Advice on settling in a 6 year old rescue dog

[HarleysDream]

We are collecting our 6 year old rescue dog next week and im just looking for advice, what do I need to get and what to expect.
It's a bichon, his owner has died and hes living in a foster home at the moment. They said he is great with kids and other dogs but if allowed can wander.
We have a fully fenced garden so not worried about that.
I've never had a rescue dog before so Im unsure what to do. Where should I put his bed? I dont think he is crate trained but will check. Do we try and just have a normal day once we come home from collecting him?

We got our rescue dog a year ago - similar age having not had a rescue before. Sadly ours had been badly physically abused and was recovering from major surgery following his poor treatment, it was heartbreaking. He had bad separation anxiety. I would say go slow and steady, introduce him to wider family slowly, he’s lost his owner and the adjustment for their little minds is huge. He needs to build up trust in you. Prepare for toileting accidents and he may surprise you and be fine but change to routine can set them back in this way. Depending on what you’re comfortable with, our pup sleeps in his crate with crate door open in our bedroom, so he can get water etc if needed and he doesn’t feel trapped. He would cry his heart out if it was locked. We did use stair gates for a while to restrict areas like kids bedrooms etc at night. Make sure all your practicalities are in place like register with a vet, insurance and micro chipping updated. Ask whoever you are getting him from for any blanket or toys he’s had there so it’s familiar for him. If they are local could you take in a blanket from your home so he gets used to your scent over the next few days? Also leaving him home alone go very slowly, a few minutes at a time and build it up. Try and keep his first few days calm if possible. It can take longer to settle a rescue dog but the reward is overwhelming, I would 100% do it again.

Expect quite a lot of regression in terms of behaviour, ie a toilet trained dog having accidents, a usually happy independent dog getting a little big separation anxiety-ish, a dog that’s slept through since a pup getting up in the night. Otherwise just go at their pace!

As others have indicated, it all really rather depends and no two dogs are the same. Our dog's previous owner died suddenly - her two dogs were found with her body by family (she lived alone) - and they were kept in their home by a combination of family and friends, until adopters could be found. The elderly sister went to a close friend, but our very energetic, five at the time (almost 6) year old Lab-Staffy cross came to us via recommendation from the rescue charity we'd adopted our previous (very, very damaged) dog from.

She settled with us perfectly. No accidents, no incidents, no separation anxiety - she is almost perfect (she's selective about other dogs) and adores every human on the planet. Mischievous aspects of her personality took quite a while to emerge - it was almost like she thought "Best behaviour until your paws are well and truly under the table!" - but these are funny and part of her adorable character and nature. She's been with us since September 2024 and will be 8 later this year.

We gave her time and space, but she didn't especially want it - she wanted a lot of physical attention from the word go. But with our previous rescues, we understood and observed the 3/3/3 rule about how long it takes them to settle and decompress.

The 3/3/3 rule mentioned above is really ringing true with our 3-year old rescue and I'm so glad I was aware of it. He has been absolutely perfect (aka best behaviour / a bit shut down) but we've just passed the 3 month mark.
He's starting to show authentic behaviour now, which is mostly fine but he needs some support with other things. Fortunately our rescue is linked with a behaviourist who does free advice calls for dogs they've rehomed, and at the outset the rescue took ages to make sure we'd be a suitable home for him.

I guess in brief I mean - don't assume you have got it cracked just because he seems to settle straight in. You've committed to him for the long haul and there will likely be bumps along the road, but stick with him.

Last of all a practical bit of advice (which we found invaluable) - you need to deal with any non-negotiables from day 1, eg don't let him sleep on the bed "while he settles in" if he isn't going to be allowed that long term; don't feed him from the table if that's not how he will live usually. It's harder, and more confusing for the dog, to try and change things down the line.

Good luck! I am certain it will be worth all your effort

Excellent advice.

I would recommend starting as you mean to go on. Try to keep everyone calm and just help him to slot in.
Put his bed somewhere a bit out of the way so he can retreat to it if he wants to or give a choice of beds if you have space. I have always had rescue dogs and my most recent is highly sociable but would often go to her bed in the hall when we first had her. She had been in kennels for a long time and I think she just needed a bit of space.
As a PP said, set your rules from the start re where the dog can go etc and make sure you give them space when they’re being fed. It’s also helpful to leave them (even for a few minutes) and not to make an issue out of it.
Even if the dog loves children, remember that this is a whole new start for him so make sure he can get some peace and be left alone in his bed or a certain area and supervise play carefully.
Good luck! He sounds lovely.

Some excellent advice above. Just to reiterate, start as you mean to go on with regard to the routine, be prepared for regression, give the dog physical and emotional space, no visitors for a while, let the dog set the pace for meeting new people and their pets.
Enjoy!