Ways your evil overlord finds to punish you for misdemeanors

[LemonRedwood]

His highness likes to hunt. His previous owner claimed he never brought anything in, but it turns out he is quite proficient and likes to give gifts. Mostly left on the doormat so they greet me as I get in from work. He has also attempted to redecorate the hallway a fetching shade of red (I'm not sure "mouse blood" is a colour on many paint charts).

Anyway, as a result of this, I have now put a massive great big unobtrusive but effective bell on his collar.

His highness is displeased.

I know this because he has a new way of waking me up. Instead of the paw round the face to let me know it's breakfast time, he sits by my head and scratches his neck vigorously so the bell jangles right in my ear. 3 mornings in a row. At roughly 5am.

Git.

Well I've cleaned up poo next to the litter tray tonight but I think that may be because I put the lips around the trays and the 19 year old may have struggled (looks lively enough when dinner is called) to get in the tray, I've stood in puke and wee, both barefooted

Kids have nothing on these lot!

God I feel lucky reading these poo stories.

Problem, I have a "knocking over stuff" cat too. Preferably if it contains liquid. The other breakable, decorative objects, Blu-Tak is my friend. He seems to have a particular hatred for Yankee Candles, and a retro Babycham prancing deer, that sadly has only 3 legs. And don't get me started on the art deco giraffe...

His job title would be "Manager of Breaking Things".

...oh and he really hated my Russian Doll set of the royal family. The queen and prince Harry used to get the most punishment...

My sister has a cat that is slowly destroying her boyfriends awful taste in ornaments

Don't know how he managed to damaged the hall light thought!

The hall light? Unless you're talking about a lamp, it sounds like a bum rap to me! I'd be looking sideways at the boyfriend.

We had one vase. It was so big I honestly thought he couldn't shift it.

After reading these posts, my two are little treasures! most of the time. The fluffy diva sometimes wees on the landing carpet if we have done something to annoy her (the last time it was getting a new bed, two new wardrobes and a chest of drawers at once ), God knows what she will do when we bring a baby home in October. And the other one very very occasionally brings us a mouse or a bird, it's only happened a handful of times in two years. She likes to throw up randomly after food sometimes though, usually on a windowsill. Think that coincides with her having a hairball though

Her graciousness now takes her bathroom breaks outside but while the litter tray was still there and usually unused she had a habit of taking a revenge piss in it when her expectations weren't met.

She really isn't the brightest little button in the box