Hi all,
Dramatic title but I'm feeling very sensitive about this! We have three cats, one of which we rescued last year. The rescue cat had settled well and is much loved and cared for - important to the issue. We nursed her back to health.
About 2 months ago she started going out all day and then this built to only coming back at night and then to being away for a couple of days at a time , all very out of character. A neighbour spotted her leaving another neighbour's house so we went to him directly and asked what was happening. Long story short - he leaves cat food in his garden and doesn't see the issue with letting our cat in his house. To the point he has a litter tray for her and has been locking her in!! This time we havent seen her for a week.
We explained she is our cat and we missed her, wrote letters and DH has even asked to go in and get her from the house a few times. He genuinely thinks he's helping and doesn't see how hurtful it is no matter how much we explain.
It's now at a point where locking her in for a few hours doesn't work and she just returns to his. I've tried treats etc all to no avail.
We've just locked her in the house with us again but I know when I let her out she'll just go there. She's put on far too much weight so I'm wondering if he's just giving her rubbish and she likes that.
Any ideas other than trying to keep her as a house cat?! Or accepting she prefers him 
TIA - sorry it's so Long!