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When to get a new dog?

43 replies

Callie247 · 24/04/2025 14:12

I lost my adored dog at 13 years old at the weekend. I had been anticipating the end for the last few months and knew it was coming. He died at home very peacefully so I didn't have to make that awful decision which has made the grief a little easier as it was a natural end. I do want another but am still processing the loss and don't want to rush but also don't want an empty home too long.

Does a couple of months seem too soon? The one I just lost actually came to me two months after a previous dog died and I found having him helped to heal. He didn't replace the last dog because he couldn't and likewise I don't want to replace him because I can't.

I feel that I can still have enough room in my heart to love him and process the loss while also having room to give another a loving home. At the moment it isn't just about the one I lost. I also feel like I have lost part of my own identity because I have always had a dog in the house but now there's just emptiness and silence.

So does a couple of months seem too soon or is it a reasonable time frame to bring another dog into the house to help heal the void? I currently feel like the only thing that can take away that emptiness left behind by the loss of a dog, is another dog.

Of course I feel sad and cry because I miss him and feel the grief of his passing, but I also want to think about the future. Right now a future with no dog makes me feel even more sad and empty. I feel like I lost my own purpose when he went and the only way I can find myself again is by embracing the grief but opening my heart and home to another dog.

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LandSharksAnonymous · 24/04/2025 14:19

It's whatever works for you - whatever will make you happiest. Personally, even if I didn't breed...I would always have several dogs because the thought of not having one is just awful.

But, remember, unless you go for a rescue then you'll have to wait anyway. A good breeder won't have pups readily available. So if this is something you're considering, why not talk to breeders near you and see when they might have litters? That'll give you something to look forward to as well?

I'm so sorry for your loss. 13 is a great age but no matter how long they're with us, it never seems like long enough.

Callie247 · 24/04/2025 14:51

LandSharksAnonymous · 24/04/2025 14:19

It's whatever works for you - whatever will make you happiest. Personally, even if I didn't breed...I would always have several dogs because the thought of not having one is just awful.

But, remember, unless you go for a rescue then you'll have to wait anyway. A good breeder won't have pups readily available. So if this is something you're considering, why not talk to breeders near you and see when they might have litters? That'll give you something to look forward to as well?

I'm so sorry for your loss. 13 is a great age but no matter how long they're with us, it never seems like long enough.

Totally with you. He had a wonderful life and I have got so much happiness to look back on that I don’t want to only feel sadness at the loss. I knew it was coming and was expecting it so this wasn’t a sudden unexpected passing.

He was a Rottweiler and 13 is almost unheard of in the breed. He really did have the most incredible life and I’m so thankful that I had him with me for so long. I had his cousin before and the last 20 years there’s just not been a time I haven’t had one by my side, and if I’m honest as sad as I am to be without him, I struggle as much at the emptiness and loss of myself own identity.

for 20 years I’ve got up ridiculously early to do breakfasts and walks, then suddenly just silence and emptiness and this just isn’t who I am. It doesn’t take away from my love for him but I don’t want to spent the rest of the year grief stricken when I had so much to be thankful for and so many happy memories with him. Even the ending was what I always thought was the perfect way because he decided himself when to go and I didn’t have that awful guilt of his final moments being surrounded with strangers in unfamiliar settings because he made the decision for me.

I do feel that a new life will help to heal the void I’ve been left with. I suppose I just worry about being judged but nothing would ever take away my love for him and sadness that I had to let him go.

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MadisonAvenue · 24/04/2025 15:17

I’m so sorry, it’s heartbreaking when we lose them.

We lost our 12 year old GSD x Collie last August and there’s not a day gone by when I haven’t been upset.
Our boy was diabetic for his last three years and had cataract surgery so there was a strict routine of feeding and insulin injections every 12 hours (6am and 6pm) and also two lots of eye drops morning and evening too, and walks. When he’d gone I lost that routine and found it really difficult. I’ve felt so adrift for the last 8 months. I’ve walked our woodland walks on my own of course but felt so lonely and ended up in tears on occasions.

Anyway, we’ve now got a 4 months old rescue puppy. He’s been here for just two weeks and he’s wonderful, love him to bits. Having a dog in the house again has helped enormously, he’s made me feel like me again if that makes sense.

Gundogday · 24/04/2025 15:20

Do what’s right for you. Some people take months before being ready, others feel the need to fill the gap straight away.

My sister lost her dog a few weeks ago and has already decided to get a new dog. She was waiting until after her holiday, but has started the search at rescue centres already as she’s been
advised it can take time.

Callie247 · 24/04/2025 16:04

At the moment I have an opportunity in a couple of months. I know of a breeder with a litter due soon who will be related to by old boy so the bloodlines will mean a part of him goes on. Of course there are no guarantees they have enough pups but this won't be til in the summer anyway, and I just feel that by then I will be ready to start again, not as a replacement of him of course but to have another dog in the house to cure this dreadful emptiness.

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tsmainsqueeze · 24/04/2025 16:13

I am so sorry for your loss, i work in a vets and have my own 3 so i really do understand how special these relationships are.
13 years for a rottweiler is amazing !
In my job it is always a pleasure to see a once heartbroken owner come back with their new dog no matter how soon , do what feels right for you .

Callie247 · 24/04/2025 17:32

tsmainsqueeze · 24/04/2025 16:13

I am so sorry for your loss, i work in a vets and have my own 3 so i really do understand how special these relationships are.
13 years for a rottweiler is amazing !
In my job it is always a pleasure to see a once heartbroken owner come back with their new dog no matter how soon , do what feels right for you .

Thank you so much. I knew of someone with an old rotty and they took him in the car for his favourite walk and when they pulled up at home and opened the door to let him out, they realised he’d gone in his sleep in the back of the car. I always thought it was the perfect ending because he chose his own ending and decided himself. I wished my boy would have the same end and choose himself and he did. We booked the vet appointment for 11.30am to say goodbye Monday morning and just after 8am he made the decision himself and went to sleep while I laid on the floor holding him and stroking him. I almost find it easier that I didn’t have to make that awful decision because he chose himself to go at home instead.

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Letsgoforaskip · 24/04/2025 17:41

That sounds like an absolutely perfect ending. Sorry for your loss.
I agree with all the PP, you do whatever feels right for you. I have recently got a new rescue dog and regret not getting her sooner. I have got another older dog and wanted to see how he got on being the only dog after losing one last summer. He has shown me that he is definitely happier with his new friend.
As you’ve said, every dog is different and your relationship with them will be unique. It sounds brilliant that you might be able to have a puppy who was related to him. Almost meant to be!

tsmainsqueeze · 24/04/2025 18:00

It is such a blessing when they go to sleep at home ,just peacefully drift away.

Callie247 · 24/04/2025 18:18

tsmainsqueeze · 24/04/2025 18:00

It is such a blessing when they go to sleep at home ,just peacefully drift away.

It is. He made the decision himself and it was peaceful. I’m so grateful for the replies. I think I’ll wait the couple of months then I’ll know if the time is right. I’ve loved every moment with my old boy and couldn’t have asked for a better ending for him.

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Lascivious · 24/04/2025 18:26

Do what feels right. Our dog died and we moped around, completely heartbroken for 2 or 3 weeks, then I looked for puppies on the kennel club website. I think it was 3 weeks after he died that we viewed a litter and maybe 7 weeks until we collected our new pup.

We still talk about our beloved old dog but getting a puppy was exactly what we needed. If you have a dog in your lives, a dog-less house seems pretty sad and empty.

Fennelseeds · 24/04/2025 18:29

I've just lost my dog a week ago and cannot contemplate ever getting another. I loved him so much and can't imagine living another the same.
However, I got him about 3/4 months after losing my previous dog. I couldn't bear the house without a dog and he stole my heart immediately.

Glitchymn1 · 24/04/2025 18:44

Firstly, I’m very sorry for your loss.

It’s whenever you feel you can. I lost my beautiful boy this year, let’s just say people think I’m on ozempic, struggling to eat, lost weight, unable to think properly, consumed with grief (and I have DH, DD 9, DM, I work). Life is full, yet empty.

DH has gone on and on about a dog, so we are getting one now. I have mixed emotions, but I think it’ll be good for me. I am doing a bit better now, but god it’s hard.

I just try to think that having another dog after a few months isn’t taking away the love I had for my boy. He will always be with me, my soul dog.

Callie247 · 26/04/2025 07:18

Little wobble yesterday and some tears when this arrived in the post. A very kind thought from my vet with a packet of forget me not seeds inside which I’ve planted. It’s the mornings I find hardest without a dog in my life.

When to get a new dog?
OP posts:
MadisonAvenue · 26/04/2025 09:24

That’s lovely OP. We were sent some forget me not seeds by our dog’s eye vet but I’ve not planted them yet as we plan to move in the next year and I will want them at the new house.

Mornings are so difficult without a dog.

We were talking and looking through photos on our phones last night, just generally looking at photos, and I had to stop. Sometimes I can look at photos of our beautiful old boy and smile and other times it’s too upsetting.

Anyway, this is our new boy ❤️ who has been wanting to play since 5am 🤦🏼‍♀️

When to get a new dog?
Callie247 · 26/04/2025 09:50

MadisonAvenue · 26/04/2025 09:24

That’s lovely OP. We were sent some forget me not seeds by our dog’s eye vet but I’ve not planted them yet as we plan to move in the next year and I will want them at the new house.

Mornings are so difficult without a dog.

We were talking and looking through photos on our phones last night, just generally looking at photos, and I had to stop. Sometimes I can look at photos of our beautiful old boy and smile and other times it’s too upsetting.

Anyway, this is our new boy ❤️ who has been wanting to play since 5am 🤦🏼‍♀️

Edited

Oh how lovely. He can come and play ay my house ❤️

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Eggsinthewhoopsiebasketalready · 26/04/2025 09:57

We lost our rotty in 2020. She was 10 and a half. She was pts at the vets . It crushed me tbh. Glad your old boy was in the best place..
The first time after we lost her on a trip to Whitby had me in tears when I saw one. That poor couple! They are wonderful ddogs.
Op if you find a perfect litter please let me know! We have other ddogs but are hoping for a rotty pup in the future. No other ddog measures up!
So sorry for your loss..

Letsgoforaskip · 26/04/2025 11:49

@MadisonAvenue he is just divine. Well worth the early mornings 😀

Gundogday · 26/04/2025 18:22

MadisonAvenue · 26/04/2025 09:24

That’s lovely OP. We were sent some forget me not seeds by our dog’s eye vet but I’ve not planted them yet as we plan to move in the next year and I will want them at the new house.

Mornings are so difficult without a dog.

We were talking and looking through photos on our phones last night, just generally looking at photos, and I had to stop. Sometimes I can look at photos of our beautiful old boy and smile and other times it’s too upsetting.

Anyway, this is our new boy ❤️ who has been wanting to play since 5am 🤦🏼‍♀️

Edited

Adorable. What breed?

Callie247 · 08/05/2025 15:43

Just thought I’d update the thread. She’s not quite old enough to come home yet but this is Ava. She’s related to my last dog by around 5th or 6th cousin.

When to get a new dog?
OP posts:
Eggsinthewhoopsiebasketalready · 08/05/2025 16:47

Omg op was there any left needing a loving home?

Callie247 · 08/05/2025 17:45

Eggsinthewhoopsiebasketalready · 08/05/2025 16:47

Omg op was there any left needing a loving home?

As far as I’m aware they all have homes now ❤️

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Eggsinthewhoopsiebasketalready · 08/05/2025 17:56

Bloody shame!! Though dh is probably relieved.... We have 3 although doubtful 2 will see the year out.... Devastating..
Keep us posted with your dpup though!!

spiderlight · 08/05/2025 18:55

She's beautiful! I hope you have many, many happy years together 💕

Gundogday · 08/05/2025 18:56

She’s lovely, and congratulations.

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