Should we get a cat?

[Lovethesea]

I had cats growing up, and as a singleton in a flat share. Love them. Had three sleeping on my bed at one point in London (two a flatmate rescued and then left with me, and another stray that adopted me).

DH wants us to get one to enhance our family life - DD 3andhalf, DS 2 in June.

I'm hesitating because I'm not sure I want another being on this planet to need me ... (parenting is a tad overwhelming) ... but they are deliciously mad, somewhat independent and hopefully cuddly.

Pros and cons everyone - please help clear my mind! We don't have a cat flap but I'd make sure cat could get into the summerhouse at all times. Local area is fields and quiet housing estate in large village. Loads and loads of cats in our road.

I'd get a rescue cat, preferably a confident affectionate one that could cope with toddlers!

Oh, and the BIG question ... will the hundreds of local cats stop shitting in my garden if we have our own cat??!!?? One squatted on the grass in front of me today and pooed - I had to race DS to move it out of his reach!

unless you get a brute of an un neutered cat then im afraid other cats will still crap in your garden...but then he wont be very loving and cuddly..and will spray absolutely everywhere

we have a 5 year old dd, who complains constantly that the cats (4) have scratched her, bit her, ruined her game, wont let her cuddle them, did a wee in her bedroom!!!..

We have a lady rescue cat who keeps all other cats out of our garden. She's relentless.
Not THAT cuddly though ...

I think the main thing to think about, like you said, a cat is another dependent. When you are bogged down in all the usual parenting stuff of littlies, pets can end up just being another job to do.

Having said that we've had pets all the way through our 4 growing up, (guinea pigs, gerbils, rabbits, fish and cats) and I can safely say cats are the least faff and you get the most back from them.
Our DCs are all getting older now and our 3 rescue cats are a constant source of entertainment and companionship, but there were times when the DC were small that the pet lark seemed more trouble than it was worth and probably was.

I agree about cats being much lower faff than others.
CPL or RSPCA would be reluctant to let you have a cat with preschoolers in house.
We rarely go on hols & can afford cattery if we did. Else I wouldn't have had them.

Thanks - visited a couple of places today and think we've found a bombproof tabby. He is v.friendly, probably hopelessly wussy and useless at chasing off the competition, but very very tolerant of my kids.

DS (nearly 2) yelled Hellloooo! at top voice, tipped his water dish over, tried to feed him litter pellets, climbed his ramp, dropped a litter tray, pulled his ear gently and stroked his face. And lovely cat just seemed calm and didn't even try to back away. If he can take DS in a small confined pen I'm sure he'll be fine in the house with them.

Cats Protection were fine about the kids (nearly 2 and 3 and half) as long as it was the right cat, ie bombproof. We avoided the timid, nervy ones or the older ones who might want to be left alone more.

Home visit lined up! Now the cat is due to come I can avoid all other pets - I think they would be a lot more hassle. Cat will be far less work than the kids once he can go out too.

Oh wow - he sounds lovely! Yes definitely get a cat. We had one before DS was born and have had many moggies since. DS has loved every one and they have loved him. Sadly his absolutely beloved girl died in April aged 19 and they adored each other. He was very upset but knew it was her time and we still talk about her lots and remember her.

I can't begin to say how much our cats have added to our family life. They have made us laugh, smile and cry for all the right reasons. I think caring for pets teaches DC an awful lot about caring for others and cats are able to show affection back, unlike gerbils, hamsters and rabbits etc which to me makes them an excellent pet choice. And they don't need walking!

Oh I recall the tears I sobbed over dead pets. But they were so worth knowing.

Bombproof cat is just over a year so should be around for some time hopefully, will be lovely to see them grow up together.

Home visit is tomorrow and I hit the pet shop today for essentials. DD threw treats into the basket and toys so he'll be spoilt rotten.

Lots of good advice on my chat thread about slow introductions to the house and minimal room to roam at first to help him adjust.

Hope they say we can get him asap. Want a cat on my bed as I mumsnet!

Oh good, I'm glad you've met your cat. I was also worried about the prospect of another dependent but actually the cat is very little trouble (mainly because I have enforced a strict policy of DH feeding her and doing her litter tray) and as long as she is treated like the queen of the house and has fresh chicken offered to her on a regular basis, she is happy that we are meeting her expectations. If we didn't I fear she would simply force us out on to the street to fend for ourselves, perhaps pointing out she had to do that before we took her in from Cats Protection.