How long for cat to settle after marriage breakdown?

[CatLadyToddlerMother]

I have a 5 year old female cat. She's an only cat and was bought a present by my then husband in 2016 for Valentines Day (we'd discussed getting a cat and the work involved before etc I've had cats all my life). She's indoor only by choice - if I leave doors/windows open she sticks her head pout then turns round and comes back.

My husband lived in the house for 10days without us and then he moved out and me and my daughter (2.9) moved back in. Nothing has really changed apart from my husband isn't here anymore.

But Cats behaviour is really odd. She's always been skittish/a bit scared of people. But now she's scratching furniture (she has a scratching board nailed to the hallway wall, and scratching post in the living room), following me round, has bitten my daughter unprovoked twice and is just generally not herself.

I've taken her to the vet who said she's fine physically, and he also flead and wormed her (she gets done every 3 months with stuff from the vets anyway) and clipped her claws so they're shorter. He said her behaviour is due to the change in home set up.

What's worrying me is how long I can expect this behaviour to last or is it permanent? She's generally a loving cat, and I missed her so much when I wasn't here, so I don't want to have to rehome her but if the biting and scratching carries on I might have to. We've been back 1.5 weeks now.

How long should I leave it? And is there anything I can get to calm her? I'm not going to leave her, she's my 2nd baby (after DD) and DD is gentle with her (no fur pulling, hitting etc. she literally just strokes her and sings to her (no idea why she sings to the cat!))

Did your vet not recommend anything calming? I'd recommend Zylkene to be added to her food (it's a calming supplement, not a medication), Feliway or Pet Remedy plug-ins and spray around the house, and maybe play with her more to give her an outlet for her energy & something fun to do with you.

She's probably picking up on the change and upheaval as you say, and cats pick up on their owners' stress too.

You can give her zylkene tablets from pets at home or online. They’re very calming.

No vet didn't give me anything!

I'll try playing with her more, my DD will enjoy that too. Will have a look in pets at home for those tablets to calm her and also order a plug in.

Thank you

Cat has now stopped eating hasn't eaten since yesterday morning. No idea why I've not changed her food at all.

Vet says if she's not eaten by tomorrow morning he wants to see her again. Any ideas? She's a fussy cat as it is, hates fish, will only eat fresh roast chicken if she has to, will eat chicken cat food but only one specific brand.

Have you got a chicken?

Try a Feliway diffuser. It was really effective when my cat was freaked out by a strange cat coming in through our cat flap.

Fluffy I have some chicken breasts in the freezer.

I have a feliway plug-in but I might need to get another one as I only have the one next to her food bowl, where else should I put them?

I believe they recommend putting the Feliway in a place where they spend a lot of time. Ours was as close as possible to 'his' spot on the sofa.

Might you be pregnant?

It sounds like she is ill. I have had cats my whole life, and yes they pick up on the atmosphere in a house to some extent, but I have never seen one seriously bothered by one person's absence. Not eating sounds like there might be something else going on.

If she is an indoor cat, why does she need flea and worm treatments?

I don’t think I’m pregnant. I better not be!

Vet recommended to flea and worm her even though she’s an indoor cat because we had a really bad flea infestation a few years ago, no idea how it started or where they came from but I’m scared of it happening again so do her regularly.

I’ll get another 2 plug ins, one for my living room and one for in my DDs room which are the two rooms she spends the most time in.

Did she eat the chicken?

Hope she seems happier soon

My cat reacted and took a month or so to settle again. My ex visited about a month after that and the cat was so excited to see him. It was really upsetting.

I do hope she is better soon.

She's eaten a tiny bit of the chicken overnight but has turned her nose up at more and wouldn't eat the cat food I offered either.

Vet still wants to see her but thinks as she's eating a little bit she's not actually ill.

Got her eating again!

No idea why but I gave her half a pouch instead of a full one today, she ate it slowly (took about 30 mins) but it's something. I'll give her the rest before I go out at 10am and then split the 2nd pouch of the day across two meals. It's a bit less than I usually give her (usually she has 3 pouches a day) but she's at least eating we can build up the amount another time. She's a lot calmer as well now she's eaten something.

Thank you everyone for your advise. So glad she's going to be ok.

Really great news
Hope she continues, you definitely need good news