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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

She is driving me mad!!

20 replies

HarrietKettleWasHere · 09/04/2018 04:53

Rescue cat, had her a few months, no problems until about a month or so ago.

As you can see it's the crack of bloody dawn and I've been up twice already for the cat. I wake up for work at 6 for a twelve hour day- my sleep is precious Sad

The cat seems to hate being alone at night, she's ok for a bit, but then will seek me out and cry and cry like a baby until I give her belly rubs and lots of fuss. If I let her in the bedroom she will wake me up. I tried shutting her downstairs but she will actually headbut the door until I think she might hurt herself and I go down for her.

I think she might be under stimulated generally- she has never shown any interest in going outside, i don't think she was ever an outdoor cat wherever she was before. I've tried new toys, change of diet... she woke me up at 4 and I'm currently on the sofa with her so she doesn't wake up the rest of the house. She's fast asleep having got her preferred human to come and sit with her Angry

I'm going to be so exhausted at work today and I've never had this problem with any cat I've owned before.

Any ideas please?

OP posts:
chickhonhoneybabe · 09/04/2018 05:16

I’ve no words of wisdom I’m afraid.

Mine have access to my bedroom, boy cat sleeps on the bed all night and girl cat comes in periodically through the night.

I’ve been awake for an hour as boy cat decided that he wanted feeding...

His trick to get my out of bed is to scratch (well claw) at my bedroom curtains, then if that doesn’t work he starts trying to open my bedroom drawers and he isn’t exactly quiet about that...

He’s ok after being fed, then goes back to sleep at the end of the bed.

Then a few hours after that girl cat comes to bed, purring her head off, rubbing her face against mine and wanting stroking. It’s cute but annoying at the same time! 🤣

Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 09/04/2018 05:56

😫 so I have to get used to it for the next ten+ years?!

She has such a plaintive wail as well, goes right through you in the small hours

OP posts:
NotMaryWhitehouse · 09/04/2018 06:58

Get another cat! Sounds ridiculous but they will entertain each other AND wear each other out, plus if they need cuddles, they have each other.

Being nocturnal, cats will ALWAYS be irritating in the night- the thing that is the most adorable thing you have ever seen during the afternoon will make you want to boot them up the backside (lovingly) in the middle of the night!

Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 09/04/2018 07:05

I did think that might be the answer but DP thinks it's mad since we're having so much trouble with this one!

I can't help but think that if she had more of a 'life outside the home' i.e. at least entertain the idea of going in the garden she might be a bit more entertained. Hmm. I would really have to persuade DP on the other cat thing but itd certainly make sense if all she's craving as company.

I love her obviously but at 4 and again at 5 this morning I'd have merrily skinned her and worn her as a pelt Blush

OP posts:
OnTopOfSpaghetti · 09/04/2018 07:08

I had this with my girl rescue cat initially. My cats are kept downstairs overnight, they have the run of the large lounge and kitchen, litter trays, water, toys. My sleep is too precious for a cat to disturb (and I love my cats very much!)
So basically I had to train her out of it. She would scratch, claw, bang at the lounge door from 4 am. I used to drag a big heavy chair in front of the door, block up the gap in the door with blu tack so it wouldn't rattle, give both cats some biscuits at 10pm just before I went to bed, and basically ignored any noises until I got up at 6 am.
It took a couple of weeks but she's completely settled in her routine now. She's always there at the door at 6am waiting but she doesn't disturb us any more.
Just be consistent and firm, stick to a routine and she'll get the hang of it eventually.
Good luck.

Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 09/04/2018 07:11

It does sound like I need to be firmer. DP would never go down to her, I always do as I can hear her slamming against the door. Then she rolls around like butter wouldn't melt wanting belly rubs Angry maybe I could cushion the door somehow. I feel bad though as she doesn't have a lot of space downstairs really as has to be shut in the living room, no door to stairs. She has very little interest in toys or her scratching posts.

OP posts:
RickOShay · 09/04/2018 07:15

I think spaghetti is probably right.

Difficult situation though. Perhaps if you put a duvet up against the door she couldn’t hurt herself.

OnTopOfSpaghetti · 09/04/2018 07:33

It is learned behaviour to a certain extent, she makes a huge racket and gets rewarded with cuddles! You do need to be firm, and don't feel bad about the space she's in, she won't come to any harm. Think about the little pens they are kept in at rescue centres, sometimes for weeks on endSad You are giving her so much more than that. Stay strong OP!

Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 09/04/2018 08:40

Thanks Spaghetti! Will see how the barricade holds tonight....

OP posts:
RickOShay · 09/04/2018 08:43

Harriet good luck Flowers

Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 09/04/2018 08:47

Thanks Rick! Have to work through the guilt and remind myself she has a perfectly nice life...she was stuck in rescue for about a year after she got dumped there by some students at the end of their degrees.

OP posts:
OnTopOfSpaghetti · 09/04/2018 09:25

Oh bless her. Well then, just remind yourself how much better her life is now! Plenty of fuss in the day, but ignore at night. You can do it! Smile

Wolfiefan · 09/04/2018 09:27

We got our first cats before we married. Both would try and get us up at ungodly hours. I refused. DH didn't.
For the next 17 years he was the one they woke. I slept soundly. Grin

Toddlerteaplease · 09/04/2018 10:23

Mine settled down after a few months. Now they just seem to sense when I'm stirring and come for a snuggle. They no longer actively try to wake me up. Now it's warmer they aren't coming up as much anyway. I love having them snuggled next to me. I feel your pain op. As I do 12 hour shifts as well.
I thought my sister was being mean at banning my parents Cat from the room when she stays with them. Till I stayed over! He slept, I didn't!!

RickOShay · 10/04/2018 08:52

Hope it went ok Smile

Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 10/04/2018 15:07

Thanks! I got her a ball with a bell thing and got her to do laps up and down the hallway to try and wear her out before he'd- she won't play by herself Grin I didn't shut her in the living room but I did barricade my bedroom door and resolved to ignore her. To be fair she didn't come up and start mewling until 5:30am (still hideous but an improvement!!) but I didn't come out and after a bit of scratching at the door gave up again until I got up at 6:15.

So hopefully we'll get there. I do wonder if she'd benefit by going outside though, even if it's just out on the patio.

OP posts:
Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 10/04/2018 15:08

He'd= bed!

OP posts:
RickOShay · 10/04/2018 18:55

I think she probably would. I notice the difference in the cats if they have been inside due to the rain, apart from quick dashes to the loo Grin, they are more frisky of an evening. If possible I would let her out for a bit.
But it sounds like it’s the beginning of the endGrin

Original poster
HarrietKettleWasHere · 10/04/2018 19:49

She can go out- but she just won't. I don't know if she knows what the outside is. Now the weather's maybe going to get a bit nicer I might try and have her out with me in the evenings for a bit. Kitten steps Grin

OP posts:
RickOShay · 10/04/2018 21:04

Yes that’s what i did, i sat on a cushion on the step with them, it was lovely watching them discover the world

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