Please tell me what to do (and let me sob on your shoulder)

[RoseCuntedGlasses]

I would link to my old thread but I'm not having much luck today and would probably end up posting something completely random.

In summary, my lovely ginger boy has a large, fast growing tumour between his shoulder blades.

We had a referral to a specialist vet this morning. The oncologist has told us that chemo or radiotherapy wouldn't work for this tumour. The only option is surgery.

We met with the surgeon. The procedure is major, major surgery. There needs to be a 5cm area taken away all round the tumour. He'd be looking at having a section almost as big as my spread hand taken away. He's not that big of a cat! He'd also have to have sections of his vertebrae removed.

After this is done, he would have to stay in a smallish crate to minimise his movement, because that could impact on the healing of this huge wound.

There's a good chance, even after all that, that it could come back.

He's insured, but from having various procedures this year, there's only about 1k of his 4k allowance left. The operation would cost between 4-5k, an MRI beforehand would be another 1k. It would wipe us out. His insurance doesn't start again until January.

I don't know what to do. I can't think straight to be honest. I have three other cats and they are all my babies. I don't know what to do and I'm so sad.

I don't want him to spend his last days/weeks/months in pain, stuck in a crate recovering from a massive operation that could be for nothing. But the idea of just shrugging and saying that we'll do nothing, just leave it, seems horrific and impossible.

Thanks for reading if you got to the bottom of that. Any advice would be gratefully received.

So sorry to read this Rose. How old is he? Is he currently suffering?

My elderly boy (16), was diagnosed with an in operable stomach mass about four months ago and is asymptomatic. When he is in discomfort we will have him PTS. At the moment he has a really good quality of life and is very happy with himself.

My honest view is that I think if I was in your position I would have him PTS. It sounds like a very challenging and unpleasant procedure that may not even save him. I'm so sorry for you because things are so heartbreaking. If he is not currently in pain then maybe it wouldn't need to be done straight away perhaps?

I once left a cat longer than I should without PTS because I couldn't bear to say goodbye and I know he suffered because of that decision and I'm sorry I wasn't braver. I won't do the same again with my old boy.

Better a week too soon than a day too late

Ignoring the financial aspect completely and to a small degree depending on his age, my first reaction would be that it may well be time to say goodbye to him depending on the prognosis for the surgery.

I know that sounds blunt, but you have to bear in mind that spinal surgery in itself is extremely high risk even for specialists like the Supervet Noel FitzPatrick, and can lead to complications of it's own apart from the cancer. Then you have to factor in his quality of life both after surgery and going forwards even if the cancer doesn't return.

I'm not in any way suggesting that you would be just shrugging it away, but it could well be the kindest thing you can do for him in the long run.

Thanks both 😢 I know exactly what you mean Pennina, about needing to be braver, and better too soon than too late. And yes, Allergic, when he mentioned cutting away bits of bone my heart almost stopped. It's too much. He's 11/12 by the way. He was a stray that found us when he was quite little and made himself at home.

He's not in any pain at the moment, he's loving his special tuna treats and all the fuss he's getting. I just have to put his best interests first.

So sorry about your Dcat.

I think in your shoes I'd be reluctant to go through such a major operation with him (ignoring the cost) purely because it sounds a horrible experience for him. Hugs for you and your cat.

So sorry. I think if it was my boy, I'd not put him through surgery. Just spoil and love him till it's time. Hugs

I'm so so sorry. Of course you can have a shoulder. I would happily go for surgery but my concern here would be that he could undergo surgery and a stressful recovery only to relapse. That would just be awful. What does your vet suggest?

Ah so horrible to have to deal with this, I really feel for you.
I would probably leave him whilst he's not in pain. Speak with the surgeon & see what would be the risk of a watch & wait approach whilst he's in no pain now. This might tide you over to use the insurance allowance in August on the scan, and if he is deteriorating or in pain by September, look at using next years insurance allowance for the op, if you feel that's an option.
Just don't rush into any decisions. Poor little thing.

I have to echo what PPs have said. It just sounds like too much for him - and you - to go through. So sorry that you are facing such a difficult decision

Hi Rose, I remember your other thread & was wondering how things were going. Thanks so much for the update (even though it's sad).
If I'm being really honest, in your cat's situation I would probably not go for the op. I would try to give him a great quality of life for as long as reasonably possible and then make a decision to PTS in a planned, peaceful way before any crisis point had been reached.

Cats won't have an understanding of going through painful unpleasant treatment & putting up with it for the end goal of feeling better; they live in the moment & their immediate quality of life is so important to them.

I have never had your really hard situation to deal with but I had an elderly cat with tongue cancer a few years ago and the prognosis was hopeless, months at best (turned out to be a few weeks). My vet gave him regular steroid tablets just to keep swelling etc down and to "perk him up" a bit, & we had a few good weeks with him. Once it was clear that he was starting to struggle to eat I phoned the vet & he was PTS after a weekend of lots of fuss & lying in the sun. I don't know if steroids could be considered for palliative care for your boy?

Massive sympathies for you and for the decisions you have to make

Has your vet said what he would personally do in this circumstance? I'm just worried about the size of the area that would be taken away, but if that's fine and he has a high chance of recovery then I'd go for it.

If the changes are 50/50 or he will end up in lots of pain then I would prepare to say goodbye.

*chances

I'm really sorry you are having to face this. My own feeling is that I couldn't put him through that and hard though it is I would say goodbye. It's a horrible decision to have to make though

We're facing a similar situation with our lovely (shortly older) cat. Its hard, but I personally feel it's about what's right for the pet. If you're looking at major surgery with no definite outcomes and a long recovery time vs a comfortable rest of what he has left, then you're not doing 'nothing', you're doing what is right for your lovely boy. Good luck with your decision.

I would love, him spoil him rotten, and when he shows signs of discomfort, then I would say goodbye and have him PTS.
It just sounds such a massive, invasive op, and the recovery in a crate is very hard for a cat with an uncertain prognosis.

I kept my boy alive too long because I couldn't bear to part with him, and I would never make that mistake again xx

Rose this is an awful situation to be in.
I think it's time to think of your cat's perspective. The op would most likely overwhelm him physically and mentally and his quality of life is not guaranteed. He would go through so much trauma without anyway of you explaining it to him. He may pass away in discomfort along the way or have a minor recovery only to become ill again through secondary issues, due to op, or spreading tumours.
I would say it's time to let him go with cat dignity, but it's harder as you obviously love your cat. Best wishes.

What an awful dilemma for you. If you had spare funds, do you think you'd opt for the operation or not? My first cat became seriously ill with breast tumours and had an operation that wrecked her life. I wish I hadn't put her through it & I swore I'd never do it again. It's a very difficult time for you.

Is it a fibrosarcoma, OP? My cat had one between her shoulder blades at the same age as yours. She's a petite tortie.

It was removed, she recovered well, then it returned a month later. It was removed again, the surgery went well although the wound took longer to heal as there hadn't been enough time for the skin to grow back. That was four years ago and she's been in brilliant health ever since.

@RoseCuntedGlasses

Is this an injection site sarcoma?

If so we had one removed from our gorgeous ginger boy aged 11. His operation was a complete success and curative! His recovery was much, much faster than I'd have expected and within weeks he was back to jumping on top of wardrobes.

The initial few days were tough but he was on strong painkillers.

We were so proud and in awe of him.

If we had the same cancer in one of our other cats we would do the surgery again. Yes it is very invasive in terms of removing bone to achieve good margins but our lovely boy regained an excellent quality of life. Happy to recommend the surgeon and specialist vets we used.

I'm sorry Rose, I remember your other thread about your poorly boy.

I've always said that in a similar situation I'd opt for palliative treatment only, even though it would break my heart. Mainly because, like other posters have said, cats live in the moment and there's no way to explain to them that we're doing this with their best interests at heart.

Have a chat with your vet to ensure everything is clear in your mind. If I remember rightly, he's had masses removed/investigated before?

I really am sorry that you're faced with this painful decision.

@RoseCuntedGlasses - I am so sorry. I hope your boy is doing OK at the moment.

This may be too late for you, but just wanted to post about my similar experience in the hope it helps you / other people. My cat (about 14) had a fibrosarcoma which was removed but came back about 4-5 months later. She then had a bigger operation and so far (fingers crossed) it has not come back but I understand that it may very well do so in future. Her second operation was quite traumatic for both of us - an area about a quarter the size of your description was removed and the wound opened up so she needed to spend a couple of weeks in a collar and under supervision at the vet. She hated it because she is very nervous and obviously desperately wanted to come back with me when I visited her every day. After that I decided that I would not put her through any more operations. Having said that, she is doing brilliantly a few months on and doesn't seem in any way traumatised by the experience.

It is a really hard decision for you. If money were no object and it were a less invasive procedure then I would be tempted to go through one operation and see how long it really takes to grow back. Cats do recover from a difficult experience even though it is absolutely awful to see them suffering as it heals. However, having seen how difficult it was for my cat to go through a comparatively much smaller operation, I think that it makes it a very difficult decision for you. It may be that it is time to make a huge fuss of him and let him have an incredibly happy time with you for the next few months.

I am sure he has a lovely life with you. I am sorry.

Ps whatever you decide (or have decided) please, please don't feel guilty about it. There is no right answer and there are risks involved in either decision. The only thing you should focus on is what a very happy life you have given him.