New cat arrived, existing cat not happy!

[darksideofthemooncup]

I have an elderly neutered tomcat (Dave) he recently lost his beloved brother and has definitely appeared to grieve so I decided to re-home a 4 year old neutered girl cat (Abi) I have kept them separated although they have seen each other (cue much hissing and growling at each other) However, Davecat decided to have a poo in the bath last night (he has his own litter tray and has never done this before)
Am I safe to assume that this is his way of expressing his utter displeasure at the situation? and please tell me it will get better with time!

Could Dave be frightened of the new cat?

Its difficult to say as there's a delicate power balance with felines.

Worth persevering for a while though, I'd have thought.

Definitely sounds like Dave is cross. The vet usually recommends Feliway (think Glade plug in - but releases cat happy hormones instead of jasmine & lemongrass or whatever). Worth trying it to de stress Dave a bit. With a boy / girl combination you should be ok in the long run. Dave would no doubt been more disgruntled by an adult male rival appearing on the scene. How is Abi settling?

I second the Feliway. I remained a bit sceptical, until mine ran out without me noticing. Well, all hell broke loose, much hissing and swiping from my adult cat to 5 month old kitten. Within a day or two of plugging in the new one MCat is so much more chilled, only getting a bit grumpy now and then when MKitten's on one.

Could you put up a shelf for him to use as a perch? Cats feel more secure when the have a high-up place of their own.

Thanks all, I have a feliway and there has been much less hissing and shouting. Abi is settling in well although she hasn't ventured downstairs yet. I think it might be ok and she is such a little sweetie.

It will get better with time. We have two indoor cats, we got one, then another 8 months later.. both female.

Both my cats are VERY attached to us, being indoor cats they are our best friends, more like little dogs.

When we got the second cat, our first cat was not happy, at all! litter tray problems, growling and hissing, even growling at us!

We did it the wrong way really, and forced them into each other's company (while watching) and after about 3 weeks they were fine. They are now best friends and do everything together :)

Apparently I should have left kitten in the cage, let the existing cat have a sniff and a hiss, and then leave the kitten in a separate room/area where they can smell each other and but not have contact, then gradually introduce.

Our full steam ahead approach worked though ;)

Cat's are funny onions. I'm sure in time they will be ok.

We're 9 months down the line and our old cat still hates the new kitten we brought in at xmas

We tried feliway spray (old cat disliked it and avoided sprayed areas) so not sure if the plug in is worth it.

We did full steam ahead as we have a totally open plan house down stairs so they couldn't really avoid each other.

New cat tries to make friends/play and the old girl growls hisses and smacks him .