Recommendations for helping my elderly dog stay comfortable with palliative care

[Muddypawswarmheart]

My 13 year old Shih Tzu has been diagnosed with nerve damage under his armpit. The vet has prescribed paracetamol, metacam, gabapentin and memantine. He is unable to put any weight or use his front right paw at all. After a long consultation with the vet we have decided on palliative care going forward. He is completely fine within himself eating and still loves getting cuddles etc. My heart is absolutely breaking for him to be honest I am struggling with the grief of it all and feel like he has been robbed of his final years. I've come into this section in the hope of recommendations for items to buy him to help his quality of life particularly a sling for getting in/out of the car and anything else that you can think I need to buy him.

Pawhut buggy so he can go for “walks” still. Will help mentally. Can he get round your house ok on three legs? I’m sorry you’re going through this, had Shih Tzus as a child and they’re lovely little dogs. 13yo is a good age for them, I know that doesn’t help though.

Hi, I'm so sorry you are going through this.

I have 3 dogs and have had dogs pass in the past and any I have lost have actually been quick or accidental deaths so I have never had to think about palliative care with them.

However I did have to do that with my 19yo cat who developed dementia and seizures.

I don't think this is what you want to hear but if your lovely dog is on that staggering amount of pain relief and is unable to gain weight (my assumption from that is that it would be good if he could, so he is underweight) and unable to get around himself now I would be looking at doing the kindest thing we can do for the little ones we love and letting him go to sleep in a controlled environment.

You have given him 13 years of a good, happy, independent life and for him to spend the end of it being carried around whilst spaced out on painkillers is not the best thing for him. That's the reality of your plan, he will be drugged, in pain, confused and unable to do the simplest things he has done his whole life. He won't understand why.

Please do not think I am criticising you for thinking this way. I understand that drive to keep our best friends with us and that human emotion of 'he may need painrwlief and he can't mobilise well but he is still here' but the only life he has ever known is one being pain free and running about like a lunatic (i have a shihzu, i know!) and he doesn't have that ability anymore.

In your shoes I would book an appointment with the vet to put him to sleep and have a week of absolutely spoiling the heck out of him. Take him to the beach. Take him to Pets at home and let him choose any toy. Go to McDonald's and buy him a double cheeseburger 🤣 and take 50 photos a day.

I kept my 19yo cat alive too long. I couldn't face the truth of what was happening to him and in 12 hours overnight he deteriorated to the point that he had an awful last few hours and his euthanasia appointment was much more traumatic than it could have been if I had made the right decision a few weeks beforehand.

Again I am so sorry you are in this situation.

Sending you so much love 💐

Just noticed I've posted in pets and not the dog house. Have asked mumsnet HQ to move post over.

@JulietteHasAGun a buggy is a great idea so he can still get out and about outside he absolutely loves sniffing. He's still fine at the moment plodding around the house, forgot to say I have put down mats on my flooring so he doesn't slip. Thanks for your kind help and words.

I think @MeepMeepMeepMeepMeep is right, he must be in a lot of pain with that amount of pain relief and however much you do for him he is going to be miserable because he can’t do all of the things he normally does. When my dog was very unwell the vet said there were things we could do to prolong her life but we needed to think about her and not ourselves. We scheduled her to be put to sleep 48hrs later and honestly it was the kindest thing we could ever have done.

You have given him the best 13 years so give him a lovely peaceful ending. ❤️

@MeepMeepMeepMeepMeep he is still a good weight and can get around himself it's just jumping up/down he's struggling with. He's not spaced out or anything just his normal self. I totally understand your post though and thank you for your kind words. I spoke with the vet and we have a end of life plan in place I definitely would let him go sooner no matter how hard that was for me than having him drag on. I was offered ct scans and all sorts for him but decided not to put him through all of that and just let him be as much as possible for the time we have left together.

I think you have misunderstood ops initial post. She didn’t say he couldn’t GAIN weight, she said he couldn’t bare weight on that leg?
And, I also disagree with you since pain meds affect different dogs in different ways. One of mine takes multiple pain meds and still has an excellent quality of life. I wouldn’t dream of PTS for her right now, since she is so well and happy.

@frecklejuice thank you. The vet has said he's not at that stage yet.

What a gentle and truthful post. OP please read and consider the spirit in which it was posted .

@Muddypawswarmheart
@MeepMeepMeepMeepMeep

Apologies I did misread the weight comment.

I still stand by what I said. That is a tremendous amount of pain relief.

Looking back I actually wonder why my own cats vet didn't bring up euthanasia before hand.

Even the day we booked the emergency appointment for being PTS the vet started talking about trying steroids.

I had to be the one to say 'no he has had enough. We are here to put him to sleep'

The cynical part of me wonders if the sheer amount of appointments/pain relief/ consults at the end of his life were prolonged from the vets side as a cash cow situation.

My foster dog has mobility issues and has been on a very similar cocktail of pain meds for a year now. It's enabled her to have a good quality of life and be able to enjoy walks again.

She has ramps to help her on the sofa and into the car. And we have an Innopet dog buggy, so she can accompany us on longer outings.

Sorry to hear about your Foster dog @SpanielsGalore will look into ramps.

I am sorry that has been your experience. It certainly shouldn’t be and it hasn’t been mine. I absolutely subscribe to the “better a day too early than a day too late” when it comes to animal euthanasia but I have never felt, in a very long history of multi dog ownership, that any of my vets were attempting to prolonged the life of any of my animals for financial gain. And I wouldn’t have allowed it anyway. We all know our own dogs, we know when it’s time.

Is there any reason why you’d need a sling for the car? A Shih Tzu is a pretty small dog - it would be much less faff to just pick him up surely?

Is the nerve damage the reason he can’t bear weight? As in loss of function? Or is it pain?
Like previous posters, who put it much better than I ever could, I wonder how much discomfort he must be in. Dogs mask incredibly well and in my experience, vets will very often wait to be led by owners in this area. Even when my dog was at an acute end phase battle with aggressive cancer, it took me broaching and pushing for pts.
Not in my case because I felt they were doing it for financial gain, just they laid out other prolonging actions and ignored the obvious alternative