Is it cruel to have a dog if you work??

[wherearetheturrets]

Our family would like to get a dog at some point.. I’m currently a sahm (dc14,3 and 2) but will be going back to work in about a year. I haven’t wanted to get a dog yet as I don’t really feel comfortable with such young dc, plus my hands are full with the young dc and I just don’t feel able to care for another living creature on top!

But I feel like I’ve always heard the opinion that it’s unfair on a dog to be left alone at home all day while its owners are at work. So do people only have dogs if at least one person is around a lot? It’s making me feel like we maybe shouldn’t have a dog if my dp and I would be out at work, but also feels a real shame to not let my dc experience having such a lovely pet as a dog, and giving a dog a loving home. Just wondering if that opinion really is the dominant thinking?

We have my sisters dog one day a week. It helps her out plus we have all the plus sides of having a dog with none of the expense etc.
I can’t have a dog as I work 50 hrs a week and these are long shifts. I have a bf I don’t live with so I am basically in my own.
So go on the borrow my doggy website and match with a dog you could make part of the family on a part time basis.

It's not working that's the issue, it's how long the dog is left on it's own.
If both of you are working a the same hours full time that's too long and you would have to consider a dog walker, doggy day care etc.
If you both work but your working hours aren't the same then it depends how long the dog would be alone.

I meant to add, I think it's important to remember pets are not accessories but little creatures who need love, care and attention. Part of that involves ensuring they are happy and stimulated. You can't just come home and flop on the sofa, they need walks, playing and lots of attention and interaction. If you don't think you could meet those needs then it would be irresponsible to get a dog. It's a shame but that's how it is.

We have two. I’m a sahm and dh works from home. They also go to dog day care once a week to socialise with other dogs. We never leave ours alone for more than a couple of hours and that’s not often. They would be miserable they are real people dogs.

It's cruel to leave a dog on it's own for hours at a time. Dogs are pack animals and need company. Those funnies online where dogs have destroyed the sofa are carried out by dogs that are bored out of their minds. If you know you're going back to work soon then this probably isn't the right time to get a dog.

You shouldn't leave a dog at home alone all day, every day, no.

If you WFH it's fine. Or if you can afford a doggy day care service. Or if you have a relative that can do some dog care for you.

But no, it's not something that you pop on a shelf while you're all out and then play with when it suits.

If you want a dog but work long hours (or do 5 days), you need to be prepared to pay a sitter several times a week.

You could also get two low energy breeds that would be happy to chill at home. It’s not uncommon for sight hound owners have this set up. They don’t take loads of work, and won’t chew the house up (although not very excitable and doggy, so may be a dealbreaker).

Depending on the breed you'd want, yes it would be cruel and also just a recipe for disaster.

DH works from home & I only work part-time so we can juggle things so AwkwardPup isn't left for more than 4 hours. If/when I go back full-time we'll have to organise a dog walker if we are both out (which is an additional expense to consider!).

We delayed getting a dog until we were in this position; we've always had cats which are more than happy to be left all day but dogs are a completely different level.

Its worth considering that so many family activities aren't dog friendly - we especially struggled in the summer when a nice day out for us would have been far too hot for the dog, and if you want to do a full day out at many places (farm park, zoo, theme park etc) you either have to settle for a few hours or get a dog sitter / call in a favour!

So long as you're willing to pay for someone to walk your dog and give it a bit of company when you're out for long stretches, it's ok. But that can get pricey.

We both work but luckily my hours are variable. The longest our dogs are on their own is probably about 6 hours. We got our 2nd dog as a companion for the first so he wasn't lonely and they are besties. Play and sleep together and share a mutual hatred of any postie or delivery driver. We are also lucky that we have a very secure enclosed garden so they can go outside whenever they need as the door is left open. They also get a long run in the park or woods at least once a day too. They are also fairly small breeds .

This is the thing that would put me off - all the restrictions of days out. Couldn't have a day out in London for example on the spur of the moment - l thinkna dog would be worse than a child@

I’ve seen on an American forums people saying i is it better if a dog stays in kennels for years not being adopted or they ate left eight hours a day. I think it’s an interesting comment. But in general, if you expect to be out all day every day at worst you should budget a dog walker each day, but I do think that in your situation I probably wouldn’t. When a dog gets older holding their bladder for eight hours could also be a struggle.

I’d also add you probably can’t adopt a dog from kennels with that work pattern, but Iv suppose you could do it now.

I have a dog and work part time, a mix of wfh and in the office. Two days a week he's left about 6 hours with a dog walker, other days I'm either home or he gets left between 2-4 hours. I rehomed an older dog deliberately so he gets a walk and then is happy having a nap while I'm out. But that's his limit, if I leave him 6 hours (with a dog walker) 3 days a week then his behaviour lets me know it's too much. And that's an old dog, not a pup. I know people do have dogs who work full time but I don't think it's fair to have a dog if you're out all day 5 days a week, even with a dog sitter. Something else to consider is that if I am at work during the day, then I won't leave him in the evenings because that's not fair. Similarly, I tend to only pop out at the weekend without him or try and wfh Mon or Fri, again so he's not left too much. If I go out and don't have a dog walker I'm limited to 4 hours so have to always have an eye on the time. Does that fit in with your lifestyle? Another thing is if you get a pup, you can't leave them straight away - it might be a long time (months) before they can be and are happy to be left 4 hours. The same with getting an older rescue, they still need to adjust living with you and settle in, and if like me your dog has separation issues it can take months of hard work before they can be left any real length. I wanted a dog for years before I felt I was in a position to be a good home for one.

I'd honestly wait until your younger children are much older. As others have said, it's not just the issue of leaving the dog all day while you're out at work but it also restricts in other ways. If your children have after school activities and you like to do things as a family at weekends, you will find you have very little time to devote to a dog.

Honestly for daytime activities he is more restrictive than our DS (3yo). I didn't realise how restrictive it would be in reality, especially in hot weather, to be completely honest.

My inlaws always said they'd be so happy to dog-sit before/when we first got dog, but now are busy with their own activities/holidays or helping with other grandchildren & tbh they don't really enjoy the additional mess etc that a dog brings. We have UK based holidays so dog can come too.

For evenings, we can take dog to the pub (DH often does) but not to many other things. We sometimes take him to a drive in cinema if we have a childfree evening! But evenings out together are a rarity anyway.

If you’re both out of the house 5 days a week 8-9 hrs a day then yes it’s not ideal to get a dog even if you pay for dog walking services. But if say theres someone there wfh 2 out of 5 days which is quite common within a couple,then I think its less of an issue.

A bit like sorting out care rotas with children it's the same with my dog. I literally have a 'village' to help or should that be pack!

I work full time and partner works away 3 nights a week.
Days i need to work on site my dog either goes to day care all day or if im home by about 4 he has a dog walker. I'll leave 730am and she picks him up 1030..does a 2 hour pack walk then drops him home.

MIL will have him a half day and I've a friend up the road who has a dog do we'll pop into each other's if we have an emergency come up.

Fridays partner is home so if I'm on site he has him.

Honestly it's a real juggling act at time, plus the cost but I love him and he deserves the best.

It makes it sound as if i never have my dog. I do..but i need options, back up options and further back up options. Generally he's at daycare x 1 weekly and dog walker x 1 weekly. I got the additional dog walker recently as my daycare person has got so busy.

The most important thing though is he gets on with any dog. I did a lot of work with him as a pup. If you have a dog that's problematic you'll end up not having the same options I do.

I do think I would struggle with the limitations! Really useful to hear various things to consider so thank you all :)

I'm not sure what our works patterns would end up being, I’m likely to be 9-5 and partner works shifts so a little flexibility there, plus older dc will return from school earlier than I would return from work etc.

personally I feel it’s just too much/too awkward to work around. Dp would get a dog tomorrow if I said yes! But I’m the sensible one

If you both work full time out of the house, you would be very wrong to get a dog. My dog would be very unhappy alone for more than 4 hrs.

Rescues and Pet4Home are full of dogs about which the write up says, "Fido is a wonderful dog but a change of work hours is not getting the attention he deserves."

I second what PP have said about other commitments too - after school activities, medical appointments, traffic delays, illness, weddings, family parties, Christmas and even supermarket shopping. Your first thought always has to be, "What about the dog."

I waited until I worked for myself to get a dog because my work was 100% dog friendly. I was so glad I did that because one thing I'd not accounted for was that it wasn't just that the dog didn't want to be left, I really, really didn't want to leave her behind and go out for hours wondering if she was happy/safe/ok.

As PP have said it’s not working that’s the issue, it’s how long the dog will be alone and how it will be cared for during those working hours.

You also need to consider things like days out, parents evenings, activities - how are you going to walk the dog if it’s pissing down rain, DH is at work and your kids are sick. Or what happens if the kids all have activities but the dog has already been left most of the day?

What do you think people in other countries do - who don't have the concept of SAHM ... They still have dogs.

I think your household sounds too busy to get a dog atm. It’s not just unfair on the dog to be left alone but when are you going to fit in the walking , training etc