Cocker separation anxiety at night

[CeciliaMars]

Hi, we have a 5 month old cocker puppy, not our first dog. We are trying to crate train, but he just cries when he's left! We've tried bringing the crate upstairs. We've tried leaving him to cry it out. But we haven't kids who he wakes up, and we're semi detached so worried about waking the neighbours. The only thing that works right now is me or my husband sleeping on the sofa with him. Help - advice please!

Have you tried the crate in your bedroom? I remember when my cocker was a tiny puppy this is what we did with him. Does he ever get left alone in the day?

How are you crate training? Are you building up the time pup spends alone? 10 seconds, 20 seconds, 40 seconds etc? Rewarding as appropriate?

Will he sleep in your room, not in the crate? Some dogs just don’t like crates.

What size is the crate? We followed the guidelines but actually the crate was too small and he felt cramped. A larger crate made him more comfy. Lots of cushioning on the bottom too so he's not on a hard surface.

When we had our cocker pup our older dog slept downstairs in the laundry and we didn’t want to leave them together to start with so pup slept in our en-suite (which has the benefit of any accidents not being a big deal as it was tiles).

If he's crying when he's left then it's all too much for him. You need to build up loads of positive associations with the crate while you're around before you even start to think about leaving him alone in it.

He's not ready to be left alone, I'm afraid. Leaving him to cry it out will only make it worse. Can you have him in your bedroom? Otherwise one of you on the sofa, and eventually moving him further and further from you, or going upstairs once he's asleep but allowing him to come and find you.

I wondered what breeds your previous dogs were? Cockers can be real velcro dogs - some are fine left alone, mine (half cocker) couldn't be left in a crate even by my bed and has slept with me since the second night I brought him home. He doesn't even like to eat unless I'm in the room with him 🙄Someone on a cocker spaniel group once described them as wanting to unzip you and climb inside...

He needs to be with you unless you want to risk full separation anxiety. There is never any need for sleepless nights with a puppy. It’s hard enough as it is!

Agree with others.

Cockers are incredibly sensitive. You need to nip this in the bud now - and by that I mean you need to co-sleep with him and not leave him to cry it out or put him in a crate when he's clearly unhappy- before it settles in as a permanent behaviour. Cockers are very prone to SA so you need to go at his speed, not yours, and accept a few sleepless nights.

Sorry, OP, but not every dog can be crate trained and some breeds are worse for SA than others.

Every dog can be crate trained but I think people confuse leaving their dog to cry in a crate until they give up and actual crate training which takes months of building value in the crate so the dog chooses to be in there. For the average pet owner a crate has little value as the work involved to train is immense for some dogs. I used a crate for my pup as a tiny overnight but she was put in asleep then let out as she was waking so she never felt trapped. It just kept her safe if she woke up (which sleeping beside us she never did). I trained over months as I need to be able to crate at dog shows. It took over a year.

Message received! Our first dog was half cocker but nothing like this... I think we need to completely rethink...
It's not ideal having him upstairs with us as he still has accidents and is still chewing everything in sight!

The FB group dog training advice and support has great advice on how to crate train.

I found with mine that it was easier to toilet train when he was with me overnight than friends found it, because he was always in my sight - and at least you can see what he's chewing and rescue it! (sometimes at any rate...)

If he's in a crate then he can't chew, surely?

We've tried him in a crate upstairs and he still cries. So the next step would be upstairs, not in a crate. We could wake up to chewer duvet/pillows/clothes...

If he cries in the crate even when you're right there, then you're going too quickly (in terms of crate training). He may surprise you if you let him sleep next to you in a bed or pen.

Pen him into an area beside you and leave the crate open. It may take a few nights but he’ll start sleeping in there eventually. If he sleeps well he won’t get up to mischief 🙂

Hi! I know this is from ages ago but what happened in the end? In a very similar situation

You need to stay with your pup if it’s anxious.

Let him in your bed, you can soon hoover in the morning. X

Ours sleeps in the kitchen not in a crate though. When he cried I’d go in, pet and talk to him, hand him a toy and leave quickly (even if he was still crying). A while later I’d go in again and do the same. After a few days I’d sit in the hall and just call in ‘you’re ok’ when he cried. Finally he just started sleeping. They’re clingy dogs unfortunately (and fortunately obviously because he’s my right hand and a legend).

Sorry just saw this is a zombie thread!