Stories of hope for clingy puppy?

[BiroOutlaw]

Afternoon 😊 I am a lapsed MNetter with grown up children,who has rejoined for some puppy support!

We are experienced dog owners, but always had spaniels (cocker & springer). As one of our grandchildren had a dog allergy, we decided not to replace our last dog but after finding his allergy was not triggered by poodles and doing some research into the breed, we are now the proud owners of a very adorable minature poodle puppy.

We have had him 48 hours, so I am probably panicking early! He is from a good breeder, with all relevant health checks and we know other people with lovely dogs from previous litters. Pup is clever & playful but gentle, very unlike previous spaniel puppies 😅

He is SUPER clingy though! I have read everything I can on the research around avoiding separation anxiety & having a confident pup & I am doing what seems to.be 'best practice' I.e. sleeping beside his crate at night, lots of reassurance and cuddles but he is only really happy if he has some form of contact with us and will shriek like a banshee if I nip to the toilet, pop him in his crate to answer the door etc. We can't 'build up' the time as he isn't even happy for one second! He isn't interested in the kong or any toys if we are not in sight.

I suppose my question is, did anyone else have a puppy like this and did they grow up to be more independent and ok without you for short periods? If so, how did you get there? Is it just he needs more time?

If I know I am doing the right thing and it will pay off then then I am fine with managing this stage... but I have this awful anxiety that not leaving him is actually a mistake and a few people have suggested I am 'making a rod for my own back' and need to start being a bit more firm.

For comparrison, none of our spaniels were ever like this and would easily do 10 minutes in a crate with a food based distraction and they definitely would sleep on the floor/bed without needing to be touching you at all times!

Any reassurance or advice is welcome 😊

IMO you are doing the right thing and should ignore the rod for your own back people.
My puppy (spaniel) came to the toilet with me and sat on my lap for weeks. I don't think I left her home alone until she was at least three months old. My neighbours looked after her if I needed to go out before then.

I have a friend who is a behaviourist. (A good one.) She says the important thing is building a secure bond with your puppy and never leaving them to cry it out. Once they feel happy and safe, they will be confident enough to go off and explore other rooms on their own.

I would say it is still very early days.

We've always relied on support from gentle trainers, right from the very beginning.

Have you got one of those toy dogs with a heartbeat? Our puppy had one for a couple of weeks as recommended by the breeder, from Amazon. It may help.

We do have one of these, I was laid listening to it last night 😅 I do think he likes it as he snuggled up to it. It is the daytime clinging and needing constant contact that has worried me a bit for.the future 😬

He's a tiny baby still, of course he doesn't want to be left on his own yet. I think you're expecting too much.

You are probably right, to be honest I am quite happy to cuddle him (who wouldn't be!) and be with him all the time... just dont want to do that if it going to lead to problems later on! He is definitely clingier that any of.my previous pups or pups that our friends have had so I think I am just anxious not to get it wrong 😬

As PP have said, ignore anyone who says you're making a 'rod for your own back.'

All dogs are different, even within breeds and litters, and are ready for different things at different times. My boy couldn't leave me alone for more than a second - he used to chin on the bath whilst I was in it - until he was nearly three. I think I took my first solo pee about two months before he turned three tbh. But his littermate sister, who my sister owns, was fine sleeping downstairs in the kitchen alone from night one.

Remember, up until you bought him home he's never been alone. Give him some time to settle it - he'll be fine 😊

I got a border collie pup this summer, and she was also a Velcro dog. I obsessively read everything on the internet (maybe a slight exaggeration, but I did go a bit loopy). I decided to trust the people who said that you need to let your pup be with you as much as they wanted, as it made sense to me. It’s all about building a strong foundation of confidence and trust. Honestly it drove me nuts, couldn’t even pee alone, as others have said. However I think it was the right thing to do. She is 8 months now and for about a month I have been leaving her at home alone for an hour or so. She even sometimes chooses to sleep by herself downstairs.

I think this too. He will get there.

we had a clingy puppy, one thing that really helped us was developing her confidence. We did puppy training classes, found as many ‘puppy socialisation parties’ as we could and as soon as we were able to we put her in a doggy daycare type place for one morning a week where she plays all morning with other dogs.

Just to update, pup has been a bit more settled today and a few little signs of his confidence growing so hopefully we are on the right track 🐶