fed up of my cat :(

[Dieu]

Hello everyone. First time on 'litter tray'.
We have had our rescue cat for 4 years now. For the most part, he's a lovely boy and no bother at all. I must admit that I personally don't really 'get' the joys of cat owning (he is quite aloof and not a lap cat at all!), but he is looked after very well and seems happy. My children in particular adore him.
Since bringing him home from the rescue centre, aged between 1 - 2 years, he has always preferred to go out at night and sleep all day. I've always been a night owl, so would let him out late at night (midnight, 1am) and then we'd find him waiting by the kitchen door at 7am. He'd have his breakfast and then go upstairs to sleep. Job's a good 'un.
Fast forward to the past year, my marriage has broken up and the children and I (and cat!) are now living in a basement flat, all on the one level. This flat I have to say was chosen in part with him in mind, as it would seem cruel for him not to have a garden, and they are rare where we live. It's also a very safe, feline paradise where we are.
It's a nightmare for me, however. He will now think nothing of jumping on our outside windowsills to be let in, at all hours of the night and early morning. He will whine if kept inside, so then needs to be let out. He can be heard wherever he is in the flat, as it's much smaller than the previous family home (and now on one level, as opposed to 3!). It is rare that I will have an undisturbed sleep because of him.
The other thing is that he is food obsessed. He gets given the right amount, probably a bit more, of good quality food but I get bloody fed up of not being able to to go into the kitchen without him following me and moaning for food! He is healthy, so nothing of concern there.
As I said, I am probably not a natural at this and don't find the above particularly endearing! That said, I'm more than happy to admit that I probably haven't done the right things all along, by letting him out at night etc. I just sort of plodded along and did what seemed right for him at the time.
I am committed to him and want things to get better, but do find this affecting how I feel about him.
Any tips? Ignoring him when he's crying to be let in or out is impossible.
Thanks so much.

Any chance of getting a cat flap installed?

What type of food is he having? Could he be thirsty rather than hungry?

Absolutely. You need a cat flap. Even if you are renting it's still quite possible and you just get an extra panel for the door to put the flap in and you can put the original one back when you go.

Sounds like a cat flap would be ideal. I thought you were going to say he's peeing all over.

I don't give into begging so mines given up asking me but will hassle the husband while looking at the treat cupboard.

I think being disturbed is part and parcel of having cats I've come to the conclusion.

Oh, that sounds like a pain.

Have you EVER let him in the window? If so, i'd suggest stopping that, he needs to not have any idea that whining at the window makes a jot of difference and that you can't hear him. Only ever let him come in the designated door.

Thanks so much for all your helpful and supportive replies. I was half expecting a blasting for saying that I'm not really a cat person!
I've thought about a cat flap, but we're in Edinburgh, where mice are rife and I worried about not being able to always see what he brings in. And the flat can be quite chilly, and I was concerned about draughts.
Not to mention the expense, as there always seems to be something else to shell out for in this older property! I think they're bloody ugly too, but it's a no brainer I guess.

Cat flap. Modern ones are not draughty at all. A basic one is cheap to buy and easy to install yourself if it's a wooden door (I've done it). If you can spend the extra get a micro chip operated one (assuming cat is chipped) to prevent unwanted guests. If he hunts then try to have the flap in a room you can close off.

Alternatively lock him in one room overnight, with a tray if he needs one.

The negatives of a cat flap are completely outweighed by the positive ones. Even the non microchip ones are better.

When he whines for food is he usually fed?

Definitely invest in a microchip cat flap - you don't need extra cats to worry about!

Yes, they can and do bring in things - if he's a hunter he will. You sort of learn to deal with it.

Agree, break him of the habit with food, if you stop giving him food when he begs he will eventually stop. Well, not definitely but its worth a try.

Thanks all. I only give him his food and nowt else, which consists of 2 Felix pouches a day, and a good quality dried food in between times. He would whinge for Scotland though, bless him!
I have NEVER seen another cat in our garden, perhaps because we're quite high up off street level at the back. I think a normal cat flap would therefore be okay, and yes, he is microchipped. I shall look into it all, as he is driving me to distraction.

Get a microchip cat flap. Yes, he might bring in a few dead mice but that's part of being a cat owner. As for food - ignore the begging, it will work eventually. Ours get fed morning and night and no longer beg in-between. They used to, but they learnt they'd never get anywhere and gave up. He will learn eventually, you just have to have a bit of a cold heart and ignore the pleas of hunger!

I definitely think a cat flap will really help. We are in a small terrace 2 up, 2 down and we restrict our cat to the kitchen and living room at night so she can't disturb us by scratching at bedroom doors. Is it possible to restrict his nighttime wanderings to outside plus one other room?

Get tough with the scrounging for extra food - ignore, ignore, ignore you will eventually break him of the habit.

our cat has to sleep in the kitchen (with a cat flap) He really disturbs our sleep by jumping on us in the middle of the night. I also don't have to listen to him crunching his mice on the floor next to me!!

Hope you can get this sorted out.

You will miss even the night-crying when he dies, I guarantee it!

Thanks LeftMyRidingCropInTheMortuary, but I honestly wouldn't bet on it!

Does he eat the dried food? If he's not keen then two pouches doesn't sound a lot. (But I've got kittens so what do I know?!)
Our cats stay in at night. That would reduce the hunting.
Are you sure the pestering is for food? Ours often pester for a cuddle, chat etc. I know you say you're not really a cat person but they do need more than food, water and a scamper outside.
Does he have a litter tray? Is he pestering to go out to see?

Wee
Not see!