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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Neighbours have stolen my cat, WWYD?

54 replies

jennieflower · 11/05/2015 19:55

I've had my lovely old cat for 17 years, she's 18 years old. She's a big part of the family and we love her, my 6yo son is very close to her, she goes to sleep on his pillow next to him most evenings, then I put her outside when I go to bed at around midnight. She's never liked being indoors overnight and on the few occasions she's been left in she's weed on things in the house, we have a litter tray but that is used by my indoor cat and she's never really used it.

Over the last few weeks she's been coming home less and less, at her age she goes through stages of looking a bit bedraggled but that's to be expected and she's definitely not a stray, she wears a collar and has her regular worming and flea treatments. We call her in every day and she usually comes but it's not unusual to not see her for a day or so, recently she's been looking really good, has been putting on weight and is really healthy looking.

Last weekend she disappeared for 3 days, we were all out calling her, looking under cars, knocking on the neighbours doors etc, we didn't think anything had happened to her as she's been looking so good recently...

I suspected that the neighbours 2 doors down have been taking her in as I've seen her hanging around on their doorstep from time to time, but when I was out looking for her last week, the neighbours were home and their windows were open so they must have heard me and my DD calling her, 5 minutes later I went outside and she was sitting on their doorstep! We retrieved her, I got her home and fed her and made a big fuss of her then went round to see them.

Neighbour invited me in and informed me that they have been taking her in regularly for several months, she sleeps in their house most nights, they don't have a cat of their own but have food bowls, a litter tray, a cat bed, blankets and toys (including one of those bloody awful fake cats in a basket made from cat fur). I was probably too nice to them and asked why they've been taking her in when they know she's our cat, they said that they thought she looked a bit scruffy and unloved and felt sorry for her. I explained that she's not a young cat, and that she's actually really healthy given her age. I hinted that she has some health problems due to her age and that she needs a special diet and needs to check in with us at least once a day so that I know she's ok.

Nearly a week on, they're still taking her in, still feeding her and she's only been home twice, I'm not able to keep an eye on her general wellbeing as she's always locked in their house, even when they go to work!

I don't doubt that they love her, but we do too and we just want our cat back home where she belongs. How should I handle this?

OP posts:
LillyBugg · 13/05/2015 22:13

That's a good link gabilan. I'm glad I own my cat by law! :D

Justusemyname · 15/05/2015 13:41

Get the cat back and keep it in until she is happy again with you.

bishboschone · 15/05/2015 13:54

I'd be bloody furious if this was me .. I have a 16 year old cat who along with his brother who sadly died last year were my children before having the dc. He is my best friend and we all love him very much ... I'm afraid I would lose my rag with them .. How dare they take your cat ?

Original poster
jennieflower · 16/05/2015 00:56

Update

Lovely old cat is not well, since coming home on Tuesday she has been sneezing and has a runny nose streaming with green snot, her fur reeks of plug in air fresheners and I'm pretty sure she's having a reaction to them, the vet is treating her for a respiratory infection but agreed that it might be an allergy. In a way I'd like to be able to prove that it's the air fresheners so I can give the mad neighbours a good telling off but it could also be down to the stress of the last few weeks, either way, I blame the neighbours for the upset to her routine that has caused this. I'm feeling a lot more assertive now and am ready to give the idiots a good dressing down.

I don't think it's a police matter, I don't think you can own a cat in the same way that you can with a dog, and to be honest, I wouldn't mind it if they took her in for a cuddle now and again as long as they let her come home to us, they've been keeping her en even when they've heard us out calling for her and that's just cruel

OP posts:
Bursarymum · 16/05/2015 10:29

I don't understand why people steal other people's cats. Why don't they just get their own??!

Bursarymum · 16/05/2015 10:31

Op, I wouldn't let them take her at all because as you say it has disrupted her routine and she's started to see their house as her home.

Penfold007 · 16/05/2015 10:37

I would tell the neighbours that their interference has made the cat I'll and you will be expecting them to pay the bill and leave the cat alone from now on.

notapizzaeater · 16/05/2015 10:46

I'd be telling them you've had to take the cat to the vets as she's allergic to airvreesheners and ask if they gave them and request payment of the bill ...

Methe · 16/05/2015 10:51

I would have banged on their door and told the neighbours that they needed to come and explain to my inconsolable child why they thought it was ok to try and steal his pet.

You've been far too polite OP.

I hope you cat is ok now :)

strawberrypenguin · 16/05/2015 11:55

Poor puss, sorry to hear she's unwell. Would a feliway plug in help her with being kept indoors? Agree with whoever said to cat proof your back garden so she could go put there too- not that you should have to!
I think you've been very calm about the who thing, if anyone tried to take my old girl I'd have been battering their door until they gave her back.

Miele72 · 16/05/2015 12:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MokunMokun · 16/05/2015 14:03

We had a similar situation with our neighbours. They would lie and say they had't seen him, they said he would run in and they couldn't stop him. One day my husband saw our cat sitting in the road and our neighbour came out of her house, picked him up and carried him into their house. It went on for a while with us trying to be reasonable but we just keep him in now. He does ask to go out but it's better for us all, I think. We also have two other indoor cats. In the afternoon when the kids are in and out we just shut them into the back room of the house.

For what it's worth he had an accident last year so it's definitely safer indoors. I really have no idea what the neighbours were thinking. It's not like there aren't hundreds of cats in the area looking for homes.

Gabilan · 16/05/2015 14:42

" I don't think you can own a cat in the same way that you can with a dog, and to be honest"

I thought that too but looked it up and you can legally own a cat and taking it is theft. Also, I agree with Penfold. Tell them their actions have made the cat ill and stressed and she's required veterinary treatment. Read the riot act.

I had no idea so many people stole cats. I've known people be adopted by cats but they've always been careful not to tread on anyone's toes and sometimes cats happily have more than one home. Clearly that isn't the case here and your neighbours should just stop interfering.

AuntieDee · 16/05/2015 15:09

I'm glad you are keeping her in to let her get accustomed to her home again. We have just lost a cat that a neighbour has stolen. We went round to her house every day and demanded the cat back (which she did do) but she had a cat flap fitted to her porch and put a heater in there for her. Unfortunately we just couldn't compete.

The last time I went round to collect her she moaned that she had fleas and worms - I pointed out that was because she wasn't coming home. I got the chip registered into my neighbours name, and contacted the vets and informed them of the change of 'ownership'. I thought this might scare her into giving her back - it didn't.

I had to admit that the cat was just happier with her :(

KeepOnTryingTilYouRunOutOfCake · 16/05/2015 15:13

Try. "Stop taking my cat you stupid cow. It's theft and if you continue I will take legal action."

Maybe that will make her think.

Bursarymum · 16/05/2015 16:06

These days no cat is free anyway - usually they will have been paid for so I don't see how you can't legally own a cat.

Original poster
jennieflower · 05/08/2015 22:27

Sadly this is still ongoing. I wrote to my neighbours back in May asking them to stop taking her in, within minutes of receiving my letter they knocked on the door and apologised for upsetting us, they said they wouldn't do it again but over the last few weeks our cat has been coming home less, last weekend, I was coming home late at night and caught the neighbour in the act of taking her in, I had drunk a few shandies Grin and called my neighbour a fecking nut job - oops!

My poor old cat is suffering, around 8 weeks ago she had an upper respiratory infection, we kept her in so that we could give her antibiotics, as it happens I work with my neighbours son so I told him that she was unwell. Our vet said that her infection might have been caused by plug in air fresheners, we don't use them but my neighbours do, our cat stinks of lavender when she has been in their house and every time I've been round to talk to them the scented plug ins have been overpowering in their house.

Over the last few weeks we've noticed her coming home less and less again, I bumped into the neighbours son at work today and asked him if he had seen our cat on his weekly visit to his dad's last night and he said she was there the whole time.

I've written a very strongly worded letter to the neighbours and posted it this evening, what else can I do, should I really involve the police as it seems a bit pathetic to do so?

OP posts:
HonniBee · 05/08/2015 22:38

It is absolutely not okay for them to be doing this! I had a similar experience when I was a child and it was horrible. I would wait to see how they respond to the letter and involve the police if you are not 100% satisfied.
Although I suspect it that they might say they'll stop taking her in, but continue to do so anyway. they sound like nutters, so I'm glad you called him a nutjob! Who steals somebody's cat?!

Original poster
jennieflower · 05/08/2015 22:42

This is the letter:

We are furious to learn that you are still taking OUR cat into your home.

"Dcat" is OUR cat, OUR family pet, we have full veterinary records to prove that she's ours and has been for 17 years.

This situation is deeply upsetting for us and you are being cruel towards OUR cat. We know whenever she's been in your home because she smells strongly of artificial air freshener; our vet thinks she's allergic to plug ins as many cats are and this is likely to be the cause of her recent upper respiratory infections, at her age it's likely that this will kill her eventually.

She's very elderly and as previously explained, she doesn't have a great deal of time left and we want to spend that time with her without causing her the stress of keeping her locked in our house all of the time. All you need to do is STOP TAKING HER IN AND STOP FEEDING HER and she will eventually stop waiting on your doorstep. Then she'll start coming home where she belongs, your interference is prolonging her distress and confusion.

Quite frankly, your behaviour is weird. You've promised to stop taking her in, yet I have caught you sneaking around in the middle of the night letting her in. Why don't you adopt a rescue cat instead of taking ours?

I hope this clarifies matters.

Jennieflower.

OP posts:
Original poster
jennieflower · 05/08/2015 22:49

Incidentally I received an inbox message here on mumsnet a few weeks ago, I ignored it at the time but maybe I should contact them, I'm not interested in a refund or compensation but it would be satisfying to involve the media:

Hi Jennieflower,

My name is Finn and I work for a company called Rumpus Media, I'm hoping to contact you regarding your problem with your neighbour and your cat.

We’re developing a brand new consumer entertainment show for a Major Terrestrial Channel that will focus on dispute resolution.

I’m hoping to talk to you as I think yours could potentially be a case we could resolve (and hopefully get you a refund/compensation) so we’d love to get some more detail if possible.

If you would be willing to have a chat with me about your problem, my contact details are below, alternatively if you drop me a message with your number and a good time to call and I will do so.

Many thanks and I look forward to hearing from you.

Kind regards,

Finn Lehane
Assistant Producer
Rumpus Media
07502223299
[email protected]

OP posts:
Original poster
jennieflower · 05/08/2015 22:58

HonniBee thank you for your response, I do wonder why they have felt it necessary to steal someone else's cat, she's 18 years old, so definitely not a sweet little kitten, she's long haired and frequently needs her matted fur trimming (she stopped allowing us to brush her years ago and now we just cut her matts off whenever they build up so as not to distress her)

Her breath stinks, she hisses and growls at everyone except me and my DS, she's incontinent when kept in the house yet we love her and care for her Grin

OP posts:
HonniBee · 10/08/2015 22:35

How are you and your cat doing, OP? Anymore developments?

imabusybee · 13/08/2015 04:55

OP I think you've been too polite - I would unleash hell on anyone who did this to one of mine. I would be emphasising how upset this is making your children.

Do you have an update for us?

MokunMokun · 13/08/2015 05:45

i think you should just keep her in. It was awful at first keeping our cat in but he's used to it now and doing much better. My strange cat stealing neighbor was walking in front of our house yesterday carrying a kitten. I had to smile. There have been a few cat stealing threads on mumsnet and the neighbors never stop doing it.

Original poster
jennieflower · 14/08/2015 12:55

Well since writing to them on the 5th August they have been noticeably avoiding us, a few days ago I went into the front garden when he was cutting his front grass, he scurried back inside and leaving the lawn half cut so it would seem that they hate confrontation just as much as I do Hmm

They had stopped taking her in since my letter but I've noticed over the last day or so she's been coming home less frequently so I suspect they're at it again. I just need to catch them in the act. We live in a very small, very friendly street and everyone is on really good terms with eachother, all of my other neighbours know the situation and are ready for the fireworks when and if I do catch them

OP posts:
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