First time family dog, what breed might we be missing?

[IesuGrist1975]

We are finally in a position to get a dog within the next year due to my father-in-law moving into our granny(dad) annexe meaning a pet dog will be a companion for him on my 2 work days. Our youngest children are 6 years old and 10 years old and we have a medium sized garden and live in an urban area but have access to a good few large parks and spend the weekends at kids sports, usually in muddy fields with loads of other dogs so a dog being happy around other dogs is important.

It will be our first family dog, we have a 9 year old cat and while my parents occasionally bred my father’s working springer spaniels when I was growing up, they lived in kennels rather than indoors so this is a first indoor pet dog. Another thing to mention is that this dog is going to be a bit of emotional support me (my mum is terminally ill) so a dog that is happy to be loved by me would be excellent.

Having done quite a lot of research on here and other online resources I’v got a shortlist of,

• Miniature (or standard) poodle,
• Rough collie
• Border terrier.

These have made it onto the list for being either side of medium. Intelligent, happy with a couple of 30- 60 min walks a day, being good family dogs, happy to relax after a good walk. I’m wondering if we’ve missed any other obvious breeds off the list? Or if any of those don’t really fit the bill? We’ve been in contact with a couple smooth collie breeders and they’re currently what we’re leaning towards but happy to be swayed.

Ours learned to go to the bath tab to do her business is we were not home to take her out. She learned this all by herself.😊

Yup! Echo you! I have an 11 year old cockapoo why can still play like a puppy, but adores playing in the garden, cuddles and bed, and his little bro, a 9 year old toy poodle who is exactly the same. Beyond loving and will be super excited to see you.

Op, I am so sorry to hear about your Mum, that is so very sad. My Dad died 21 years ago, and my cats were indifferent, I think a dog will be an amazing.ing help to you. My best friend died tragically 2 1/2 years ago. She loved my dogs and they her. My cockapoo pulled me through my grief after losing her, lying with me as I cried and listened to me when I talked about her when I was up to it. I can’t speak for the other breeds, I’m afraid, but for unconditional love and support in uncertain and upsetting times, together with providing the happiness and playfulness your family also need, cockapoo ( and poodle) were a godsend. My cockapoo also has “ human eyes”… so he genuinely looks like he is listening but also understanding what you say!

I wish you luck with all the changes you have going on, I hope your Dad move in goes well, you chose the most amazing puppy!, and I send 💕🙏for you and your mum x

I was completely entranced by a whippet that used to come into our local cafe. The owner used to sit and read for an hour (probably post walk) and then leave, and you’d hardly know she had a dog.

It used to sit so serenely and contentedly beside her - so regal. I made a note that if I ever got a dog, a whippet would be high on my list.

@IesuGrist1975

Apologies, I was just to add I’m sorry, I meant Father in Law, then as I scrolled back, I realised I think I have committed the sin for the first time of not reading all the comments, and your replies.. so, please ignore my long post 🙄

Can I say border or smooth collie - both under-rated as family dogs on mumsnet but honestly the best dogs, yes they need to be kept busy on a daily basis with mental stimulation but they are incredible, you don't need a flock of sheep to own a collie - they excel at agility or flyball and honestly they are the best dogs :-)

Another vote for labrador.. OK they can be greedy, but great family dogs and mine was brought up with chickens and a rabbit, no aggression towards them at all

A lot of Goldens these days are prone to terrible resource guarding.

We rehome quite a few every month at our local brews club/rescue - always due to bites on children (which are always down to piss-poor ownership and not the fault of the dogs).

OP, please don’t get a Goldie with a child that young.

I suppose it will come as no surprise, but I think you should have a Sheltie Shetland Sheepdog).

Easy to train, loyal, great fun and it is easy to keep their coats in good condition. Lovely dogs.

DP wants us to get a whippet, for all the reasons outlined on this thread.

I would NOT be getting a collie for my first dog! They are s massive handful.

I’d go lab OP if I was you. They have the absolute best temperaments 🐾🐾🐾

Miniature Schnauzer every day of the week.

Although once you start loving him don’t you dare stop or he’ll pawjab you until you continue!

I would strongly recommend a Cavalier King Charles. That was my childhood dog. Loving, gentle and full of personality.

My family had about 10 in total. I don’t where they came from but my family knows their stuff. Only 2 were worthy of the breed standard. Utterly beautiful. All were very kind but riddled with health issues. The current one is deaf from birth we think, has eyes problems and hip problems. I worry that like pedigree cockers (not working ones) the breed is beyond return. You will intensely struggle to get a healthy one. If you do; the grooming is time consuming if you do it properly, which you should if you have a top dog. I would avoid, for the same reason as I would not touch pedigree cockers anymore. There are some lines available (think of the Princes of Wales’s dogs) but a normal person won’t get access to those.

Definitely nothing with a prey drive if you have a cat. No matter what breed you get, as a puppy it will likely annoy your cat for a bit as it will want to play. The cat will typically show it who is boss though and give it a swipe with its paw when it's too annoying.

Border collies are lovely but extremely active. Won't be happy standing on the sidelines while you watch kids sports, they'll want to be off running and chasing a ball.

I've had three golden retrievers and they're wonderful with children. Not great if you're in muddy fields regularly because their fur gets long, so maybe go for their Labrador cousin instead.

Another vote for a mini schnauzer too.

@schoolstruggle if we’re going to play the ‘I am’ game…

I’m a Goldie breeder with 21 years experience, who’s mother bred for 30 years, and who is heavily involved in both the show world and rehoming abandoned Goldies (who, as I said, are almost all rehomed due to bite issues or because of resource guarding).

So on this ‘I am’ game, I come out on top - if you want to play it. There is a reason I said what I did and it wasn’t to be difficult or contrary, it was because too many Goldies are being rehoned because of bites on children and due to resource guarding. Two via our breed club alone this month. There’s quite a lot of Goldie owners of MN who have experienced this first hand. There’s an AMA thread with more information.

Careful research into breeders only goes so far. Once the puppy is yours, almost anything that happens after in terms of behavioural is 100% down to poor ownership. And owning kids makes that even more likely.

And most good breeders (of any breed) wouldn’t sell to OP anyway with a kid that young.

I’m glad you had good experiences with a Goldie, but what OP is offering (a few 30 min walks a day), a young child etc. and what she clearly wants (low shedding - look at the dogs she listed and small) do not align with a Goldie. And that’s a one way ticket to a bit or behaviour issues. If you cannot give a dog what it needs, you only have yourself to blame when it develops bad behaviours of bites - and with something as big as a Goldie, you’d be a fool to risk it.

Edit: to say, I’m not trying to be a dick. But OP clearly is not suited to a Goldie, to recommending one - no matter how well intentioned - is unhelpful, and also adds to the risk of yet another dog suffering due to the wrong owner

I actually came back to correct myself then saw your reply. I’m surprised it’s an issue. My experience of goldens are kind, friendly and easy going natured dogs. My brother and I were 7 & 5 when we got one. We used to play with her for hours and she was the most gentle dog. We got our current girl when my kids were 8 & 10 and she has been the gentlest dog too. I love the breed and it makes me sad they are being labelled as a problem. 😢 They always were a family dog. I kept in touch with my girl’s litter mates and 6/9 are in families with children including babies coming along after they joined their families.

Trouble is with threads like this is they are full of anecdotes;

"well yes I know they're a breed desperate to work but trust me I had a border collie once and it was sooo lazy"

"I knew a poodle that bit once so therefore they are all bitey"

"Springers are great, they're so calm. My one is really chill"

"I had a beagle that wasn't a barker, trust me they're quiet dogs..."

---

All codswollop, total anecdotes, may well be the posters experience but not representative of the breed over all and without wider context (ex. the nutcase poodle's owners who by their own admission were "soft owners who didn't need to be listened to" would cause issues with any dog)

Please OP, do extensive research into breeds and be very careful of listening to anecdotes.

Considering the cat I would look at

Golden retriever
Labrador
Bichon Frieses

I will also throw in one more. A basset hound. They are amazing family dogs. Like cats

However 4 things

1. They are stubbornindependent!! So interesting to train. Everything takes a bit longer to do. However utterly worth it
2. They don't chase a ball if that's of inportance to the children
3. Are happy with a walk a day and happy to keep going for hours too (once grown)
4. I am very biased

And still with the ‘don’t get a Collie, they’re too difficult’, as if all ‘Collies’ are working sheepdogs (which are different again from a show line Border Collie).

Smooth Collies are, in general, a bit more full on than the Roughs but very biddable and trainable to fit in to family life. The grooming is easier, but don’t be fooled in to thinking they don’t moult, that would be far from the truth.

I think out of the three you have mentioned the mini poodle would be the most suitable choice. I wouldn't get a terrier if I had a cat and you can't offer enough excercise for a collie so it will will probably be bored and destructive. It's also not an ideal dog for an urban area.

I think you should look at smaller lap dogs. Something like a Bichon, Malteser, Lahsa Apso would probably suit what you want a dog for better.

I’m on my third whippet. Adorable, sleepy, one walk a day not even far - they prefer to sleep than walking!
good with children. don’t eat much. very elegant.

Goldies are such soft balls it's hard to even imagine one angry but I hear what you're saying and poor ownership screws up the chances of perfect dogs every day. I can't even imagine the face of GR being angry 😢

these threads tends to be people just getting excited about

1. their own dogs
2. a dog they experienced whose behaviour fell outside of the norm for that breed

and not really listening to what the OP's requirements in a dog are

I would have LOVED a goldie. I have never ever met a goldie that I did not love. But they size and shedding just meant they weren't for me, as a first timer at least. Loveable as they are.

Have you considered a show springer? They are a lot calmer thsn working springer but i am not sure what they are like with cats.

She is absolutely gorgeous! I have two labs, am trying to persuade my Mum to go for a Border when she eventually gets her dog (waiting for their much loved cat to no longer be with us first)