come to you when she's ready. 2 weeks is not long enough for a young kitten to be settled.

Cats, on average, live for 12-15 years, so you've got a long way ahead. Give her time and space, and keep the house calm and peaceful for her until she settles.

Cats don't usually like belly rubs (although some may tolerate it occasionally) as the underpart of their body is very sensitive

This happened to me when I was a kid. My Dad (stupidly) bought a kitten who was basically feral, had been living in a stable in a farm - no human contact. The cat is 16 now and basically still doesn't like human contact that much, the socialisation window is very small as a PP said. If you force contact, it's likely to make it worse. I got two kittens last year and the seller spoke to us about how his daughters would be holding the kittens as much as possible before we collected at 12 weeks, it's really helped ours be friendly and used to the noise and presence of our kids.

She sounds like the (semi)feral kittens I've come across at the charity where I volunteer. The good news is she's still young and it's absolutely possible to socialise her now but you need to get to work now.

She needs to be handled as much as possible. Leaving her to it like others are advising above is not going to work with a (semi)feral kitten. Look up Kitten Lady's video on You Tube on socialising hissy kittens. Ideally you'll want to wrap her into a blankie/towel and hold her on your lap as much as possible. It might be easier to get her a large dog crate for the next week or two. "Tough love" works - we see it work over and over again with kittens we rescue from gardens etc. who start out hissy.

I also recommend a vet check up as soon as possible just to make sure she's physically fine given the "breeder" sounds more of a backyard breeder than a responsible one...

Has she been to the vet - did she get a clean bill of health? My vet was great and showed us how to get her used to being handled. She was only six weeks though and, despite being abandoned by her mum at a very young age, she has adjusted to being a spoiled house cat very well!

What breed is she? I’m surprised the breeder let her go so early!

I would give her time and space. Let her know she can trust you not to push the boundaries. Slow blinking is very therapeutic for cats too.

No breeder should release a kitten before 12 weeks.

Do you know for certain this cat is the breed you wanted?

The kitten sounds feral.i'd take the kitten to your vet asap for a check up.

Out of interest, how much did you pay?

What a change we've had this evening!

To reply to a couple of posters, she's a british short hair (apparently pedigree ) and we got her from a breeder on the recommendation of a friend. Having looked more into it, I'm not sure of the legitimacy of the breeder at all and I know I should have checked this. After speaking to the breeder, all they offered was to take her back, but she's part of our family now and I like to think she's better off at home.

Anyway, the change. We kept her in the living room with us, so she could check us out and hear us/watch us for as long as she wanted. She normally hid behind the sofa or in her cat bed but she gradually started coming out at night, then in the evening and very recently, all day.

She has the option to hide, and she does most times people move, but she's also built up tons of confidence and is doing the expected kitten things like scrambling up the curtains, jumping from chair to chair etc. She is allowed all over the house but the last few days she's wanted to be in the living room with us.

And tonight, I got my first headbutt! She was asleep on the sofa next to me, about 3 feet away (closest she gets) and I gently touched her back to lightly stroke her and she immediately purred and went for more. It was so amazing!

I honestly had given up hope. I just resigned myself to having a cat for 20 years who would just hate me. Thank you for all your advice. There is still a way to go, she still hides and I don't expect her to be this approachable tomorrow but I can see the patience is paying off.

Oh and she's off for a new kitten check and jabs next week. Breeder said she'd been for a NKC but I'm apprehensive. I've been putting it off as I couldn't get near her to pick her up and when I did she would violently shake and defend herself.