How do you know it's the end?

[mondaytosunday]

I have a 15 year old dog. A month ago he had an annual wellness check. Aside from being a bit slow, very deaf and a bit blind (he has cataracts), the vet thought he was fine. But in the last month he has gone down hill rapidly, and now needs help to stand up. He can walk stiff legged. He still eats ok and toilets outside, he goes on short walks. But he's panting a lot (a sign of pain) and lost 10% of his body weight in three weeks.
The vet thinks he has cancer. He has a swollen eye and discharge from his nose. He was sneezing (no longer), and has been on steroids and antibiotics and painkillers.
Two vets said we should consider putting him to sleep, as he wouldn't tolerate anaesthesia for a biopsy or any further treatment.
So I'm in two minds. It's a quality of life question, but how do I judge that? He eats, he goes on short walks, he is near us. So we have to help him stand up. He can still climb the stairs. He is in some discomfort but I have no idea how much. My kids say wait. The vets say it's this week. He's had a course of steroids and antibiotics and now painkillers. He's lying next to me now, awake but kinda out of it. I suppose he could be like this for a few weeks, but is it fair? I am torn,

Sorry, OP, it’s time. Book the appointment and spoil him rotten in the run up, then give him the last kind act of love you can. It’s the worst thing - but imagine how awful it would be to have him suddenly deteriorate and be rushing to a strange OOH vet in the middle of the night in crisis mode.

It’s time, OP.

It isn’t easy and I really empathise.

Listen to your vet.
Sounds like your dog has quite poor quality of life. It's the hardest and kindest decision you have to make for your old friend xx

Had this recently - leaving them is unkind.

If his time is up a week or two extra life in pain isn’t worth it. Let him go with dignity.

Keep the happy memories alive.

Aww 🥰 bless him . I agree it's time . If you can get the vet out to you for it to be done at home , thats nicer for you both . I really feel for you , I had to make that call twice last year and it broke me . It's very painful losing a beloved pet . Sending love xx

It's time,as much as you want to keep him forever you can't, he's old and quality of life isn't that great, don't allow him to struggle on in pain, let him go .It's hard, I've had to make this decision twice now but it's the right thing to do for him.

As the owner of a dog who is my entire world, who I would walk through fire for, I agree with this poster. You have give your darling boy a wonderful life with so much love and joy. Be kind to him and put him out of his misery.

So so sorry OP.

It's time and will be the kindest thing you can do for your boy.

We had to make the decision really quickly for our girl just 4 days ago, when she became acutely unwell just a couple of weeks after her kidney function started deteriorating.

We're bereft without her but we trusted our vet and took their advice that it was time. We know it was our responsibility to do the right thing. We were pretty much in shock the first couple of days because she went down hill so quickly.

Please make the appointment and enjoy what time you have left with your best boy, knowing you've done your best for him

Much as a previous poster said, I lost my cat last year due to a sudden deterioration after a routine op. We had to rush him to the emergency vet in the early hours and he was taken away from us to be worked on and didn't make it. I am wracked with guilt not to have been with him at the end, even though I couldn't have done anything differently. If you can give your boy a peaceful, loving, fear-free end on your own terms it's the absolute kindest thing you can do. Still gut-wrenching though, sending you lots of love and strength x

You are the adult, you know it is time - please do not let your children influence your decision and the advice / opinion of 2 vets.

You know deep down what you have to do or you would not be asking here.

It is hard.

however it is time.

make your decision if the dog is to be cremated or buried and if buried - where. If cremated, do you want his ashes back, and if so what would you like to do with them.
decide if any of the children are old enough to be present and if so if they could cope with it.

then phone the vet and make the appointment.

i am so sorry.

In my experience, if the vet is suggesting it's time, it is. They don't suggest that lightly.

We had a cat PTS last year. I had mixed feelings but I had to look at the situation - he wasn't having a good time anymore, he had medical issues that couldn't be satisfactorily managed. It was the kindest thing to do.

It's so hard, I'm sorry OP.

Hi OP - it's probably time. I waited till my beloved collie cross was 16, blind, deaf and beginning to fall down the stairs before I made the decision. But be prepared. I'd never gone through something like this before so I had a rosy picture that - timewise - it would at least be quick and easy - just an injection. I wish someone had warned me, or I'd thought it through, so I would have been better prepared mentally. Vets don't walk around with lethal injections, as I had imagined. Of course, not. They might fall and stab themselves, or you. They have to fit a canula (sp?) Sometimes they have trouble (finding a vein? I don't know?), before they can go ahead. This might be self-evident to most people, but it wasn't to me, so it was a much more lengthy procedure than I'd envisaged. Just be prepared for that. My wonderful wolf was OK throughout, but it broke me that it took so long. I wish someone had warned me about the practicalities.

So sorry this is happening to you.

I know how very difficult it is but I agree. Let him go before he gets any worse. It's heartbreaking but the kindest thing you can do.

With my old boy I hoped he'd go naturally. But like the vet said what if he'd died at night whilst we slept but died in pain alone? She came to our home and he died very peacefully on his bed. I carried him to the van of the private cremation service still in his bed. It was very dignified.

Sending love and support as I know it's so very hard ❤️

Oh, @mondaytosunday we had this awful decision last week.
If the vets are saying it's time, it is time. They usually say it's up to you.
I always say to friends better a day early than a day too late, I really struggled with our boy though.
Remember it's the last kindness we can do for our beloved pets.
Our vet delivered our boy 12 years ago and talked to him throughout, reminding him of the daft things he had done, it was painless and peaceful.
I hope it is the same for your old boy.

A vet never advocates to PTS a dog unless they believe the dogs suffering is intolerable - they just can’t take the risk

I’m really sorry, but you need to do what’s right for your dog.

I'm sorry but it's time. I was there 3 weeks ago. Listen to your vet. Best to do this a day early than a day too late. Spoil him rotten in the meantime time. Xx

Thanks all. Whoever mentioned it above my kids are over 18! My son was visiting this weekend and said good bye to him (made me go out to the car and wait).
It's the last connection to my husband who died unexpectedly just after we got him, the last trip we all did as a family was to collect him.
I'm pretty pragmatic- I've had so many pets in my life but I just realised this is the first time I've actually had to make the decision.
We will call the vets today.

Take care ❤️

My previous dog saw the vet like that three weeks before he was PTS. At the earlier visit the vet said he was in good shape and with a good quality of life. But things went downhill one overnight and it was clear it was the end. He was nearly 16.

I’m so sorry about your husband.

Sending hugs and support, OP. It's so hard to lose a fur pal, especially when they have been with you for so long. Sending your lovely boy an ear-ruffle and a belly-rub

I had to go through this recently with a rabbit, whom I adored. When we went in, I said to the vet that I wasn’t sure it was exactly the right day and she replied that we didn’t want to wait until he was flat on his back with his paws in the air. They always say, better two days too early than a day too late.

I have been present when two animals were PTS. One was very quick and this one was slow and gentle. He ate some banana whilst the first injection was taking effect to make him groggy. He was not aware of the next two.

It had to be done and it was my final gift to him. I accepted the pain of making the decision so that he would not have to endure anymore. That was my responsibility. The enduring sadness is that there had to be an end to our time together. That’s unavoidable.

I know what you mean about making the decision alone. I had to make the decision to have my dog pts last year, and my elderly cat this year. My partner is in a care facility, so it was all down to me. It felt like a really heavy responsibility (always done things like this together before), but was the last act of care I could do. Thinking of you and your very good boy💜

He's gone. Was very peaceful. My daughter is devastated but it was time. I've asked for his ashes.

I'm glad it was peaceful.