Our first dog

[Rosyrosehips]

Hello everyone, we are now in a position where we are looking to get a dog. Mondays I work 10am-1:30pm however I can bring the pup along! Tuesdays and Thursdays I work 7am-12pm and my partner 1pm-7pm, Fridays and Saturdays I work 10am-5pm and my partner is off, Wednesdays I work 10am-5pm; my partner 9am-5pm so my mum will be taking them for the day, she is extremely keen on this idea, she is unemployed and mainly potters around the house and goes on walks along the beach so she’d also love the companionship each week. Sundays, my partner works 9am-5pm however I am off every Sunday.
We would love a puppy to truly raise from scratch and bring up in the family, and to fit us perfectly.
We can offer 3 walks a day no issues, we are active (always enjoy a good long walk, there are many spots around here).
Our outings with friends usually entail café meet ups with their own dogs, sitting on the beach, long walks, paddle boarding and occasional UK trips.
We do have a garden, however it is not big enough for anything more than toilet breaks really, however this will hopefully be replaced with the walks.
We have had family dogs growing up, all rescues and all with many issues.

I would absolutely love a Border Collie, however I know this may be unrealistic.

Did you have a question, or is this more of a celebratory update?

Sorry?

Kindly, I agree - what was the point of your post OP?

To ask for suggestions on our first dog, based on our lifestyle?

Ok, that wasn't mentioned in the original post. You could ask MN to update your title to ask for breed recommendations?

Then not a border collie!!!!!!!!
Name some other breed you like.

Okay, but none of us have crystal balls, so how are we supposed to know that was your question??

it would appear from what you have written that there will be someone at home most of the time and your mum happy to be grandma to the puppy and have it one day a week (and possibly others randomly) you're active and happy to take it out on plenty of walks and also have a garden for toilet breaks & just to be outside.

Are there any other breeds you are interested in finding out about? I don't think a collie is a good idea. Personally, I love cocker spaniels, but they can be very hard work. Have you looked at the option of a poodle (it's not compulsory to get the daft haircut!!)

For info, I’ve had dogs for 50 years, from Great Danes, Rottweilers, German Shepherds, to Cavalier King Charles and Shi Tzu…..
They were all great dogs but I now have a Cavapoo, best little dog I’ve ever had.
Can run for England and snooze for England.
She’s a clever little thing and easy to train, loves being played with…. over lockdown to keep her mind occupied I named toys and asked her to fetch, until she knew the names of ten of them…
Theres the advantage of no shedding, offset by having to have her groomed every 6-8weeks.
But all in all, I would recommend her, if you do decide on having one though, make sure the poodle dad is a miniature not a toy, as then it will be long legged and a decent size.
Also, even though there’s someone at home most of the time, make sure you leave her alone from very early on, starting with literally stepping out the door, counting to ten and walking back in… don’t immediately make a fuss, sort of ignore for a few seconds then turn round and pat and say hello….
Just so you don’t get an insecure dog who pines for you…
Also if possible I’d feed raw and dried meat sticks for treats, once they’re older.
I’ve gone on a bit here but dogs are my big love in life, so if you ever need any advise, you can drop me a msg in you like.

A border collie is fine as long as you understand them, do your research on breeders and make sure they are health tested. So many now are suffering with HD when there is screening available.

I know lots of collies thriving in first dog homes.

Have you thought about what characteristics your ideal dog should have? How big - do you want a dog that you can carry, or do you not mind it taking up your entire sofa? Would you like a dog that can be groomed at home without much effort, or would you prefer one that has to visit a groomer's regularly? A cuddly dog, one that follows their people around, or maybe one that's more independent? An intelligent breed that needs something for their head or a job, or a dog that's just happy to tag along?

Your lifestyle sounds like it would suit a dog in general, but you need to be able to describe your perfect dog for someone else to be able to recommend anything to you, otherwise it just sounds like any dog would do. And no, don't get a border collie as your first dog, that's insane.

think about size? i have a newfoundland and a chihuahua, easy to pop the chi under your arm and clean up after, not so with the newfoundland. think about what size your parent can manage, especially if going for a large breed. Personally i dont think you can beat a labrador for their temperament, although be prepared for dirt. i lost my 15yr old lab this week and would give anything to have more time with him.

How old is your dm? Is she fit and well and capable of looking after a bigger dog?
If so I don’t think you can go far wrong with a retriever or labrador (if you don’t mind the moulting). They tend to love their grub which makes training easier.
If you want something small I do like a border terrier. Characterful and biddable little dogs that you can pick up with one arm which can be handy.
I wouldn’t be going for a poodle cross, despite their popularity I don’t know a single one that has no issues - they’re all either hyperactive, nervous or a bit snappy (and I know a fair few) but I’ve heard pure bred poodles make good pets.

It depends on what you are looking for tbh. I would also say that having dogs growing up is very different to owning dogs.

My mum bred Goldies so I grew up with Goldies (never less than three in the house at any time). Owning my first Goldie, as an adult, was like a slap in the face and it was an incredibly steep learning curve - and honestly it's part of the reason why I don't sell my puppies to first time owners.

@GelatinousDynamo is spot on on the advice given above. You need to carefully consider what sort of temperamental defects you are happy to put up with should the worst happen (because each breed is pre-disposed to them, despite what people say) and then what sort of physical issues you're willing to deal with (including health as they get older) and then things like shedding, drool, mouthing etc. Do you want a dog that's biddable? One that isn't? One that potentially cannot be left alone, ever? One that bonds to the family or to one person? Remember, every dog has been bred with a specific purpose in mind - labradors to retriever, terriers to hunt, Cavaliers to be companions etc - and 99.9% of the time, the dog you get will adhere to it's breed characteristics.

For example, I love Goldies. Genuinely cannot recommend them enough. People often describe them as perfect family dogs, loyal, energetic but not as high energy as a Collie. In many respects, that's right.

BUT, they are mouthy because of the way they have been bred to be working dogs - even as adults - which makes them a poor choice for people with young visiting or resident children IMO (the amount of adults I have helped to re-home, through my local breed club, because they have 'bitten' aka mouthed the resident child in a home is disgraceful), they are strong and they are sensitive (which makes training a delicate balance), they can be pre-disposed to undesirable behaviour (including resource guarding), they shed a lot, they drool, they are high maintenance (both in terms of energy, grooming but also intelligence etc), they come (if not properly bred) with a whole host of expensive, life-limiting health issues, they are also expensive to insure, feed and otherwise maintain. Overall I spend about £1K a month on my four - the youngest is 2 and his insurance alone is £80 a month.

So, when you're thinking about what dog to get - it's not just about what you can offer. It's about considering the breeds needs, attributes and characteristics and working out which would fit your lifestyle best and which one you can give the best life to.

I'd have loved a Border Collie. In theory, I could give one the perfect life. But am I the right owner for one? Hell no.

Yes a lot of people do shut others down immediately re border collies. They can make a good first or family dog. I’ve also seen this first hand. As you say you really need to do your research and obviously ensure it’s not from a working line but if you have the time and energy they are great dogs. The issue for me is not enough people do enough of a deep dive eg they can be quite neurotic and motion obsessed likely due to their heritage of working dogs where sight is so critical to their job. It’s also very hit and miss whether your BC will be a cuddler or not! It’s the breed I fell in love with from the age of 5 years and I’m 52 now lol. Had many opportunities to own a dog but have never yet committed as there’s always something that I feel I’m missing in order to provide the best home. Hopefully when I’m retired I’ll still have my health and then perhaps can grow old with one! 😊

If you're prepared to take a while to think about breed, you could go to Crufts next year and have a good look around and chat to breed enthusiasts. Do you know many dog owners? Ask them about the pros and cons of the breed(s) they own or have owned: energy levels, prey drive, drool, grooming, temperamental stability, health issues...

My main advice is that if you want a quiet life, avoid working lines. We've had working line dogs for >20 years, and while I love them, and spend hours training them, and work one of them, I'm the first to admit that they are bloody hard work, very full-on and not for everyone.

You describe your current lifestyle in detail, but a dog could be with you for 10 to 20 years. Do you expect your lives to remain the same or in a similar pattern for ten years? Is your mum at an early stage of retirement, for instance, or a lively 85 year old?

Please consider a rescue. My recent experience has been amazing. The rescue spent a lot of time getting to know us and our home before introducing us to any dogs. They selected a puppy who they thought would fit well with us. The support has been fantastic. Before we received our dog, we had an online preparation session with a behaviourist. Afterwards, we've had personal follow up meetings to check up on how we're doing and offer us advice. It's world's apart from our previous adoption experiences. I'm so impressed with how much support is available (if needed), it's not just pick up a puppy and then you're on your own. DDog has settled in fantastically and is a Very Good Boy.

Just joining in to say I got a working line Cocker/Lab cross as my first dog and it was an utterly idiotic decision. He is a year old now, and is the joy and light of my life, and it's a good job he is as otherwise I'd have sold him for kebabs months ago. He is constant hard work and, as I said on another thread recently, I walk 20,000 steps a day with him to give him the minimum he needs by way of sniffing, being outwitted by squirrels, and exercise in general. He wants my attention all the time he's awake, and can't nap unless he's touching me (he's currently asleep on my foot). He's wonderful, clever, funny and gorgeous and the best decision I ever made but bloody hell. Someone once told me a dog should fit around your life and to make the hollow laughter there's barely any of my previous life left to fit around. I'm two stone lighter, mind.

tl/dr: don't get a working line anything unless you're prepared to either work them or upend your life to give them what they need.

I think maybe a Spaniel type might be better suited than a border collie- all the ones I know are slightly bonkers (they are Agility & Flyball nutters!)
Are you able/ prepared to go regular training class for the first 12-18 months of having a puppy/ dog. That would be my biggest concern reading your schedule. Formal training class beyond the initial puppy training group is soo important for you and your dog.

Border terrier might be more appropriate . Is there a chance your mum will get a job ? there is quite a difference between retired / not working and unemployed and that would be a full day to cover .

@Bupster you should embrace your dog and do some K9 sports!
I have a bouncy ,neurotic cookerpoo. In the end I took her agility training as couldn't cope with the never ending jumping! Best thing I have done! Dog is calmer and happier! Plus, a good trainer will teach you & the dog some distance control as you can't be joined at the hip.... unless you fancy crawling through a tunnel or climbing up an A- frame 🤔.

I can't recommend a breed but having gone from a smooth black tan mini dach to a bichon frise I'd definitely think about how much time, money and effort you're happy to spend on grooming.

I'd go for a small, sturdy and active dog, such as a border terrier, a cairn terrier or miniature poodle.

Whatever you choose, invest in training as much as possible.
The dog ownership experience varies massively depending to the training.
Walking a dog off-lead in the park and chatting with other owners whilst dogs are burning energy by playing peacefully doesn't happen by accident.

Excellent advice regarding breed traits and NOT working lines. I’ve had border collies since a teenager. They all need a job or they’ll find one. Don’t let them practice any unwanted behaviour from the get go. Invest in training - obedience, agility, tricks and they’re the best dog ever. Beware of those with “plenty of eye” as they’ll struggle in a domestic environment. Border collie trust rehome throughout the uk. Or a pup from a reputable show breeder who cares and health checks - eyes, hips, epilepsy to name some. Good luck on your quest x