Advice needed!

[WhatHaveIdone345]

Help! I just adopted a 7 month old puppy - advertised as a mix breed rolly poly dog, looooves people, basic training done, house trained, would make a great therapy dog , size small to medium

I thought this sounded great, as I have austistic children and this would fit our family.
Well, he arrived and he's huge. And not house trained. And does not know how to walk in a lead. And definitely does not like people! He shys away and won't let me pat him. The rescue lady who dropped him off said he would likely be a bit nervous.

It took me ages to catch him and put him in his crate and now hes in there howling. My children are sobbing because they can't cope with the noise. I've messaged the rescue place and they've said oh thats normal for the first day.

Is it??? I feel like the dog is the opposite of what we wanted 😭😭😭

@QueenofLouisiana thank you, that is a very helpful chart. I'm hoping once he settles we will see an indication of his true nature. If he truly is an aloof dog, that doesn't like lots of company, then we will have to return him.

Try and see if you can return him.
He will take a lot of time and effort to make him a good family pet and it sounds like you are not able to do that.
I suspect you are stuck with him though, can you afford to bring in a Professional?

I've not chased him into a crate! I put his dinner in there and he went in, but he got upset when i closed the door

@sunsetsandboardwalks I've got a horrible feeling you might be right. This poor dog 😭

But even a ‘trained’ 7 month old isn’t going to be fully trained. A 7 month old that just turned up in a new home is also going to be anxious and distracted and that would impact wether it responds or not.

The fact that you caused the dog then put in the crate and just raised the dogs anxiety even more. Going to the toilet inside in a new surrounding also isn’t unheard of.

If you have had several rescues that arrive and have no issues, settle in immediately, fully trained and responds to training in the new environment and aren’t nervous at all, they you have been there you have been exceptionally lucky.

It takes times for a dog to settle. Time to be left alone to decompress. Not being chased, not having kids trying to pet them. You need to make time to settle a new dog in.

Feeding him loads of different foods isn’t going to help. If he ain’t used to them it could make his stomach bad and then you have a dog with runs and even more stressed out and unsettled.

Did they say he was crate trained?
You can't just expect a dog to arrive at a new home and be happy to be stuck in a crate

Oh, you said it took you ages to catch him to put in crate.
You’re feeling overwhelmed. He’s petrified and will be picking up on your feelings. Just let him be. Let him get used to you all and the new smells and noises etc. You seem to be expecting quite a lot at such an early stage.

Even crate trained dogs can sometimes find their own crate in a different position in their own house a bit much.

If the rescue stop responding or don't take him back then I think you need to find somewhere else who can take him.

Our area has a few people who will foster dogs like this while they find spaces in rescue - it may be worth asking around and saying you've been misled.

You ordered a dog online/over the phone and he was dropped off to you like an Amazon parcel without you ever meeting him, let alone getting to know him. You brought this dog into your house with your children.

Be glad that the worst you're dealing with is shit on the carpet.

You've been incredibly irresponsible and need to return the dog and not get another. Your comments about not being able to train a dog show that you're wholly unsuitable for dog ownership. Training needs to be a lifelong, ongoing commitment regardless of age or breed.

This sounds like a terrible rescue! Had yo unot met him at all before he was dropped off? The poor dog is as terrified and overwhelmed as you are. Has he come from kennels or a foster home? Leave him alone to decompress and scope out the place for now - don't force any interaction. If you really think he's too big and too much for you and your children, though, get in touch with the rescue sooner rather than later.

Sadly a 7 month old dog isn't a puppy. It's adolescent depending on size & breed.

Second, I don't think with your DC needs you should have a dog, unless you know it's been treated well and been cared for in a family environment.

Thirdly, forget about getting a dog for DC ... the dog, it's welfare and care are your responsibility. Therefore it will most likely be bonded to you as primary carer. Unless of course you have bought a special trained dog... and even then the dog might not be suitable for your family.

Lastly, you were sold a dream and the reality with most dreams is that they have either unrealistic or require hard work & commitment to come true.

I’m afraid the above is correct OP. The ‘rescue woman’ was more than likely a dog owner who wanted to pass the dog on.

I’d be trying to return the dog as soon as possible for both your family and the dog’s sake. Be prepared though, you may not be able to and you will more than likely lose your money.

So you have autistic children and no capacity to train a dog and yet you decided to take on a seven month old puppy that you hadn't even met? This is absolute madness and highly irresponsible of the "rescue" who are probably no such thing.
If you can get them to take him back then I would do that or see if somebody reputable like dogs trust would take him. Otherwise you are going to have to dig deep, get a 1-1 behaviourist and see if you can make this poor dog feel safe enough to become the family pet you were looking for.

At 7 months old he still has to go through adolescence- where even the best trained dogs lose all their knowledge!

Also dogs train to an owner, they aren’t just universally trained. For example my dog has perfect recall for us, his dog walker etc, all of us who have put in the time with training. But if a totally random person shouted his name in the park he wouldn’t recall to them. It’s not a case of training and then that working for all people all of the time, you have to put the time in, earn their trust, build the bond.

Also dogs train to an owner, they aren’t just universally trained. For example my dog has perfect recall for us, his dog walker etc, all of us who have put in the time with training. But if a totally random person shouted his name in the park he wouldn’t recall to them

Definitely this.

Our dog is very well trained and highly intelligent. She does what any of us (5 who live here) says but is most tuned into me...I swear that she reads my facial expressions, if I so much as raise an eyebrow at her she 'gets it' and jumps off the sofa/drops the sock or whatever. If my mum pops over and tells her to sit, ddog will glance at me first for unspoken confirmation that it's OK.

Lots of training is about the bond you have with your dog. It won't instantly listen to you just because you want it to.