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Bury in the garden or let the vet ....

26 replies

FourFortyFour · 13/03/2011 17:12

Can't find the words.

My cat is ill and will not recover but we may have her for a while yet.

I don't want to have to make a snap decision so are wondering what is the best thing to do.

The options are

  • bring her home and bury her in the garden.
  • have her cremated and bury the ashes.
  • have her cremated and keep the ashes on the mantle piece (not my choice tbh).
  • leave her with the vet to do the necessary.

Any advice gratefully received, thank you.
OP posts:
Marne · 13/03/2011 17:13

bury her in the garden and plant a nice shrub on top Sad.

FourFortyFour · 13/03/2011 17:15

Marne - have you had to do that? Sad

OP posts:
nooka · 13/03/2011 17:18

We buried out family dogs in the garden. I think it is a nice way to say goodbye, and not that this is probably something you want to think about but all the other options (even the last) are quite expensive.

Just make sure you dig a really deep hole to avoid the chance of a fox or dog from digging her up (I think we were advised 4ft). And then yes, plant something nice there.

Marne · 13/03/2011 17:18

Not sinse i was a child, our garden was full of dead pets (rabbits, mice, cats), i have a cat and a dog and i think i would chose to bury them in the garden and plant a shrub. Its hard but do what you feel is best, my mum lost her old dog last year and just left him with the vet Sad.

gardenpixie · 13/03/2011 17:20

Sad for you and your cat

I second burying her in the garden ... my old puss is buried in my parents' garden as he spent a lot of time there and loved it. It's nice to be able to talk to him when I go and stay with them (although clearly everyone thinks I'm talking to myself and insane)

Sending lots of love to you and pusscat

FourFortyFour · 13/03/2011 17:21

All our hamsters have been buried in the garden but the fish went in the bin. This isn't the house we will live in for many more years though - I hope to move in about 5 years or so - and feel weird about leaving her behind.

IIRC it is £90 to have the vet cremate her and sprt out the remains. That was a few years ago though.

OP posts:
FourFortyFour · 13/03/2011 17:22

FFFCat us so naughty she will probably out live all of us and I will have been through this worry for nothing Hmm.

tries to convince self 16 year old cat with failing kidneys is not old

OP posts:
Themumsnot · 13/03/2011 17:24

We have buried our cats in the garden - they died 12 months apart and are buried close together. I couldn't bear not to. The DDs and I made lovely coffins out of cardboard boxes and had a little burial service. We have now planted a cherry tree over the grave.

ImeldaM · 14/03/2011 11:28

That sounds nice Themumsnot, I left my old cat with vets after pts & still makes me a bit sad that we didn't take her home & bury her Sad

clux73 · 14/03/2011 11:30

Our lovely old 19year old cat died recently. We had her cremated and have her ashes in a little wooden casket. We were going to bury her under a tree at my parents house but my daughter won't let her go yet!

2blessed2bstressed · 15/03/2011 11:25

My lovely old cat was put to sleep at the vet a couple of years ago - he was 18, and very ill. The vet gave him the injection and I held him and stroked him until he'd gone. Then I left him with the vet. I have photos and videos of the kids as toddlers dragging him about like Bagpuss, memories of the loudest purr in the world, the way he'd get in the car with us, and the really cute present my ds bought for me as a "memorial" for him, which sits on my kitchen windowsill. We've moved house since he died, so what would I have done if I'd buried him in our garden?

FourFortyFour · 15/03/2011 11:44

I must admit I am struggling with the burying her in the garden as I know we won't live here forever but I think my DH would have a fit if I asked to bring her ashes home in an urn. Just realised that is what I secretly want.

Friday is vet day Sad.

OP posts:
ImeldaM · 15/03/2011 12:20

Sorry for you, FourFortyFour Sad
Something I did with my old puss is take a snippet of her fluff (she was long-haired), before she had gone.
Could you sprinkle the ashes in the garden, her favourite spot?

FourFortyFour · 15/03/2011 13:42

I could take some of her fur. She is very furry Grin.

I can't even bare the thought of leaving her ashes behind SadBlush.

OP posts:
moomin156 · 15/03/2011 13:46

Being a cat lover i would have to bring her home and bury her......i would probably bury in my parents garden as we move frequently. Thats where my childhood cat is. Do you have a similar option???

FourFortyFour · 15/03/2011 16:34

No, as I don't have parents.

OP posts:
pookiecat · 18/03/2011 12:31

I had my lovely old cat put to sleep [ 19 half] and she was cremated. I have a lovely picture of her and miss her terribly[ over 2 yrs ago she passed.] However we now have a lovely rescue cat [ a boy] to join our 2 grumpy girl cats and he reminds me so much of of the cat that died.

izzybiz · 18/03/2011 12:34

I'd bury her in the garden.

We buried our last dog in the garden, we have since moved but I see it as the old house was her final home, where she was old and happy, I think its the best resting place for her.

We have pictures and memories.

paddypoopants · 18/03/2011 12:45

Hi, I'm sorry about your old puss- it's horrible. We have had to get 2 cats put to sleep in the last 5 years. The first one we brought home and buried in the garden but the second one I had to leave with the vet as we had just sold our house and didn't think we could bury him. At the time I felt guilty I'd left him at the vet but actually now I feel a bit weird that we'd left Gus behind in our old garden (I wasn't going to dig him up as I'm not that mad a cat lady).I was too tight to get a personal cremation. I took some of the last one's fur and someone told me that they had taken their cat's foot imprint with one of those kits you get for babies - I wish I'd done that. Good luck for Friday.

WhereTheWildThingsWere · 18/03/2011 12:50

So sorry for you FourFortyFourSad.

Have only just seen this in actice convo's as I am a doggy person not a catty one.

Just thought I would add my feelings though. If you are secretly wishing that you could have her ashes back in an urn then I really think that that is what you should do.

Grieving for a pet is a horrible thing and you don't want to do anything that might cause you regrets.

When I lost my old dog last year, we decided to have his ashes back, they are in a natural bamboo (sealed) little basket thing and just over a year on they are still on the mantlepiece.

The hardest bit for both me and dp was after he had been taken away to be cremated until we got him back a week later, (I realise this was the first week and would have been hard anyway) But as soon as we has him back in the house it was like a huge weight had been lifted and I found it all so much easier to deal with. (They come back with a little certificate to say where they been cremated and we even looked it up on google earth so we could see where he had been 'without us').

I still find it a comfort that he is 'here' in the house and I'm not sure when if ever I will be ready to scatter his ashes, but I have that option if I wish.

I felt so strongly that he was MY dog and I wasn't (and am still not) comforable with the idea of him being anywhere except with me.

FourFortyFour · 18/03/2011 13:39

Oh, it is so hard, isn't it?

She is happy here after lots of house moves so I will have to have a think about it. Hopefully we won't need to think about it for a long time yet.

FFFCat is asleep in my seat on the sofa and I am perched on the end HmmGrin.

OP posts:
mogmum · 19/03/2011 13:57

We had to have our lovely 13 yr old cat pts 6 months ago and I was really unsure what to do.

In the end we had her cremated individually and have now got her ashes in a beautiful wooden sleeping cat which sits on the shelf in the living room.
Like WhereTheWildThingsWere it is a great comfort to know she is here with us and I talk to her every day still.

Thinking of you as I know what it is like when a much-loved pet is ill

iwastooearlytobeayummymummy · 19/03/2011 14:09

I am sorry, but am about to share a gruesome story, based on my own experience.

When our old cat died we buried her in the garden, but horrifically foxes dug her up whilst we were away on holiday, and I was 'greeted' by a truly horrible scene on our return.Fortunately the children were pre occupied elsewhere and didn't see it, and I managed to collect up her remains.

My advise would be to cremate and then scatter the ashes. or dig an improbaly deep hole and place a slab over the grave.

Bearcat · 19/03/2011 20:58

We had our old cat cremated (by himself supposedly and at great expense) and then brought his ashes home from vets in a little wooden box and buried him in the garden.
I think it cost £165, including the vets fees for putting him to sleep.
I just knew that I didn't want his body rotting away underground, and don't want that for myself either, and after years of pleasure owning him just wanted for him what I want for myself and DH and was willing to pay for it.

Driftwood999 · 22/03/2011 00:50

OP, I truly feel for you and what you are having to come to terms with. It's very sensible to think of the "arrangements" beforehand and what is right for your circumstances. It really helped us and took the pressure off. Having decided what we wanted to do, come the inevitable, we buried the beloved puss in the garden earlier this year. To be practial, prepare the grave two spades deep and lay a slab on top. The vet will tell you not to wrap them. Ours is surrounded by primroses which are just beginning to bloom. Don't plant a shrub or any thing that might need attention for a couple of years. I'm so sorry; they give so much pleasure don't they? In the meantime continue to enjoy each other's company. By the way, we moved away from a previous property with pet's graves, but that is not unusual so don't fret about that.

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