Old dog support thread

[Happysallie]

A general thread for discussing the trials and tribulations of owning an elderly dog.

My dog is 14. She’s been a great pet. I would never rehome her or PTS unless clearly it was the end. I am committed to care for her.

But it is getting so so so frustrating and a huge extra responsibility / stress.

Getting someone willing to care for her so we can go away as doddery. Convincing her to eat enough. The pace of walks. The refusal to walk on certain surfaces as it’s difficult. The sniffing for five minutes at a time. The sudden refusal to walk on the lead ‘because’. The medications and vet visits. The limitations on weekend activities and holidays. The constant worry. She has a tremor and I get multiple comments a day from kind but incredibly annoying strangers.

I love her but my god is it a lot of hard work.

Strategies to alleviate the frustration welcome.

The only strategy we use is to keep reminding ourselves how lucky we are to still have him as at New Year 2023 it looked likely that he would be gone within weeks . Our main issue is he gets me up every night between 1:30 / 2:30 to go down and let him out for a wander and a wee , then we have a conversation at the bottom of the stairs to see whether he is coming back to bed or staying downstairs . At least he’s fully continent 😄

I have an old girl. She’s 12, we don’t take her out on walks unless we take her in the car and walk round a playing field, so when she’s had enough we just get her in the car. She eats well, but she’s a bit deaf and a bit blind, her quality if life isn’t what it was but she’s doing fine. We have a holiday next week, she always comes with us but this time we will spend most of the time in the holiday cottage because she just can’t walk that far any more. I worry constantly about her knowing that the end isn’t far away. This is the part of having a dog that I dislike the most, I can’t imagine life without her. OP I feel your pain.

love for your pet will get you through ❤️, come on here n talk as often as you want , lots of people in exactly same situation ..
have you got a kind dog sitter for when you go away?

@GenerousGardener ours won’t walk on the pavement anymore so we go to our local heath or to a NT place in the car , he’s also gone deaf in the last few months and has a cataract but not bad enough to warrant having it done .

My elder lab is eager enough for her walks but has slowed down and can't really manage far on the second walk. She used to swim every day but although she enters the water, no longer goes out of her depth.
She is incontinent most nights now. DH finds this the most difficult bit.
She has got skinny but still enjoys her food (I've got her on elderly dog food) and daily egg, oils, etc. She still has a shiny coat.
The vet says carry on as we are until she shows signs of pain or distress. She has a tumour, which he thinks has metastasised into her brain, as she is slightly more vacant nowadays.
She wins the prize for the most demanding puppy we have ever had, has always been a right little madam. I don't know what we will do without her.

We were in this situation for two years - almost exactly to the letter of what @GenerousGardener describes. Nothing detracts or diminishes the deep love you have for your darling dog but it's so sad and awful when so much of the joy turns to worry.

We stopped leaving our dear girl alone for the last two years after she had a couple of seizures and we couldn't bear the thought of her being alone and that happening.

Good dog owners agonize over the puppy years and whether a young dog is right for them but really, not enough is discussed about the later years and the restrictions, obligation, worry and sadness that come with that and have no happy ending.

My tips for what it's worth - try to get out on your own regularly and do something you want. DH would stay with DDog and I would go out and visa versa. Keep exercising! Slowing down with my darling dog after a decade of long hill walks meant I put on a lot of weight.

Also, try to enjoy the quiet gentle moments with your dog because they're as precious as all the other times. Our dear girl died last year and I'd give anything to have her back, but I'd want her back when she was 3 and I'd want her to always be 3 - for her sake and ours.

You're not alone OP.

My lurcher girl is 13ish (had her from rescue aged 3) and is deffo slowing down now although she still loves an occasional zoomy. She's doing OK health wise, but I know that can't last. We've decided no holidays until she's gone. I'd worry too much and just don't want to leave her as she's definitely become more clingy now. It's not a sacrifice, I love her.

It's not a sacrifice, I love her.

I know this feeling so well. You'd go to the ends of the earth for them wouldn't you.

my dog is 14. Now completely deaf so we tend to keep him on the lead because although his recall was amazing - he cant hear! He is also very into sniffing.

our dog has learnt a sort of sign language. A tap of my thigh means get up & follow me. Arms out means come to me. Tap my torso means cuddles.

he still walks twice a day and enjoys his food.

feeling grateful but know he wont be here for ever. he's a dream dog, even in his old years.

The last two years of my beloved dog’s life were like lockdown. Walks were short (max 1 km) because he couldn’t manage more. No trips away because he was doubly incontinent. Always on a lead because he was deaf and half blind. Multiple visits to the vet’s. BUT, he had a good, gentle old age until it was time for him to go (more angst: is it time? Isn’t it?j. His incapacity had a dreadful effect on my own physical and mental health because the idea of going for longer, more strenuous walks without him was an anathema, but I’ve recovered both with my new dog. Be led by your dog’s needs, don’t dither when it’s time to PTS, and have it done at home.
No strategies to alleviate the frustration: it is what it is. But bear in mind that your needs are as important as your dog’s. It might even be kinder for everyone to PTS sooner (before serious decline and loss of bond) rather than later.

Luckily our 14 to is still the same as ever... In fact healthier than her 10yo dd... Cancer it seems. Not looking forward to old doddery...

I’m glad I’ve found this thread. Not sure what to do. My beautiful girl ( 12.5 year old cocker spaniel) has started with a few behaviours that are making me feel it’s “time”…..

restless at night
having accidents in the house ( never had an issue with this previously, even as a puppy) her poor little face looks like she’s mortified
lethargic/ sleeping most of the day
back legs have buckled but only a couple of times
she’s refused her food this pm but still drinking water

we had a Labrador growing up and in her last few years had her on all kinds of medications and it felt like we kept her alive for us, not for her.

feel really conflicted. I feel like when I look at her eyes she’s pleading with me 🥺

When I looked at our ddog 1 and felt guilty she was still here I made the appointment... No regents..

How old was she?

11.. Life span 10 - 12. She had a brain tumour.. Assumed not diagnosed... She was suffering..
She was well loved and I let her go and be free of pain.

Lovely dog. Was she a Rottie x?

Yes. Had a fab pedigree and whole family details on her papers.... Have got her ashes and dd had a pendant made with some. Still can't look at pics and it's been ages!

I can highly recommend a dog buggy for older pets. I have an innopet stroller and it makes a huge difference, we still get out for walks but the dog rides in style and gets out for a sniff at the interesting bits.

We recently came across a charity for old dogs called Sonny Days Charity. I think they help with senior aids and things like that, so, not medical stuff.. worth speaking to them perhaps for some advice?

After losing my almost 12 year old Border Collie early last year due to chronic ill health and dementia, I decided to rescue another old dog this past autumn.
Toby is approximately 15 to 16 years old and had been in a shelter for 10 years. At the time l adopted him l hadn't realised he was quite as old as is but knew he was elderly.
He potters on his walks, sniffing all the time and goes just where he wants. He loves to eat and sleep.
Toby has brought such joy into my life, he has such a gentle soul and loves everyone.
He is one in a million.
He does have medical issues, to be expected but excepts everything with such a stoic attitude that makes me realise that l am lucky to have him.

Well done for adopting dear old Toby. I will definitely have an old dog when my girl goes. They are so loving.

We have two 13 yr old terriers at the moment and a puppy.
The terriers go for a slow gentle sniff walk in the fields. We chat as we go, we are out over an hour but don’t cover much ground. It’s what they enjoy. Sometimes we walk to the river and sit and watch.
Our beautiful pup goes on 2 long walks a day and that baby can walk. She is not one yet but has had amazing recall since she was very young so she’s off lead and exploring everything. Just loving her life. Listens to every word I tell her. Fills me with pure joy watching her. (Frenchie)
We lost our oldest 2 terriers a few years ago aged 19 and 20.
They were up to toilet several times each in the night, no walks for the last year of their lives. He was deaf, and later went blind, I made the decision to set him free. I’d left it too long even then. And then I looked at the life my girl was enduring at 19 and I gave her the same peaceful end.
We had a dog buggy for the very oldest, put a sheepskin rug in there and they loved it.
It was a hard time, the cleaning accidents, lack of sleep. The worry. Loved them so much. I’ll do it all again but I will not let them go on as long this time, if I think it’s time I’ll help them, I think that’s one thing I have learned going through the end months with our oldest dogs.

I know this is an old thread but I’m getting here with my 16 year old JRT.

The past few weeks her food intake has decreased and she’s sleeping a lot more. Still asks to go for a walk now and again but the mind is willing and the body is not.

The occasional wee accident whilst sleeping, it’s so hard to know when it’s time. She eats very little now and everything has to be coaxed. She is prone to pancreatitis so all the nice tasty fatty foods to tempt her are off the menu.

It’s all a bit heartbreaking and definitely the worst part of this beautiful journey with my girl.

Innopet dog buggies are ace! got one for sale atm in case anyone is interested 😊

Sorry to hear that @Naggydogbutt .

I have two, one age 15, the other 14. The 14 year old westie is flying it and nobody believes her age. However she has a tumour that is either (hopefully) slow growing and not a problem or really aggressive. She's getting that out next week. It's been there a few months so is probably slow but we won't know until they do the biopsy.

The other girl is, I think, heading out. She had back surgery a year and a half ago and recovered well. While her back legs aren't as firm as they could be, she can run, walk etc and still enjoys walks. She's also deaf and has cataracts. Luckily where we walk her she can still go off lead as she hates the lead.

However, she has lost a lot of weight and it's hard work getting her up eat enough. Her kidneys are starting to deteorate too.

It's really hard seeing them go down hill and know that we don't have much longer.