New Cat / Kitten. Recommendations.

[SpaghettiMeatballs]

I was given two rescue cats 12 years ago. The female died two years ago and the male last autumn. My girl died suddenly (a stroke type thing I think) in my arms but my boy was poorly for a long time and in the end he had to be PTS. The whole experience was awful and until now I haven't been able to think about another cat.

DS was playing with a friend's guinea pig today. He was so gentle with it and he suddenly said 'my cat is in heaven. He's gone but I want him back' and I just suddenly felt it was time to get a new cat. He just sounded so sad and I felt selfish for not getting another pet.

I fell into having my previous two cats. I've never planned getting a cat before if that makes sense?

I don't know if I should be thinking of a cat or a kitten or if I should consider a particular breed or sex.

DS is 3 and DD is 5. The DCs love animals, especially DS but I obviously need a child friendly cat. Luckily my previous cats were very good when the DCs arrived.

I think I'm quite attracted to a kitten because it likely means not having to deal with the end of life decisions for a very long time and I like the idea of my DCs watching a kitten grow.

There are probably a zillion things I'm not taking into account here. WWYD in my circumstances?

I'd get a youngish adult cat. You'll have a clear idea of temperament that way. Kittens bite and scratch and your DC are still quite little. When I was growing up we had a number of cats, all from kittens and some did not end up being child-friendly at all. My rescue cat is a really chilled out little thing. I'll only ever get adult cats in future as I now know how much less hassle they are compared to kittens.

When my children were 9 and 3 we adopted 3 kittens at 10 weeks old. I knew the breeder well and knew the kittens had been handled and looked after well. My boys are gentle souls and I had no worries about trusting them with the kittens. It's worked out great! Obviously the kittens did scratch a little at first but we'd read the books together and learned how to respond.
Our cats are now over a year old and very loving, never bite or scratch.
Our research had told us that we should adopt more than one kitten as they then play and roughhouse with each other and therefore learn boundaries better.

I would get a rescue cat. I think that an adult cat is safer because you know what their personality already is. Kittens are cute but a PITA (IMO).

We adopted a 5 year old from Battersea late last year, after the death of our 20 year old.

There's so many cats in rescues I think that you have to get one from there.
I think a young adult cat will be perfect and should enjoy lots of years of healthy life, esp as they are health checked at the rescue.

Yes get an adult from a rescue where temperament is known. Adults get stuck in rescues for longer at this time of year.
And when you acquire said kitty we need photos

I had a kitten as a child and my niece got one last year so I guess am thinking back to then. You are right that predicting temperament is a good point to take into account. It didn't occur to me to get a kitten before especially when I heard my two needed to be rehomed together and I was in a position to accommodate that.

I might make some enquiries with charities. We have two long weekends away back to back at the end of the month so I'll be thinking of June which will give time for home checks and finding a suitable cat.

We have RSPCA and Cats Protection here. My last two were Cats Protection.

I'm sure I can arrange that vino. I didn't have an issue showing my cats off for all to admire before!

We got an older kitten and his (young) Mum from CPL in October, the kitten was about 5 months old and his Mum just under a year. This has worked really well, they're both lively and engaged but were housetrained and neutered and a little less manic than teeny tiny kittens.

The kitten is a bit bitey but leaves DD (7) alone, the Mum is a bit aloof but very curious and as they're Mum & Son they have a good relationship with each other.

The CPL lady was great and was able to give us a really good history so knew they'd be ok with DD etc. Good luck!

Not a kitten and a three year old. Kittens bite and scratch. Even my teenager ended up in tears at one point. (They were torties though!)
Our first cats were mum 2 years old and her son 18 months. (yes she had kittens at 6 months old!)
They were rescues. Settled well. No biting or scratching. Still young enough to be playful. She lived until 19 so we had 17 years with her.

Agree that an adult rescue is the way forward. Rescues assess their adult cats for temperament and will be able to point you towards ones that would be happy in your family.