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If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

My dog is fading in front of me

53 replies

AbjectFailure · 27/05/2024 09:07

I have a small terrier and I think she is dying.

She is 12 and has ways been very active, a beautiful, fun, gentle, excitable and mischievous member of our family.

She has largely been healthy but last year she had major surgery for a very vascular tumour in her neck. It was horrific and we said at the time that we would be reluctant to put her through the ordeal of surgery again. That said, in time she recovered and the vet was happy with the margins, no further treatment was required.

Two months ago she got what seemed to be a tummy bug. She Jackson Pollocked the kitchen with vomit and had a terrible runny bum.

We took her to the vets and they said, yes a tummy bug, lots of it around, gave her an injection and some tablets and sent us on our way.

Since then we have been back 5 times.

One thing about her is that if she has ever been caught short or unwell, she has always been very civilised and taken it to the kitchen, which makes clean ups very easy (previously infrequent). Nothing to do with training. We think she trained us, just a great dog and quite fastidious. This is no longer the case and it's clear she has no warning any more.

She no longer eats having been a typical terrier and scrounger all her life and famously once stealing the Christmas turkey... a real character that we always forgave for every bit of mischief.

Now if we are lucky we might be able to coax her to accept a blob of paste with a tablet hidden in it or a very tiny morsel of chicken.

She now has urinary incontinence, and is confused and exhausted.

She doesn't vomit or have diarrhoea any more, and in fact that was a fairly short lived situation at the beginning.

She has lost a third of her body weight, and she wasn't tubby to start with. Each time we go back, the vet brightly announces a further drop in weight.

She tremors constantly. She us lying next to me right now, just shaking.

Last night she peed in our bed which is something that has never happened before. We think it happened in her sleep, and the poor thing absented herself from the bed after it happened. So the dementia she apparently has is not so bad that she wasn't concerned. (To be clear we don't punish for the pee. We never would. This is clearly beyond her control, completely uncharacteristic, and we have just ordered some nappies for overnight).

She has had blood tests, urinalysis, and most recently, at our insistence an ultrasound.

At one stage the vet said it was pancreatitis, but that was discounted with blood tests.

They also said she has arthritis and muscle wastage, (started Librella), has probably had some mini strokes, and has the onset of doggy dementia.

The scan showed thickening of the stomach wall, but not localised, the whole stomach is thickened. So they just said its some kind of unflammation. She is on pred, pardale, omeprazole.

She simply isnt recovering. None of the medication seems to have had any impact. I had thought the pred might perk her up but shes been on it 5 days now and nothing has changed.

If anything she is getting worse.

We are at our wits end.

She looks to us like she is dying in front of us, and the vets are very nice, but we seem to be no closer to knowing what is happening, and it almost feels like they are appeasing us....

But if she's not eating... she's going to die isn't she?

I'm not sure why I am here, whether it's for a hand hold or someone to give me an idea to chase down with the vets, because they seem very laissez faire.

I've just ordered some high calorie liquid which I've been squirting into her mouth with a syringe but if it's giving her 50 calories a day I'd be surprised.

This is no life for a dog and part of me has started to wonder if I need to broach the question of whether, if there is no answer or cure, we should consider putting her out of her misery.

We are all devastated at this thought, and we have kind of come to it over a series of concerned looks at each other, no one wanting to air it because it's so unspeakable, but everyone thinking it.

How can the poor darling be left to suffer like this. It's unspeakable.

All she does is lie next to me shaking.

Refuses to go for walks. We used to have to spell the word walk rather than say it out loud because she would lose her mind with excitement, now we have to pick her up and carry her out the door for her to stagger a few paces up the road and wee before pulling back towards home.

No poops have been forthcoming now for days. It's just so painful to watch her suffer. She is clearly sad, no interest in her toys.

I don't know what to do, and I'm worried we have been selfish in not seeking to release her sooner because we can't bear to lose her. It just seems so insane that there is no answer to her suffering.

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 27/05/2024 09:10

You need to ask about ending her misery. The vets seem to just want to keep taking your money.
Remember the saying, better a week too early than a day too late.

TokyoSushi · 27/05/2024 09:10

It's time to let her go OP Flowers

BoobyDazzler · 27/05/2024 09:12

You need to give her the final kindness and end her suffering :(

It’s completely heartbreaking, I’m sorry.

DarkForces · 27/05/2024 09:12

I'm so sorry op. I have a little terrier type and they steal your heart. It does sound like you know the answer as she sounds very ill. My parents kept a dog going too long and regretted not making the decision sooner, although the vet kept suggesting more and more treatments so it was tough. It really sounds like it's time but my heart goes out to you

ThatshallotBaby · 27/05/2024 09:13

I’m so so sorry. It’s such a terrible pain. Maybe talk to the vets again, and be prepared for what they might say. Sending you a big hug.

DarkForces · 27/05/2024 09:15

For my last dog, I got a vet to come to us to put him down so he never had that final trip and could pass with us. I don't know if that's something your vets offer but it was worth the extra for us.

DontBiteTheCat · 27/05/2024 09:17

It’s time OP. She’s suffering now.

I am so, so sorry, it’s heartbreaking but it’s the kindest thing you can do for her. Better a week too soon than a day too late x

tiredvendorbattybuyer · 27/05/2024 09:19

It is an awful decision to make, but if she was my pup I would be asking the vets to make her comfortable one last time and let her go.

🐾

maudelovesharold · 27/05/2024 09:19

I think you know what the best thing is for her, op. I’m so sorry, it’s natural to want to hang on to them for as long as possible, we’ve done it, and felt guilty afterwards that the suffering went on perhaps longer than it should have. She does sound to be in a miserable state, and of course you don’t want that for her. For her sake, it really seems like the time has come to be brave and do the kindest thing. Flowers

AbjectFailure · 27/05/2024 09:26

Thank you all. The floodgates have opened and I can hardly see to type. But I think I needed to be told it would be OK to let her go. I can't work out how to respond individually, but thank you to you all. To the person who said about getting the vet to come to us. I agree. We did that when we lost our cat about ten years ago and while devastating, it was also beautiful. We also need to ensure our adult sons, who had their formative years with her are able to say their goodbyes. And other relatives who have also loved her. Thank you all. I thought maybe I was being selfish in thinking to end the misery, but you have helped enormously to make me realise I need to let her go.

OP posts:
BlueJamSandwich · 27/05/2024 09:28

When my parents got to a similar quality of life and were offered treatment to prolong their lives, they both refused treatment and chose to die. Your dog hasn't got a voice but if they had, what do you think they would say?

DarkForces · 27/05/2024 09:37

Well done. It's the right decision. It's the final kindness. You sound like an amazing owner and she's clearly had a wonderful life with you. Sending you strength x

takemeawayagain · 27/05/2024 09:39

It's unfair to prolong this OP, get people round to see her today and then get her an appointment asap. Don't faff around waiting for 'other relatives that have loved her' to be able to come and visit her in this sad state. You need to put her needs before them.

Churchview · 27/05/2024 09:44

Oh OP, I so feel your pain. It is time to let your dear old friend go. It's so hard, but your last act of love for her will be to give her peace. She sounds like a darling dog who was very lucky to have such a love and fun filled life with such caring, devoted owners.

AnOpinionInTheHand · 27/05/2024 09:50

it sounds like she’s suffering if she won’t eat, can barely walk, pees herself and just lays trembling. Don’t delay for the sake of having family and friends round to see her - that’s not fair to her.

tattychicken · 27/05/2024 09:57

Yes I agree with the PPs. I know it's a BH but ring the vet today and ask them to come out. Nothing is to be gained by delaying.

If the family love her like you say they will understand and would not want her suffering prolonged. She comes first.

AbjectFailure · 27/05/2024 10:08

Thank you all. I have spoken to the vets just now and they agree it's time to say goodbye. Increasing pain relief while we wait for a plan on someone coming out because we don't want her to go through the ordeal of a car journey. I appreciate everyone's responses, and of course she comes first.

OP posts:
DarkForces · 27/05/2024 10:09

You've made the right decision. Hugs. It's awful but it's worth our pain to save theirs x

FlippityFloppityFlump · 27/05/2024 10:09

I agree with the pp, that she sounds like she is suffering and the right thing for her is to let her go as soon as possible. Hopefully your adult sons and others can see her today but it's not fair to your Ddog to make her wait any longer, just so they can see her. You need to put her first.
Hold her, stroke her, tell her how much everyone loves her but let her go as soon you can.

Like many others I know your pain. Nearly 2 years now since we had to do this for Ddog with only 12 hours notice as he became ill very suddenly. He was my best friend and it was the hardest things I have ever done.

Ddog became ill so quickly and we had to say goodbye that it took DS8 days to understand that we hadn't just not bothered trying to save Ddog and there was nothing the vets could do for him 💔

I am so sorry op. It is utterly heartbreaking. Sending love to you all

SmallGreens · 27/05/2024 10:10

You're letting her suffer. It's your job as an owner to not allow that to happen.

Let her go 💐

isthismylifenow · 27/05/2024 10:17

I am so sorry OP. As someone who recently lost my beloved girl, I really do get it.

You are able to say goodbye, and although it may not seem like it today, in time you will be take comfort from this.

Sending you strength Flowers

eileandubh · 27/05/2024 10:17

This is the right thing to do - and my heart goes out to you because we were in your shoes last year. We couldn't bear to let our brave little terrier go 'without trying everything', and in the end our gentle vet just said, We could do this... but it's time.

Be kind to yourself, as well as to your lovely DDog.

Remagirl · 27/05/2024 10:17

It's heartbreaking and I feel so sad for you. You need to call the vet and arrange for her to be pts. I always have our vet come to the house to minimise stress, is this an option? This is your final act of love for the years of devotion your wee doggy has given you.

Remagirl · 27/05/2024 10:18

AbjectFailure · 27/05/2024 10:08

Thank you all. I have spoken to the vets just now and they agree it's time to say goodbye. Increasing pain relief while we wait for a plan on someone coming out because we don't want her to go through the ordeal of a car journey. I appreciate everyone's responses, and of course she comes first.

Sorry, our posts crossed. Thinking of you xx

tattychicken · 27/05/2024 10:27

Well done you. Absolutely the right call for your beloved girl.