I'm going to ask the vet for advice about my aggressive cat (long)

[Flamingoose]

Boy cat had a tough start in life. His parents were strays. He was abandoned at about 10 days old, probably because of severe eye ulcers. He was found and taken to a shelter where they operated on his eyes. I'm not really sure about his time in the shelter. They did their best, but it's not the ideal environment for a tiny kitten. We adopted him at about 5 weeks old. He is now 3.

He has always been a very special boy. He is enormous, for a start (7.5kg and pure muscle). His eyesight and balance are not great. He needs his own space. He has a happy life. He loves his food, he is very attached to us, he has his little habits and warm spots to snooze in and fluffy blankets to shag. He fights with other neighbourhood cats, but I won't make him an indoor cat - it would be like caging a tiger. He hunts unsuccessfully - eyesight and balance too wonky to catch anything.

We do our best for him, and we all bear the scars. He is extremely affectionate, but when he comes in for a cuddle there's only a limited time before he flips and lashes out. He can do some serious damage. He has drawn blood from everyone in the family. Eldest ended up on antibiotics due to a particularly nasty bite a couple of months back. I've noticed we sometimes go for a couple of months with nothing, and then suddenly he's bitey again. He's bitten and scratched me three times in the last few days - proper deep wounds.

I have never in all his life since he was tiny been able to casually stroke him, or pick him up, or be unaware of where he is. He blocks me into the kitchen sometimes and I have to use a towel to woosh him out of the way.

Typical scenario: I'm sitting reading. He pads in, all calm. He jumps up and purrs and rubs his head on me and settles down, nudging my hand for strokes. I stroke the top of his head once or twice. I go back to my book. He lies down to sleep on my lap. Then he flips, bites my hand several times, scratches all up my arm and runs away. He comes back within 10 minutes for another cuddle.

We know food is a trigger. We're 90% vegetarian but any time I cook meat we no have to shut him out because otherwise he goes berserk under the table. He lashes out like a snake.

Now, if you're reading this and thinking I should get rid of him, don't bother. He would never be adopted by anyone else and a life in a shelter would be too cruel. And putting him down is not remotely an option either. He is a happy, healthy boy who just needs to find a way to stop savaging the people who love him.

I'm going to take him to the vet and ask for advice. Do any hardcore cat experienced people have any words of advice or anything specific I can ask the vet about? We do love him, but honestly it's exhausting, and I wish the children didn't have to be aware of him all the time.

You mention shagging fluffy blankets. Is he neutered?

Yep. Of course.

I mean, yes he's neutered. As soon as he was old enough.

The usual question is - could he be in any pain? You mention that this doesn't happen all the time just every few months or so ). Since he fights it could be a response to injury?

Maybe. I always take him to the vet for a check over after a fight. Sometimes he is given antibiotics and pain relief. Occasionally he gets an abscess though, which means we've missed a wound.

I'd say he's either in pain, or he's play fighting, but is really rough and he doesn't know how to bite/get his claws out without hurting. I wonder if it's because he didn't get the chance to play fight with other kittens when he was little, and also because he's so big and strong?

We've got one of these cats - if he was a dog we would have had to put him down years ago for attacking people. He is also prone to wanting affection and then turning into a biting scratching terror with no warning and for no reason. He has got a little better with age - he's now 8 - and a deli way plug-in where he sleeps helps. But it is hard.

Right. The 'in pain' theory I can get thoroughly checked at the vet.

Misjudged playfighting, possibly. But it's a hell of a misjudgement. He bit through to muscle earlier this year. His ears go down and he strikes. He's jumpy generally. You're never quite sure with him.

Weary wave to fellow hell-cat owner Keira. It is hard, isn't it. And yes, if he were a dog he wouldn't still be here. I think about that sometimes and question the logic.

I wonder if there's some sort of cat-calming medicine that will take him down a notch or three. For his sake, as well as ours.

What food is he on?

We have what was a feral kitten.

She wouldn't go outside at first, seemed petrified that she wouldn't get back in. Hates being picked up, has to be held close or she panics. Worming is a nightmare (I'd rather worm the whappy horse!). She's scared of doorways, won't go through if someone is stood there. And she'll only be stroked for a short period without getting stressed.

I am a vet who owners a similar cat. I use a good that contains l-tryptophan and I previously use a feliway plugin though I have recently switched to pet remedy with valerian in it.
I am very good at recognising the signs now, but he is 11 years old. Any pain does make him worse he had his teeth done last year and had three extractions and he has been a lot better since then.
Honestly you learn how to manage these cats rather than anything else.

Sorry, pressed post too soon!

We've adjusted what and how we do things to keep her stress levels down.

She has a routine, i.e. when she goes out (limited), doorways (we step bavk and give her space), attention (short periods of stroking and no picking up unless strictly necessary).

There's calmer for horses so hopefully there's something for cats that'll help your lad.

Our old boy was like this. He'd been badly abused as a kitten and never quite got over it. Feliway is good and I'm interested to hear about Trypotan. He just generally mellowed but could be an absolute horror when he was younger.

Have you tried foods (more £££) which don't have unnecessary additives - James Wellbeloved suited him.

I sobbed when he had to be pts.

Our old cat was very affectionate unless his stomach was stroked, when he would become aggressive. He had an undiscovered injury which was revealed in an X-ray. Haven’t RTWT but try that with your cat?

Per remedy and zyklene are also quite effective.

My cat who had been lovely until then,bit me one morning. I had to have antibiotics as it was infected. Shortly afterwards, I mean days after, he started to have uncontrollable seizures. We had to have him pts as it was so awful for him. I think he felt unwell, I touched him on a way that hurt and he lashed out. I think your kitty possibly feels unwell but clearly can't tell you.

My older cat is like this - I got her when she was 2 and she is now 12-ish and has got no better or no worse during the 10 years. I was told that she'd been re-homed because her owners had a toddler with autism, and she couldn't cope, and indeed high-pitched noises do wind her up (she has attacked me on several occasions when I've been crying..). But she also head-butts, asks for strokes and then at a point with absolutely no warning - bites and scratches hard! She was also so aggressive at the vet recently that they refused to handle her.

I do think she''s very insecure - she does a lot of scent-marking (rubbing her head endlessly against furniture, doorframe and so on) - and she's also a total coward - she growls at the kitten I introduced 6 months ago but always gives ground. However, she also follows me to bed every night and is waiting for me to wake up every morning, and purrs whenever she sees me. I'd never give her up, but I do warn visitors to avoid. She only eats James Wellbeloved, and I have tried feliway in the past and I noticed no difference at all.

I know this thread is a couple of days old but it’s heart warming to see people persevering with difficult cats.

I had a couple of otherwise affectionate cats who would viciously lash out sometimes, but there would always be very subtle signs beforehand. So it could be avoided if you were perceptive to their individual warning signs.

A couple of years ago I became aware of a young cat in a horrendous situation. Managed to get her out, never intending to keep her. She was so traumatised and vicious that I couldn’t let her go. She would need a very, very special home and would no doubt have been returned countless times or euthanised.

I don’t actively reach to stroke her, I let her choose when and how she is touched. Also present two fingers instead of a whole hand which can be too stimulating for sensitive cats. If she jumps on my lap my hands are tucked away out of sight lest they be savaged!

It’s so sad because she so clearly wants to be loved but her past has left her with major issues.

Watch Jackson Galaxy on YouTube. He’s excellent at teaching how to live with cats with issues.

Get pet rescue remedy and put a drop on each ear tip.