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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

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Original poster

Cats are miserable since baby :(

10 replies

owl89 · 10/08/2016 09:41

I have 2 gorgeous and loving boy cats who have become miserable since my baby was born. Before I has DS they spent all their time cuddling me and sleeping in bed with me but since my baby was born they have become miserable, trying to escape outside (they are indoor and previously never tried to get out) and quite twitchy. One has even started being sick. I am devastated.

I really don't know how to help them. I try and give them extra love and fuss them as much as possible but they are still miserable. When I found out I was pregnant I had visions of my baby and cats growing up together as best friends but it's just not happening. I don't know what to do. I don't really know what my question is, I just need to get this out and see if anybody has experienced the same or has some advice.

OP posts:

sashh · 10/08/2016 10:09

Feliway?

Original poster

owl89 · 10/08/2016 10:11

We have used Feliway before and it was great but it's not working for this.

OP posts:

LumpySpacedPrincess · 10/08/2016 10:13

They will get used to it, they really will. I watched our cats develop amazing relationships with my daughter, even though they hated the disruption and noise to start with. They are obviously stressed but will adjust.

HermioneJeanGranger · 10/08/2016 10:36

It sounds like they're really stressed.

Can you create a space for them away from baby? They're used to having their own space and now they have a tiny screaming baby to deal with and their humans are suddenly not as interested in them anymore. It must be quite confusing for them.

But they will adapt. Especially as baby grows up and can interact with them. But in the meantime, you need to give them some cat-only space, I think. And lots of high-up spots they can escape to when they're upset - a cat tree, maybe?

Toddlerteaplease · 10/08/2016 12:01

Zykelene?

spacefrog35 · 10/08/2016 12:09

My elderly girl is the same. The vet has given her some hormone based anti depressants, absolutely bloody brilliant, worked almost instantly.

crayfish · 10/08/2016 12:59

How old is the baby?

Honestly it does get better. I also have two indoor boy cats who were utterly spolied rotten when my DS arrived last year. They had had six years of being the most important things in my life (bar DH) and now they weren't. They also weren't allowed in my bedroom anymore because of DS's cot and to be honest, I largely ignored them other than the usual feeding/litter tray stuff for the first few weeks while I was getting used to the new baby. They both sulked and were quite miserable and I felt awful.

Fast forward to when DS was a couple of months old and we were all a bit more in the swing of things, I found I really reconnected with the cats. especially in the evenings when DS was asleep and they came to snuggle with me on the sofa and things. Now DS is one and they are still totally spoiled and everything is back to normal for them. They are still not allowed upstairs but we have built them an outside run which they love (would really recommend this if you have the room).

They don't like DS by the way, never have, but he worships them and follows them around while they try to ignore him. They aren't scared of him or anything, they just can't figure him out! I'm hoping they become friends one day.

So the point of all that was, give it time. And don't feel too guilty, they are your first love and always will be but they need to make room for the baby and you need to be ok with that.

Fluffycloudland77 · 10/08/2016 13:16

I'd try the zylkene TBH.

TroysMammy · 10/08/2016 18:39

It will get better. My sister's cat, her baby for 13 years was really put out when she brought a human baby home which had to stay. Eventually puss came around and he and little one became best buddies. He sadly died when he was about 19 and my niece was 5.

GetTheVolvoVal · 15/08/2016 19:28

Following with interest as I'm in the same situation. I have 2 cats that were rescues as kittens (boy and girl). Girl cat has always been very timid and a lap cat. She's so stressed since DD arrived 7 months ago. She's spraying in every room of the house including all over DDs various bottle making equipment which was the final straw for me.
On vets advice we have tried some environmental changes and feliway with no results and started zylkene a week ago and desperately hoping it works but even our vet has said the kindest thing may be a new home. Boy cat not affected.
She's on the waiting list at a rehoming centre I feel like one of 'those' people who ditch their pet when their baby arrives but we're running out of options.

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