Your dug might be friendly but that is irrelevant

[WTFMartin]

I have a small dog who is reactive to other dogs and we have been training him to not do this and after months and months we have got to the point where we can walk past other dogs and he no longer barks or reacts and will walk past quietly.
Only for me to take him out last week and this week and for two dogs to come running up to from across the park and circle round him, thereby frightening him and causing him stress. Both times I ask the owner to please get the dog under control, the response ‘he/she just wants to play’. I don’t give a monkeys chunky if they do, my dog does not. If my dog was a larger dog then they wouldn’t be quite so keen to let theirs run up. However, they clearly do not have good recall and so minimise the dog running up to other dogs.
When calling out the owner for being an arse the response is that it’s my fault! I accept my dog shouldn’t be reactive and I am working bloody hard to train him to stop it and would not let him off a lead if I thought for one minute he would chase after another dog or harass another dog.
My dog has now gone backwards and I will need to work hard to get him back to where he was just because of selfish bloody owners. Rant over…..

I can’t remember the exact wording, but my friend has land and her dogs are pretty much a pack, all adopted rescue dogs - other than friends dogs they don’t tend to meet other dogs unless they are at the vets.
Her response to the owner or a ‘friendly’ dog is something along the line of “my dog isn’t, and is just as likely to rip yours apart”

…… her wording is less graphic but to the same point
Her dogs are a bunch of softy’s, but softy’s that love ‘rough and tumble’ and don’t know their own strength

I hear you. My ddog can be reactive still. Done loads of work. Lots of owners understand when I tell them she's a grumpy thing and to keep their dogs away, but there's at least one twit a week who thinks there dogs needs (to say hello)trump my dogs needs (to feel safe)...

I completely get you, and then you get judged as the person with the 'untrained yappy reactive small dog' when yours is the one on the lead and you are trying to avoid other dogs, but hey their dogs are friendly so having a good recall isn't required!

Even when I had my other dog who was a great big retriever who loved everyone and everything I still made sure he did not go up to other dogs uninvited even if he was off the lead. I do get annoyed when people blame me/my dog for their lack of control/training.

Totally agree. I had a super friendly dog who tended to jump up - I kept him on a leash unless I was sure the other dogs/people were happy with this or we were alone. My other dog doesn't mind a quick sniff but is not playful and doesn't like it when another dogs pays her too much attention - she'll give a short bark as a warning (though doesn't do anything else). So yep get the 'he's friendly' shouted from across the park. I don't care - get your dog away from mine please.
But people are oblivious. It was really annoying in a pet groomers the 'house dog' would not leave mine alone while I was paying. Mine was on a leash the other dog was free. I told the girl: 'she doesn't like that other dog'. I was met with a blank look. Again I said 'she doesn't like the dog can you take him away'. Again a bemused look. I said for the third time: look my dog is going to get very upset any second if you don't get that dog away from her!' Idiots. Never went back (they also did a poor job grooming her which I would have complained about but just needed to get out of there asap).

Trust me, they dont give a shit if they let their dogs run up to big dogs. They think their smaller dogs get a pass, running up and yapping and snapping.

Solidarity

I hear you OP, it's so frustrating.

I have a beagle who's reactive because two tiny off-lead terriers charged at him as a puppy, knocked him over and bit him several times he's much better than he was but still hates small dogs running over to him and gets really stressed.

The amount of times I've had to yell "yours might be friendly, but he isn't, so can you get your bloody dog" is ridiculous.

Yes, the "don't worry they're friendly" shitty dog owners. It never occurs to them that your dog might not be. It's always the ones who have no control over their dogs too. Zero recall means your dog should not be off lead. Running after your dog shouting at it until you can catch it, is not recall.

I was walking my dog on-lead in the park the other day. She's a bit complicated but is like any dog and just needs managing around other dogs. More than some, less than others.
I saw a little JRT running around, chasing squirrels, going into the fenced off children's play area where there were kids playing, running around in a crazy over-stimulated state. I had a look around for an owner and saw a woman who was doing nothing other than watching him. Figured it must be her dog but wasn't sure.
He charged over to us and it was ok but mine got a bit leapy and jumpy. He returned a couple of times and the last time we were near an exit so I had to turn her round so he didn't follow us out onto the road.
He was wearing a Julius K9 type harness with writing on. It said: In training.

Her response to the owner or a ‘friendly’ dog is something along the line of “my dog isn’t, and is just as likely to rip yours apart”

I used to say something like that at times if there was a 'friendly' boxer in the vicinity of my first dachshund. He'd once been accidentally stood on by an overexuberant one which hurt his eye, ever after he was after their blood (or possibly the :- if you know what that means)

We never allow our dog to approach another dog especially if the dog is on a lead. We will call her the moment we see another dog and tell her not to approach dog and to stay with us. If the dog barks or appears anxious we put her on the lead immediately and move away. I’m not taking the risk. On the occasion she hasn’t listened the first time and defied us and gone too close (she is in teenage phase) she is put back on the lead the rest of the walk but this doesn’t happen very often. My main worry is my friendly dog getting a bite for getting too close to another dog who doesn’t like her, so it’s my job to stop her doing it it’s not the other dogs fault. I just always assume a dog on a lead is on a lead for a good reason too.

Was your dog on the lead or off-lead? If off-lead, I guess there was an assumption that he was ok to mix with other dogs off lead.

In our area, people are very good at putting dogs back on the lead if they see a dog on the lead, apart from in the park, where there’s a bit more freedom.

Yes, this. If you don't want to do this then maybe one of those nervous dog harnesses might help warn other people.

My dog was on lead and close to me. I don’t want to put a nervous dog harness on my dog. He was doing very well, and I have been able to walk closely past other dogs without him reacting for several months. I don’t see why I should have to alter my behaviour or label my dog due to poor dog owners who have zero control over their own dogs.
I don’t believe a dog should be off lead in a park if there is no recall, the park makes no difference.

In that case, yes, they were definitely wrong.

I had a situation in the past when a small off-lead dog was aggressive to my on-lead dog. The owner had the cheek to say their dogs doesn’t like dogs that are on the lead. Keep your dog to the free-running area of the park then, and not the path!

Fortunately, though, must owners seeing my dog on-lead will put their dog on the lead, or call it close to their side.

I don’t believe a dog should be off lead in a park if there is no recall

Yes, it really is that simple. A dog needs to be under your control.

People around here are generally pretty good. Off course sometimes people misjudge the situation but then they're more likely to be apologetic than blasé.
You've got the misfortune to share your park with an idiot arsehole.

It’s not just other dogs. I got slobbered on by a dog the other day and was told when he ran up to me ‘oh don’t worry he’s friendly’ I don’t give a crap, I didn’t ask for him to come and say hello and I certainly didn’t ask for a trouser leg full of slobber. But apparently it’s ok because he’s friendly. Makes me mad.

I got a bright orange neon sleeve goes over the lead,then I realised it wasn't seen when off the lead so another one goes over the harness,it says "reactive please give space", year old border collie,hers says nervous. People still ignore, but then I politely point out,it's big enough bright enough, got them made up on eBay.

My dog doesn't like anyone running upto him and he's on the lead for that reason, the idiots who let their dogs run up to us after being asked to recall , put there dogs in the lead... would definitely think twice about doing it again, I've had to pick my dog up once for an over friendly dog and ended up bit by the other dog , now I carry a water spray which appears to deter them funnily enough and the if the owner has an issue that's their problem... control your dog , simple as that.

The same people do it to non-dog owners, too. Yes, I'm sure Fido is lovely but he's twice the size of my terrified toddler!

I accept that during recall training there may be occasions it doesn’t go 100% correct but then I’d expect to see the owner frantically trying. I think I live in a mostly well trained dog area as we don’t see this much but general rule is if the dog is on a lead, you recall your dog.

Totally agree with you OP. I have a larger reactive dog and the only difference this makes (compared to having a smaller reactive dog) is that some people get very unpleasant about him when he reacts to their smaller off lead dog pestering him whilst on lead. We have been training him for a long time and he will walk past other dogs, and even try his best to ignore off lead dogs who approach. But if an off-lead dog runs up to him and will not go away even though we are trying to move away and he's attempting to use body language to tell the dog that he's not interested, he will growl and bark. I have been told by the owners of several of these dogs (who have zero recall but are never on lead) that he is aggressive (he's not, but is muzzled when in public just for peace of mind) and should not be out in public if he is not trained to mix with other dogs. The owner of an off lead jack russell type dog who followed us, nipped at my dog's legs and barked at us (whilst she tried to catch it, when she eventually noticed) informed me that she had no need to put her dog on a lead, or teach recall, as my dog should be better trained if we were going to walk him on public paths.

We have an excellent dog behaviourist and her view on the 'my dog's friendly' brigade is that actually their dogs are not well socialised as they do not have 'doggy manners'. My reactive dog first tries to use his body language to tell them to back off, but them in her words- if they don't pick up on it and back off when told, he can't be blamed for telling them to fuck off in no uncertain terms. Which makes me feel a bit better, but does nothing to calm the anxiety caused to my dog by these idiots.

“… if they don't pick up on it and back off when told, he can't be blamed for telling them to fuck off in no uncertain terms.”

So true.

But you can't control what other people do with their dogs however much you might want to! I shouldn't have to lock my door at night but I do because it's better than getting burgled. You shouldn't have to put your dog on a lead or put a nervous dog harness, but it might be better than the alternative of having dogs running up to you?

It really shouldn't matter. You shouldn't let your dog aproach anyone or anything. On or off lead.

My dog goes off lead but he doesn't want to play with or be jumped on by other dogs