Please help, re mother-in-law's poor cat 😥

[EspressoPatronum]

Please be gentle, this is a horrible situation on all counts.

My lovely mother in law has a much loved cat who is around 14 or so years old (I'm not sure exactly how old she is). The cat is very anxious, I think she was the smallest in a litter and had some sort of fright before mil got her, but I don't know the details and mil can't tell us anything much anymore...

The cat is on waiting lists at a few no kill shelters as unfortunately mil has Alzheimer's and vascular dementia and will get to the point where she can't care for the cat. We considered taking the cat in ourselves but she has never been in happy around dp (mil got the cat after he had moved out for uni, and him being around causes the cat to become stressed and at times aggressive. We think it might be a problem with men in general, related to whatever happened before mil got her, but as dp is the only man cat has been around we can't be sure and mil can't remember) and adding our overly friendly toddler to the mix don't think we are the best home for her.

This was hard enough, but on Friday mil fell down some steps and has broken her leg. We have spent the weekend with her (a 2 hour drive) and she is in a leg cast which she needs to wear for 7 weeks at least and may need surgery to pin it.

Obviously she can't stay at home alone, so she is going today to stay with her brother 40 minutes away.

Meaning the cat will be left alone 😥 I am planning on driving to mil's on my days off from work to change the cat litter, top up dry food, change water etc but obviously this isn't adequate. Mil won't allow anyone she doesn't know into her house (anxiety linked to her health problems) so a cat sitter etc isn't doable as we're not willing to overrule her about her own home, as frustrating as it is. Her brother that she is staying with can't help as he has no car and lives in a very rural area with no public transport to anywhere near mil's house...

We are at a loss. I feel dreadful for the poor cat all alone most days and feel that we need to re-home her much sooner than we originally planned but the shelters she is on the list for are obviously full.

Does anyone have a magic wand they can wave? 😞😞

Ask the vets to put her on their rehoming page on Facebook if they have one.Also put a plea out on the lost and found pets group for your city asking for a rescue or checked fosterer to come forward(lots will look on this site). Also theres the Cats in Danger group on Facebook they might be able to help you.
I think you will be able to sort her out but your going to have to really be persistent.Also say you will offer some financial help regarding making sure her injections etc are upto date.
Also I'd be asking a cat sitter or trusted neighbour to help in the meantime.

Dementia is a cruel and terrible thing. So sorry OP.
Another plug for the Cinnamon Trust! They're awesome. May be able to help with feeding and litter tray if not foster. (And they do permanent foster too!)

Have any of her neighbours got teenagers? I would pay one of them £20 a week to feed the cat morning and evening. It's easy money for them and would only take a few minutes.

I can't hear the words CPL without thinking about this really funny poem they commissioned:

Sorry, wrong thread!

Just an update in case anyone was interested, we have managed to find a neighbor who is willing to take on the cat, potentially for the long term. I went yesterday to take her round and though she is hiding , she came out to eat and no aggression so far, so fingers crossed... thanks again for all your help.

Oh I do hope it works out. It is very common for them to hide at first. Hope she settles soon.

Glad you have found somewhere for her, she'll be alright.

Might be worth buying the neighbour a bottle of felliway for the cat. It worked wonders with my rescue. Glad you've got it sorted x

I’m so glad it’s worked out.

When George moved in with the neighbour he was nervous at first but he soon settled down. When I went in to see him a few weeks later he’d obviously forgotten about me as he hissed at me!

I’m sure she’ll settle soon.

Hope it works out for you all! My mother-in-law died so we've moved back in with father-in-law for the short term. He doesn't like cats so our kitten has had to stay in our bedroom with us. We were sceptical it would work at first but it's been going ok. Hoping to persuade FIL that a cat companion would be good for him but he remains unpersuaded!

That's fantastic

Poor cat, it's not good for them to be alone, especially one presumably used to MIL being in most of the time. Please don't have her PTS . 14 isn't that old. Someone will want her and give her a safe loving home for potentially several years. Madam BrokenCat is 10/ 11 and still zooms around crazily, hunts and plays when in the mood. Could you call the shelters she's on the waiting list for and explain things have become more urgent? I know Cats Protection have foster carers, Madam was with one. I think until she can be rehomed you should get a catsitter - and not tell MIL. Normally I wouldn't advise lying or allowing someone into someone else's home when they aren't comfortable with that, but in this situation with someone who has dementia so will never know...difficult though

Oh sorry didn't rtft, that's great

That's brilliant tcn Madam is quite nervy but I suspect can take care of herself when needed

Neighbours usually are your best bet as it's same area and sometimes even shy cat's have two homes

Hi, not sure if you are still looking for advice. I’m not sure where you live (I am in Scotland). However there are a few charities Which do pet fostering. Sometimes people want to help pets in their time of need without committing long term. The cat would just stay with someone until you mother in law came out of hospital. Just a regular person and the charity would arrange it. As I say I’m not sure where you are but give it a wee google. Also, don’t be scared to phone the rescues back and explain your situation, they might have an emergency foster in the back ground, you never know! If they say no then then they said no. what is the harm? At least you tried. Also ring round some vets see if they know of anyone who could help. You are doing your best in a very difficult situation, hope you manage to find her something and your mother in law recovers quickly, best of luck

I am so glad you have what sounds like a good solution. Fingers crossed it all goes well with the neighbour.