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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Neighbour accusing me of neglecting my cat

16 replies

Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 20:41

8 years ago I got two pedigree rescue cats, brothers. At first they got along fine, but then cat A started chasing cat B away, attacking him. Cat B stayed away for longer and longer, until I found out that a neighbour woman was looking after him. We talked about this, she told me how it had taken her hours to entice him inside the house, as he was so timid.

Finally, I decided to give her cat B, and she was very happy. She went on and on about how "special" he is because of being a pedigree.

The neighbour has called me many times during the years, fretting about cat A, who is still living with me. He's naturally slim, and a real pest, roaming the neighbourhood and getting into fights, stealing food etc. I've always been very polite and tried to explain to the neighbour that cat A is a difficult creature with a very wild side to him. I've told her over and over that he is not being neglected, he gets his roast chicken and ham, plus dry food every day. As much as he likes.

During the winter months, he's been indoors every night, but as soon as the weather got warmer, he stayed away for one night. This evening the woman called me and wanted to come over, but I said no. She hung up, and was at the door five minutes later. She asked me if I love my cat, she asked me if I still want him?! She said he is always hungry, always outside. Really? After a whole winter spent mostly inside? Anyway, I lost my temper and asked her to leave. I have a feeling that she's fishing for another cat, perhaps to give to a friend? She seems so utterly impressed by the fact that they are Bengals. I've had enough of her, but I can't stop my cat from going out or from roaming. What, if anything, can she do to me? Can she report me? Can I report her? I'm fuming. Sorry this is so long. I have another thread about a neighbour, but it's not the same woman. And I absolutely adore my cat.

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thecatneuterer · 18/03/2014 21:07

Well she could report you to the RSPCA, but they only seem to investigate the most horrendous of cases. If they ever were to pay a visit they'd just have a quick chat, see that all was fine, and go away again.

I don't think you can report her to anyone unless she starts a campaign of harrassment.

Did you try to explain that he sleeps inside and has food?

Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 21:23

I tried! But she said.....but he doesn't, though, does he? Because of the night he spent away two days ago. Unfortunately he is a skinny guy, and has been all his life. His brother is much bigger, but when you pick my cat up he feels quite heavy, as he is all muscle.

Yes, I think she might report me. I completely agree that my cat is a roaming nuisance, I don't know how many roast chickens I have replaced, he just slinks inside people's kitchens and steals. He also seem to be totally fearless and chases anything, foxes, dogs, other cats.
I tried keeping him inside once, and he chewed part of the bottom of the door off.

He's microchipped, but the address is still the Bengal rescue home's. Should I change it to my address?
I'm just so so angry.

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thecatneuterer · 18/03/2014 21:28

Oh dear:)

Well, don't worry, nothing will happen. And yes, you should always have chips registered to you.

And thinking about the skinniness - has he been wormed recently?

Of course though, as you say, some cats, just like some people, are naturally on the wiry side.

Ducky23 · 18/03/2014 21:30

From the sound of it she's after another cat! I bet she didn't spend hours enticing him in, one of my cats just decided to go and live in a neighbours house once, no reason. Cats do that type of thing. I also had another cat who was naturally very skinny although he ate and ate and ate. She could report you to RSPCA but I would be utterly shocked if they actually investigated that and if they did they would see there's no signs of cruelty/neglect and be on their way!

People like that really annoy me!

Hope she leaves you alone soon!

Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 21:30

Should I ask my vet for some kind of letter to show her? I just don't feel I should have to pander to her! As this has been going on for years, and she's never before asked me if I love him or want him still, I'm wondering if she has someone lined up who'd love to take him? He is wonderful with humans, so affectionate and loving.

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Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 21:35

ducky she's been "harassing" me for years but I've always been calm and polite and explained to her that my cat is different and she can't compare him to his brother. My cat is beautiful, but is full of scars and has a ripped ear from fighting. His brother never fights.
The vet prescribed tranquillisers for my cat once, but I couldn't go on giving them to him, it just seemed totally wrong.
All the staff at the vet's love him too, they know him well....he's always in for abscesses or wounds. He's 9,5 years old now so I'm hoping he'll calm down....

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Ducky23 · 18/03/2014 21:42

Sounds like she's just nosy! If this has been going on for a while maybe report her for harassment? It's not fair that you have to put up with that :( I know bengals can sell for quite a bit, could that have anything to do with it? Cats are territorial and do fight she shouldn't just start throwing accusations at you! I would Deffo get his microchip details changed tho.

Fluffycloudland77 · 18/03/2014 21:42

Change the chip details ASAP.

I'd report her for harassment too, you cannot be subtle with this type of person. Harassment can be one event or several but the police can go and give her words of advice. I had to do it to one of my ndn years ago.

My bengal boys the same, covered in scars, muscular & goes into people's houses like he owns them. God help anyone who accuses me of neglecting him though.

Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 22:28

fluffycloud That makes me smile....they do think they own the world
I've just had good cry and I feel better for it. It's funny how an accusation of cat neglect can hurt so much! Right now he's perching on my shoulder, "grooming" my eyebrows. Grin he is so lovely!

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Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 22:32

Another thing....I often have to give him antibiotics etc, but find it almost impossible to pry his jaws open. I've never known any cat with such incredible "jaw strength". I hate having to force his jaws open with a crow bar....is there an easier way? Smile

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breatheslowly · 18/03/2014 22:36

If she wants another cat then she needs to ask a rescue for one herself. If you are feeling charitable you could give her the contact details of the rescue they came from. Otherwise she really needs to back off.

Ducky23 · 18/03/2014 22:41

Could you wrap his anti biotics in some ham? Smile

Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 22:42

breatheslowly she has all the paperwork from the Bengal cat rescue.
I don't think she wants another cat for herself, but I'm suspecting it might be on a friend's behalf. As I said, this has gone on for years and only now is she asking me if I want to get rid of my boy?

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Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 22:43

ducky at the risk of sounding very thick.....I never thought of that!!!
I'll definitely try it next time. Duh....Blush

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breatheslowly · 18/03/2014 22:44

Then she is either crazy or a real chancer. You just need to ignore her, no one will do anything if she tries to report you.

Hidethechocolates · 18/03/2014 22:49

thecatneuterer he's been wormed regularly but he's always skinny. He did have terrible stomach trouble in the beginning, he was on Hill's Science plan. Once I changed his dry food, his diarrhoea stopped.

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