How long before getting another dog?

[SadAndConfusedDogLover]

My beloved dog died in an accident earlier this year. It was a complete shock. He was in good health and in the prime of life- slowing down a bit at 12 but we had been looking forward to him having a long happy old age so to lose him suddenly was a horrible shock compounded by the fact that it happened with our dog sitter so I wasn’t even there. It has taken a while to sink in and still sort of feels unreal.

I’d always thought I’d want a big gap before getting another dog and that I’d want to get a different breed to avoid comparisons (he was really the best dog in the world). But I’ve found myself longing for a pup and to get one just like my old dog. I can’t work out whether this is a good idea or just part of the process of grieving or the fact I haven’t really accepted he’s gone.

I wondered if anyone else had been through this. Should I wait?

There is no right time, its hard becuse all you really want is your dog back but a new dog won't be them.

I waited 6 months after loosing our first to old age/cancer and had the most amazing dog
When we lost him suddenly at 18months I rushed into getting another as I couldn't cope and brought a similar type eg hearding breed but as far away from looks as I could get from my last two who were very similar.
My boys were always around 50kg cuddle bugs.
They were My dogs not family dogs, did anything I asked and were just the best boys.
I now have a tiny 11.2kg 2year old girl she has the attitude my boys had but she's not them and it hurts
Shes an amazing family dog and I love her t9 bits but I don't have the same bond with her

Hi, I’m so very sorry for your loss.
We lost ours 3 years ago and it took 2 years for us to consider another pup. I felt I couldn’t have a black Labrador again as I didn’t want to ‘replace’ Harry. We got a fox red Labrador one year ago and he’s such a joy. I’m glad we waited. We needed to grieve Harry and accept he wasn’t coming back.

I'd wait a bit, say a year or so. You need to grieve from what sound like very sad circumstances. You will want the new dog to be just like your beloved pet and they won't. I replaced DDog too soon years ago and I did love new dog very much in the end, but it took a while. Could you foster or walk dogs from a local rescue centre in the meantime? You might meet your new dog. Sympathy from me though, it's an awful time.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a dog is one of the hardest things. But there is really no right or wrong time to get a new dog.
I lost my old girl at 16,5 years. One of my ways of preparing for that loss was to carefully consider what breed of dog I would like next.
So, when my girl died I had already done my research and knew which breeders to contact. Four weeks to the day I went and picked up a mad puppy.
I will not lie. It was a very tough 12 months. I was grieving and having to deal with a crazy terrier puppy. But for me at the time, it was absolutely the right decision.
I feel that any day I don't have a dog is a wasted day 😊

I waited a month (and my dog was PTS in very traumatic circumstances) - I did however get an entirely different breed so I wouldn’t unfairly compare the two

But I think it’s an entirely individual process that no one should advise anyone else on tbh. No one except you knows what’s best for you. Only you can know if you’re ready

Edits because I can’t spell or even write in sentences this morning!

I don’t think there’s any right answer. But, it sounds to me like you’re still in the “I want him back” phase. Which is fine and understandable, but you can’t. You can get a puppy, which will be its own dog, may be very different to your old dog, and given its 12 years since you last had a puppy, will probably be a lot harder than you’re remembering!

So my answer is: whenever you can truthfully tell yourself you’re excited about a new dog, not a replacement dog.

The day before I had my first dog PTS I looked at puppies. Got one ten weeks later through the recommendation of a friend. That dog was nearly sixteen when he had to be PTS quite suddenly, and I was eight months on the waiting list. There is no right or wrong time to wait, rather like remarriage after widowing.

We lost our first dog suddenly when he was 11. I couldn't settle to anything till we'd decided we wanted to get another - and our 7yo daughter quietly but desperately wanted one too. We started looking - thinking we'd get a pup same breed but a different colour and that we'd obviously have to wait months. But DH (who was doing all the research, contacting breeders ) found a 10 month old who hadn't made the grade for show/stud so needed a 'pet home' ... turned out he looked very like our first but he had a completely different character.

When he died at over 16 a couple of years it broke me... I felt done. We are at a different stage of life too - DD grown up, DH and I on the verge of retirement with lots of travel plans. I can't see us getting another - the end of our dog's life was physically taxing as he couldn't manage stairs, it was ok at 61 but if we had another who lived as long we'd be late 70s.

So... there's no right or wrong answer. Do what feels right for you. Even if you get the same breed it won't be 'just like your old dog', I'm sure you know that.

Thanks so much everyone. I am feeling so heartbroken about it all, I miss him so much. It's good to hear about other people's experiences, I am really grateful for your posts.

@LoveIsleOfWight Just saying - fab username!

OP, I'm still not 'over' my dog who died four and a half years ago. I think that I'll look for another one, but my heart sinks every time.

You'll know when you're ready and you'll have lots of love to give to that puppo. Probably, that puppo will find you.

I got a dog a couple of months after my previous dog died , honestly I was so heartbroken that I thought if I left it I would never get another as it was so upsetting to lose him. It takes time to bond with a new dog, whenever you get them. A pup is nothing like an older dog in terms of your relationship it’s each other. I loved my new pup but it took a while to feel as bonded to him, and that was also true for my current dog.
I always get the same breed of dog, but they are individuals and not replacements.

So sorry for your loss, it's totally understandable you're still grieving and in shock.

I'd get another, though. I have a heart and a home full of love for a dog. But only you know if you're ready.

So very sorry about your boy. Sudden losses are the hardest to bear; we lost our dog at just 7 years old due to a vaccine reaction. The grief (and guilt) was immense because we couldn't be with him at the end (in our case due to covid lockdown) so I really do empathise with you. It does take a long time for it to properly sink in when their death is so unexpected.

There really is no right time to get another dog - if you feel ready for a pup now then start planning for one. It took us almost 3 years to seriously look for a puppy because although I felt ready, my husband didn't. In the end I just took the initiative and contacted a few of our old connections. We went with the same breed but the opposite sex as we felt that way there would be enough similarities but we wouldn't make so many direct comparisons.

Our girl is now 4 months old and although we still miss our big chap we already love her very much and our house feels like home again. We were lucky though, we bonded with our puppy straight away but I know from past experience (and can see from previous posts here) that isn't always the case and it can sometimes take a long while. There is no way to know how things will work out with your new addition but you have to go with your heart and it sounds as if you already know you're ready to commit. Good luck with your search.

I worried about this. In the end we found a puppy within a few weeks. It was the best thing for us.

I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️🐾

I am so sorry for your loss. The sudden loss of a beloved pet is just such a painful thing to go through. When we lost our Cocker Spaniel very suddenly at age 7 I honestly thought I could never go through that again. Within a few months I realised that while we could never replace him, there was a dog shaped hole in our lives that we could fill. We got a puppy just 4 months after our boy died. Same breed but different colours and he is such a different boy. The puppy days were quite hard as he was a challenging pup but he has grown up into the loveliest dog with the most beautiful and chilled nature. It worked for us.

As most people have said there isn’t a right time. There will be a right time for you. It sounds to me if you are perhaps where we found ourselves, not just missing your dog, but missing all that a dog brings into your life. I hope that you find that right moment, and wish you every happiness with your future dog when that time comes. There will be a lucky dog out there, just waiting for that to happen.

i waited 4 months and really wish I had waited longer. I missed having a dog sooooo much but our new dog is so much harder work than our last so we spend the whole time saying ‘Dog 1 wouldn’t have done that’. I realise now we were not ready.

However im totally committed to our new dog and I know with time it will be ok.

But I would never do it so soon again, I would wait a lot longer.

Saying that this might be our last.