Neighbour issues

[PresidentBarklett]

Hi all. Could use some advice. This may turn into a long one, for which I apologise! Thank you if you make it through to the end.

We live in an end of terrace house and have a 3 year old small dog. We get on very well with all of our nearest neighbours. However, over 2 years ago when our dog was a puppy we received a letter through the door regarding her barking. It was one of those forms you can download from the Council website to alert your neighbours to a disturbance. There were several inaccuracies on the form - for instance, the complainant stated that the dog barked all day, when actually she attends daycare every weekday and would not actually be in the house at this time. We also had a few sweary shouts when the dog was in the garden around this time which I'd assume were linked.

We were mortified to get this complaint. We engaged a dog trainer who helped us enormously. We stopped playing fetch with the dog in the garden. I personally visited all of my neighbours in close proximity to check if they heard anything during the hours when the dog was in the house. All confirmed they could hear her occasionally when she was in the garden but that the noise wasn't 'excessive'. Our next door neighbour (with whom we share a wall) stated that she couldn't hear the dog at all when she and our dogs were in their respective houses. The neighbourhood consensus was that our dog was being confused with several other dogs on the street and was the one assumed to be making all of the noise because she was the most visible, due to her habit of sitting at the window which fronts onto the street.

Fast forward 2 and a bit years and we've had no further complaints. We assumed the measures we had taken had worked. We still bring the dog in from the garden the moment she barks etc.

Yesterday I was out for a walk a few streets away with the dog and my dog had a bark at something. I immediately began to distracf, as taught by our trainer. A woman I'd never met walked past, stopped and proceeded to scream at me about my 'fucking nightmare dog'. She informed me she lived on my street and kept repeated 'that fucking dog is a nightmare, you need to fucking sort her out'. She told me i was a 'fucking horrible woman'. When I say screamed, I'm not kidding. She really went for it for a good few minutes whilst I stood there stammering.

When I got a word in, I invited her to pop round for a cup of tea so we could chat about it. I'm not a 'my dog is perfect' type. If the dog is being a nuisance I want to know details so I can stop it. She continued to shout, saying she didn't 'want to fucking talk'. She then stormed off, so I'm none the wiser.

I went home at this point as I was quite shaken and a bit teary. As I rounded the corner into my street, I saw this lady entering a house 7 doors down from my own on my terrace. I checked again with my NDN, who again insisted that she barely heard my dog these days.

I reported the verbal abuse to the police, asking that they didn't make contact but keep it on record in case it escalates. I now don't know what to do. I absolutely do not want to be 'that neighbour'.

My dog, as I said, is out of the house on weekdays. On evenings, she probably barks once or twice at our window when she sees a cat or another dog. This goes on for about 10-15 seconds typically. You can hear this if you are standing directly outside out house but not if inside a car or another house (again, neighbour confirms this). On weekends, this us probably around 5 or 6 times a day.

When she barks in the garden she is brought back inside. This happens 2-3 times a week, I'd say. The average time from first bark to being back inside the house is usually one minute.

I guess my question is whether or not this is excessive. I feel dreadful. I'm sure that when she barks in the garden she's very audible. I'm not sure if it would be possible to hear her from inside 7 houses away, when she barks inside our own house - I'm leaninb towards not given that our neighbour with the shared wall insists that she never hears her.

I just don't know what to do and I'm devastated that I was verbally abused in the street. I think I'm doing everything right, as per our trainer. But I'm petrified this will escalate.

Oh gosh who does she think she is, she sounds like she's very unstable tbh , a dog barks it's their natural thing to do..there is no way she would hear your dog barking 7 doors down through her walls...I would have got the police to of spoken to her...if your ever about again just record her on your phone and show the police..

I used to live somewhere where someone's dog would, without fail, bark and howl for about five minutes at 1am. I had no idea who they were, but could tell they were a few streets away. I wfh at that stage and didn't hear the dog at any other time, but regular as clockwork, 1am, a full five minutes of dog noise. It's definitely plausible to me that your neighbour from a few doors down can hear your dog.

Very strange that the dog only did it at that time! Perhaps something triggered it. Very annoying for you! I'd have a very hard time with that.

Do you happen to know if the dog in question was outside or inside? Because I certainly accept that a barking dog outside can be heard for miles around! We have a dog a few streets away that is locked out in the garden and barks and its very audible. Repeated RSPCA calls have achieved nothing!

She’s being a dick , sounds like she would spontaneously combust on our estate - they all set each other off barking

I had to assume they worked/kept odd hours and let the dog out to toilet at that stage, or were coming home from a night shift. Possibly it was inside, but with a window open. And my window was also open. I understand you say your dog is inside when the complaints have come in, but I do still think it's possible a neighbour a few doors away can hear it.

I’d disregard anything said by someone swearing at me.

Dogs barking are annoying and owners are often not honest with themselves how much their dog barks. Asking neighbours? They’ll most likely be polite as they don’t want drama.

Believe me guys, I am extremely honest with myself. I take this extremely seriously.

@watermel I actually have no idea when the complaints are regarding as the lady in question refused to give details when asked. Could be when the dog is in the garden, could be when the dog is inside, could be when the dog is out of the house at daycare. The woman refused to give timings or specifics.

I see the point around neighbours, but our next door neighbour is a decent sort but also very forthright. She has spoken to another neighbour regarding late night parties before. I'd be very surprised if she wasn't truthful, particularly given I've really impressed upon her how much I'd welcome feedback.

Intermittent is worse than continuous?

Surely continuous barking does stop and start at sometime?

OP ignore, the dog is fine!

That neighbour sounds mentally unwell to say the least. Her behaviour is not normal whereas your dog’s behaviour is normal. What you’ve stated is not excessive barking and there is no way your dog is disturbing that woman’s peace.
If that woman had spoken to me like that in the street she would have had short shrift from me not an invitation to talk reasonably over a cuppa. I applaud you OP for your reasonableness but that woman is a bully.
Do not let her impact your life.

Whilst I've never shouted at anyone, I do think it IS excessive, and it would really irritate me. So I can empathise with the neighbour.

Honestly OP you sound like a dream dog owner/neighbour to me! Your dog isn't barking excessively and I genuinely don't see how the odd few seconds through the day/evening is annoying to anyone, it only really gets annoying when it's prolonged imo.

My NDN has 3 large, German shepherd type dogs with deafeningly loud barks who she turfs out into the garden at all hours to make everyone else's life a misery because she can't stand them barking in the house! She keeps very strange hours and we're often kept awake literally all night as they can still be out there barking and howling at 4am.

We have of course reported to all relevant authorities, council, RSPCA etc but nothing is ever done. You sound so lovely and considerate by comparison and the woman sounds unstable and aggressive and has previous with other neighbours, which tells me this is not you, it's 100% her.

What a nightmare for you and, presumably, the poor dogs too.

Just ignore her. You have asked your closest neighbours and they say his fine. Sounds like she has mental health issues. I'd just cross the road when I walk past hers and ignore her.

I think you are worrying too much OP. Dogs bark sometimes, just like babies cry and children shout and scream when they are playing in the garden. So long as the noise isn't continuous I think it's unreasonable for anyone to complain
Your neighbour sounds unhinged - if she lived in our road she'd quickly find something more legitimate to complain about. We live on a road that's a major walking thoroughfare for dog walkers all day everyday from sunrise to sunset and it's not unusual for them to stop and chat to friends and acquaintances they meet along the way. Inevitably their dogs bark. It's not continuous barking obviously but it occurs often enough and not all dogs stop when they're told to.
The only thing that really annoys me is that all the houses have front gardens open to the path and some dog owners think nothing of letting their dogs play wee and poo on them while they're chatting. If I see them on my garden I'm certainly not averse to banging on the window!

Yes, 100% agree. Disgusting behaviour from those owners!

Listen I can’t be arsed hearing neighbours dogs but I wouldn’t have an issue with yours and your doggos barking schedule (I might draw the line at the morning one though, I get woken up at 8am every morning by a neighbours barking dog outside - I don’t know what a long lie is anymore 😂)

Honestly though it’s not unsocial hours, it’s not constant, it’s not during the night. I don’t see the issue. You sound like a good owner, you’ve put training in. I wish my NDN would do the same, but she prefers to leaving it crying all night when she stays at her bfs 😖

They were pissed off by it when it was a puppy year ago when the from came through the door
and they seem unable to move on from that

Yes, you may well be right actually.

If your woof diary is accurate, I don't think that's excessive. That's not a lot of woofs in total. The kind of barking that annoys me is when it's a singular woof every few seconds or so and it goes on for ages, so you're just waiting for the next one. There's lots of time between your episodes and none go on for long.

I'd just keep doing what you're doing and avoid.

We were reported to the council for our dog barking and it was mistaken identity. One of the adjoining neighbours leave their dog outside all day and it’s quite reactive so barks a lot, and whoever reported it thought it was our dog. So, mistakes do happen. The difference though is our accuser has never revealed their identity! We asked around and nobody knew.
Your neighbour sounds quite unhinged to scream at you in the street. I would ignore it I think. The council wouldn’t take a complaint seriously from that far down the street.

Absolutely no excuse for anyone shrieking at you like that. A horrible experience, no wonder you're feeling shaken.
I di know what it is like to live near barking dogs. What yo the owner may seem fairly trivial may feel awful to a neighbour.
My neighbours takr their very loudly barking dog out early every dsy. They go to work esrly.
The time it barks varys by season. In the summer, well before 5 o'clock. It only barks for a few minutes, but, too late, I'm awake. It barks again when they return home after the walk. No chance of any more sleep. DH sleeps through it.
So the experience of dogs barking is a personal one.
During the day it barks, when I have a migraine it's torture.Pure agony. And no, earplugs don't help.
But it's a dog. They bark.
I suffer. But I do it in silence. I wouldn't dream of accosting my meighbour!

Yes, I must admit I did have a little cry into the dog's fur when I got home!

I understand how frustrating it can be. I used to live in a flat with a dog above and was woken at 4am every day by the little woofer jumping down from the bed, seemingly wearing concrete boots, and screeching for half an hour. And I do not do well on little sleep. Partly why I'm so determined to make sure to be a good neighbour.

Sorry OP but the neighbour who shouted at you sounds nuts and confused!

I once had a neighbour when I lived in a city rushing up to me and aggressively telling me to move my van as I had blocked her in. She was quite outraged and not polite about it. I politely told her I didn't own a van and pointed to where my car was sitting. I said however there is someone at number x who has a van so maybe it is hers. Neighbour (who I didn't really know as it was a big street with flats) stomped off and didn't even apologise for having a go at completely the wrong person.

I own a dog now and live in a new build estate. I'm home pretty much all the time with my dog and he is only left on a very rare occassion (I'm retired). He does bark though sometimes. Especially if a cat comes into our garden. A few times he has gone out in the middle of the night needing a pee and has found a cat there and has gone mental barking. Of course the cat runs and I immediately shush the dog but not before he has gotten out a few barks. Nobody has ever complained. (a teenager in a house one up shouted shut up one night when his window was open. It was actually just after 11 so not that late and I don't even know if he was shouting at my dog or at something else but given that I have to listen to his music and my dog barked like two seconds before I shushed him immediately he can get to f*ck)

During the day he barks at birds in the garden and if another dog barks in the street he will bark back. He also barks at people outside the house or at the door. We live in a detached house so nobody through the wall but people will definately hear him in the garden. I don't let him bark for more than than the time it takes me to go out and shush him but that on occassion can be a minute if I am stuck somewhere (like the loo!)

I mean if something is excessive then of course people will get pissed off but your dog sounds well trained. Every dogs barks occassionally surely. I have to put up with peoples kids, visitors, outside DIY, balls being kicked, noisy barbecues. Does it get on my nerves sometimes. Sure! In the interest of getting along though I wouldn't dream of saying something unless they were really taking the piss. Most noise is just people living their lives and on a new build estate I think expecting silence is unrealistic. Same for where you live.

You're fine. Ignore the crazy lady. Unless you live in the middle of nowhere you cannot get away from noise.

p.s. I could complain about the cat that comes into our garden that causes my dog to bark but I don't because what can the neighbour do about it. Cat lives two doors up I think. I also don't like the fact it shites in my garden but again it wouldn't be worth falling out with a neighbour about.

I am very amused at the idea of some scrappy little dog wearing concrete boots!!