I don’t think I’ll ever get over losing my darling little dog

[Theyearwas1973]

People respond with ‘really??’ when I say this but I am still very much mourning the loss of my lovely 10 year old Norfolk Terrier who had to leave his place from my side 2 years ago.

He was my shadow, my bestest mate. He was the most gentle dog and everyone loved him. He helped me get through a very dark time with depression (which has since returned). We would go for long hikes in the countryside and meet other dogs and their owners and have snuggles on the sofa. When my daughter was little every Christmas she would make him a special tinsel collar which he’d proudly wear all day long and he would relish his own Xmas dinner. Every Monday my lovely (and since departed) mil would make him his own plate of roast dinner when we visited. Everyone loved him.

We have since got another dog, a rescue and although I love him dearly he’s been a lot of hard work but we are slowly getting there with him and he’s a lovely companion but I’ll never get over losing my Archie, I just feel it. People say ‘It’s just a dog’ even some of those with dogs tell me that but not to me, Arch was a one in a million.

I’m currently laid up feeling sorry for myself with Covid and silently weeping (not helping the spongy eyes and blocked nose 🙄) because he would have and should still be snuggled besides me, as he no doubt would have done but that wretched cancer took him. I was hoping he’d live to be an old boy with bandy legs and a pure white beard but it wasn’t to be but 10 years wasn’t enough, we had plans me and him - more holidays, more dips in the sea and cheeky little slivers of dinner given to him under the table whilst he waited patiently.

I know there’s nothing I can do about it but his absence really has left a hole in my soul.

Ahhh op. People who respond like that (dog or no dog) really don’t get it do they. I don’t think every dog parent has the same connection with their furry friends. I haven’t lost mine yet (7 y/o and hopefully will keep on going strong for another 70!! 😂 😞) he is my best friend, a truly special soul and I know when he goes I will be feeling the same way as you. Sending you hugs x

Thank you, they are such lovely companions it’s so hard not to feel it when they go.

I hope you get many lovely years with your ddog 😍

I think you need to look at getting some counseling or something as while it's natural to grieve for a dog, to be feeling such strong constant grief after 2 years i think it's time to get some help to move past it.

No number of years is enough with a special pet. My sweet girl left 2 years ago aged 16. Forever in my heart. When she left I understood the real physical meaning of 'heartbroken'. I'm sorry you lost your lovely boy and are feeling low. Have you made a nice album of all your favourite pictures? Thank you for rescuing another dog. Hope you feel better soon x

I‘ve had counselling but it’s not helped.

I don’t cry every day, I’m feeling particularly low due to having Covid but the truth is that I do still sorely miss him.

Thank you and I’m sorry for your loss too x 16 years is a long time to develop a lovely bond but too short a time to lose them isn’t it but nothing we can do.

I have a lovely album which we had made up and it sits next to his little box of ashes (which we will bury in the garden of the home we will eventually move into when we retire).

Archie sounds like he was an amazing dog OP.

Our 15 year old Springer had to be pts 3 years ago and I could honestly still cry about him now.

We want another dog but we've all agreed that no other dog could be as good as he was, so I don't know if we ever will.

The kids ask almost every day when they can have another so I'm torn about it.

I’m sorry for your loss, I love springers, so full of zest.

My kids, especially my dd was constantly badgering me to get another. It’s a good idea to give it a long time, I was rather hasty getting our rescue as the house felt so empty and walking out on my own felt weird but I realised it was a rash decision but he’s here now and we love him and will give him a great life (far, far better than where he came from).

He sounds like a wonderful dog, OP.

We only lost our beautiful JRT last week but I know I'll always miss her. She was my absolute best friend and just the sweetest little baby ever. She also got me through a really dark time and I'm so grateful for that. The intensity of grief will lessen over time but there'll always be a place in my heart reserved for her. She was just so special.

We will get another dog one day but that dog will never take her place. I'll just make more space to love them as well.

I understand OP, lost my heart dog 14 months ago the first 8 months were the hardest of my life like @dontblameme says I truly know the physicality of heartbroken, most days now I can look at pictures and think about her with joy that I had her for nearly 15 years and then other days it’s like a sucker punch that I will never see her again, wish I had the answer, I guess we just have to live with the grief and over the years hope it will ease.

I‘m so very sorry for your loss, it must feel so raw still.

You are right, the pain does ease but they give us so much joy it is darn hard not to miss them terribly but we can live happily with the knowledge we gave them a good life, they are the lucky ones to come and share their lives with good people.

JUST A DOG
From time to time, people tell me, “lighten up, it’s just a dog,”
or “that’s a lot of money for just a dog.”
They don’t understand the distance travelled, the time spent,
or the costs involved for “just a dog.”
Some of my proudest moments have come about with “just a dog.”
Many hours have passed and my only company was “just a dog,”
but I did not once feel slighted.
Some of my saddest moments have been brought about by
“just a dog,” and in those days of darkness, the gentle touch
of “just a dog” gave me comfort and reason to overcome the day.
If you, too, think it’s “just a dog,” then you probably understand
phrases like “just a friend,” “just a sunrise,” or “just a promise.”
“Just a dog” brings into my life the very essence of friendship,
trust, and pure unbridled joy.
“Just a dog” brings out the compassion and patience
that make me a better person.
Because of “just a dog” I will rise early, take long walks and look
longingly to the future.
So for me and folks like me, it’s not “just a dog”
but an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future,
the fond memories of the past, and the pure joy of the moment.
“Just a dog” brings out what’s good in me and diverts my thoughts
away from myself and the worries of the day.
I hope that someday they can understand that its’ not “just a dog”
but the thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being
“just a man” or “just a woman.”
So the next time you hear the phrase “just a dog,”
just smile, because they “just don’t understand.”
~Unknown Author~

I am truly sorry for your loss. It is a genuine pain to loss them.

I feel the same as you, the first months were brutal, I cried every day but the pain eases and I can look at his photos and smile but days like today I feel that pain like it was only yesterday.

That made me bawl but thank you it’s so very lovely (and true).

I still tear up when I think about DDog no 4 who we lost just over 8 years ago. DDogs no 5 and 6 bring me much joy but I still grieve for those that went before them.

I'm so sorry I can't add anything to the thread as the lovely posters on here have said so much, but I do wish you well, and hope you start to feel better soon. Archie wouldn't want you to be sad. 😢 He loved you and would want you to be smiling and happy.

Take care lovely. 💞

sending you love, I am going to miss my cat forever - I have had many animals, but that one was my soul mate. You can't explain to someone who has not known that connection. Some of us understand though xx

I'm so sorry @Theyearwas1973 and I hear you. I lost my heart dog 18 months ago and I still have a paw shaped hole in my life. He was a once in a lifetime dog, so special, so precious and so loved.

Sorry for your loss I lost my 18 year old cat 🐈‍⬛ a year ago and it still hurts like hell,

Oh bless you OP. I adored my last dog too, and miss him every day. What a lucky dog to have had you.

I have another dog now. It’s not the same but she’s a little heart thief too. I say this gently but you have another dog in front of you, they live such short lives, their only fault, and the love for your boy has to go somewhere. Don’t miss the opportunity to put the love into what is right in front of you.

your dog was lucky to have you

I lost my cat aged 20+ just over 2 years ago. We were all devastated. After a few weeks, I couldn't bear the emptiness where there used to be my adored cat, so I adopted two rescues. They don't replace him but they have their own little personalities and I love them dearly. They're a brilliant distraction. And I've since added a third.

I still feel tearful sometimes thinking about cats I had in my childhood, and the ones I had who were my babies when I couldn't have the human variety 20-30 years ago. They all have their place in your heart.

You need to appreciate the boy (?) you have now though because all-too-soon he will be old too....

I will never get over losing my girl. I have another girl I absolutely adore. But never ever will I get past her loss (and I'm okay with that. Sometimes you get on with it, you don't get over it).

I know just how you feel so I’m sending you hugs, I know it’s the worst pain in the world. I could have written your post myself, today is the tenth anniversary of me picking up the ashes of my one in a million soul dog. He was my best friend, a gentle, funny, affectionate, loving boy, he was only ten too when we lost him. He was a clown, a big happy, clumsy buffoon and everyone loved him. I’ve never really got over losing him.

I have his nephew now (a few generations along) and I adore him, he’s a challenging dog, he has a couple of behaviour issues that we’re working on and I do sometimes wish he was an easy dog like my old boy. He’s laid on the bed snuggled next to me now and I know he worships me so I hate myself for feeling differently about him but I do love him dearly, just in a different way to my old boy. I tell myself that’s ok though.

And it’s ok to grieve, I still cry when I think about my old boy. But I look at his photos and I remember the happy times, those memories will never leave me. I’m sure you do the same, so cry and remember the happiness that you gave each other and also remember, they never really leave us, they’re always in our hearts.

I was sent this poem by a good friend just after he died, one who knew how much he meant to me. It still resonates with me.

So this is where we part my friend,
and you'll run on around the bend.
Gone from sight, but not from mind,
new pleasures there you'll surely find.

I will go on, I'll find the strength,
life measures quality, not its length.
One long embrace before you leave,
share one last look, before I grieve.

There are others, that much is true,
but they be they, and they aren't you.
And I, fair, impartial, or so I thought,
will remember well all that you've taught.

Your place I'll hold, you will be missed,
the fur I stroked, the nose I kissed.
And as you journey to your final rest,
take with you this... I loved you best.

So sorry to hear this OP. My own dog (who is my first ever pet) is 10 now, 11 later in the year and I live in fear of him going. He's a small mixed breed and I live in hope he will have a good life and stay with me for a good few years yet.

It does worry me though and I have begun to think about what I will do when he goes. Probably my mind trying to protect me by preparing for it. Since I got him we have been on so many adventures together - new jobs, new houses, end of relationships, deaths of family members and all through it is my wee constant companion.

He's a bossy, stubborn, opinionated, small dog who is definately not a lap dog although he does come and sit beside me and sleep on the bed with me. He's knows all our routines and I do dread having to teach a new dog what everything means. We are a little family together him and I and my house is as much his as mine. He has dog beds, bowls, toys, interactive games, chewed up treats all over the place. He even has his own indoor dog house with roof terrace and stairs to look out of the window. When he goes I will be sitting here with all his stuff round me and the silence will be deafening.

I sort of regret now getting his name put on lots of his things - his bed, his blankets, his toybox. It seemed cute at the time but it will make it even harder when he has to go.

My neighbour who had a small dog lost him suddenly at 7 and I was really upset and shocked when she told me. I mean like really upset and it wasn't even my dog.

The price we pay for their unconditional love and constant companionship is that we have to suffer the loss of them. I don't know if there is an after life or not but if there is then I think we will meet up with all our loves ones and that includes animals. So if it helps then think that when you pass you will be reunited with him.

There are no easy answers. I know it will utterly stab me in the heart when I have to open my front door and he is not there inside waiting for me. I try not to let it spoil the time we have left but it does play on my mind.

Dogs are furry angels sent to help us on our difficult and often lonely journey called life. xx