I can’t cope with my dog anymore

[ItWasntMeantToBe]

I’ve namechanged as I expect that people will be unkind, but here goes.

We have a dachshund who will just not stop loudly barking unless we stay with him.
I feel like a prisoner to him. I struggle with even cleaning the house without him barking and disturbing the neighbours, because he doesn’t like the sound of the hoover, but also doesn’t like being alone. He also is not completely house trained so he pees on things. If he has spent time in the garden it gets worse because he then thinks he can pee where he likes when he comes back in. He has a strong prey drive and if he sees a cat or bird through the window he barks and then pees underneath the window to mark his territory. We have tried all of the training, but he’s a very stubborn dog. He’s 3, so I don’t think this is going to get any better.

Ive realised too late in the game that we are just not dog people. We grew up with pet dogs (not dachshunds), so thought we knew what we were doing and letting ourselves in for.
I don’t know what to do. My DC would be heartbroken to have him rehomed. We love him too, but it’s no life for any of us. He has even barked and snapped at us at times when we have needed to leave the room he is in.

I think in an ideal situation our dog needs someone who is retired without any young DC at home. He needs that level of time spent with him, without the chaos of children around him.

I know all of this makes us bad people, so I don’t need a pile-on. I’m very aware we have failed him. I just would like to know what would you do in our position?

That does indeed sound shit OP. Has he been neutered? Have you had any input from a behaviourist? Male dachshunds are little shits though - my DB has one and he's seriously hard work. Of all the family dogs, he's the one with the biggest attitude who wants to pick fights all the time, he's such a dick!

Have you consulted with a trainer or a behaviourist? Or used an online training programme if in person help would be too expensive?

Get in tough with a suitable rescue NOW, be willing to go on a waiting list for a space if necessary.

A very quick Google informs me that there are at least 2 charities that ' specialise ' in this breed

1. Dachshund Rescue are a UK-based charity whose aim is to provide loving & permanent homes for Dachshunds whose owners, for whatever reason, can no longer keep them.

and 2.Our primary mission at ' The Red Foundation ' is to protect the health and well-being of every dog in our care.

either/both should be able to help you.

@ladybirdsanchez We haven’t had him neutered. The vet told us that instances of the back condition IVDD are higher in neutered male dachshunds.

If you can find a good home for your dog then do rehome him asap.
You made a mistake getting him and chose a difficult breed, you may also not have trained him properly or consistently (you don't say).
If there is a good alternative where he is guaranteed to be happier then take it but if not you will have to put as much money or energy into the situation to make it easier for all of you

You need Perfectly Polite Dachshunds.

We have used online programmes. The problem is his desire to bark outweighs even his favourite foods/treats.
He has come close to choking on a treat before because if something triggers him he will swallow a treat whole, just so he can have it and then get his bark out.

We have two dachshunds. They are yappy- that is their breed, we have taught them quiet and we tell them off but they will bark. Both are neutered- my girl had IVDD but my boy hasn't, I think in your situation you should try neutering but honestly that is their personality.
It sounds like he may have a bit of separation anxiety if he doesn't like you leaving him to clean- we worked on that a lot and now they don't bark when we go out.

Unfortunately it sounds like you've found out the hard way that dachshunds, whilst adorable, are little arseholes with massive gobs. They're unlike so many other small breeds because the hound in them really shines through.

It sounds like you're starting to become understandably resentful of the restrictions he imposes on your life (I've been there so not a dig in anyway!)
Based on that I would look to rehome him if I was you as the situation is unlikely to improve without an enormous group effort and alot of dedication.
Be aware that many normal rescues are bursting at the seams and will often turn away dogs that they don't feel they will be able to rehome. He doesn't sound like he'd cope too well in a kennel environment either.

There are some fantastic Dachshund specific rescues who will more than likely take him on though, the one I would recommend getting in touch with, as per a PP is here:
https://theredfoundation.net/#:~:text=Our%20primary%20mission%20at%20The,simply%20walk%20away%20from%20them.

I really hope you can find a solution that works for all of you, best of luck x

These are all training issues, which is good news because it means with the right help they’re at least partially resolvable.

You want to get the vet to refer you to a qualified behaviourist or a vet with a behavioural specialty.

They can be a difficult breed. Definitely not a breed for unseasoned dog owners or young families. I think it's less that you're not a dog person, OP, and more of a case that you've chosen a breed that requires lots of graft,input, dedication, training that can be hard to carve out if life is already full and you don't have the 'give'. Some breeds require 'extra' and Dachshund is one. All breeds actually require work, dedication, lots of training (and this is a lifelong thing because, just like humans, dogs require system updates because of needs and behavioural changes that can come with age- i.e. my older dog's recall is shit. It used to be stellar, the stuff of envy! I reboot and update the training every so often.).

Try not to feel too guilty about making the right decision (which means heartache but it sounds like it's the sensible and necessary thing to do). And normally I read these threads and think, 'Come on, OP. Try harder.' But in your case, I think you are absolutely right in realising that this is not working and it won't work. But it will work with someone else who can give the dog what it needs. That's not to say you haven't tried!

If you do get another dog, I recommend choosing an 'easy' family friendly breed (no such thing really but some are more cooperative and easier to train). But take time and don't rush back into dog ownership. You need a big breather. Good luck for you and for your doggy, who will be loved and looked after in a way that will work for him.

Dachshunds are one of those little dogs that often surprise people by having huge personalities and being very bolshy and challenging to train. If you were hoping for an easy first dog a dachshund definitely wasn't the place to start.

Neutering might help, especially with the marking, but as a pp said, this is just dachshunds. A behaviourist who specialises in the breed might help if you can find one?

Residential training

@OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon Thanks for the names of places. I feel awful even considering it, but we can’t go on as we are.

@Hoppinggreen I think we have been consistent with him, but with DC in the mix too, there may have been times when he’s had mixed messages. I want our dog to be happy. The sad thing is he’s always happy to see us, he just doesn’t know there are more suitable homes out there for him.

@DogDream What is Perfectly polite dachshunds?

@Welshgirl10 That’s the funny thing about our dog. He actually barks less when we are completely out of the house. We don’t let him in the bedrooms, but if he knows we are upstairs he howls and barks. If he knows we are in the house he barks. If we are home he expects to be glued to us, but it’s difficult because he’s a standard sized dachshund so not easily carried around and because he pees a bit in the house we can’t entirely trust him in the carpeted areas of our house.

@ToffeenutLatte thank you for your understanding post. The thought of rehoming him isn’t ideal, but he’s such hard work. I feel my DC miss out on so much because the main focus in the house has to be the dog, the way things are.

@SerenityNowInsanityLater Thanks for your kind and understanding post. I want what’s best for everyone. It’s so hard. If we rehome him I definitely won’t get another dog though!

@MonsteraMama Yes, I completely underestimated what they were like. I’d researched them a bit before we had him. I underestimated how stubborn, vocal and difficult to toilet train they were though! My biggest worry was the back issue they can develop, and my main focus was on their positive characteristics. I now know that was a mistake.

@Chewinggumwall thank you for suggesting this. I didn’t know there were residential places that did training like this. A quick google brought up a place that does it near me, so I will definitely look into that before making any final decisions.

I see a 3yo daschund on our walks who was just neutered due to marking indoors. They said it worked perfectly.

That’s positive to hear.
I was worried it was ‘too late’ to correct this sort of behaviour with neutering.

I wouldn’t touch residential training with someone else’s bargepole…

training a dog is mostly training you to get the best from them, residential training at best can’t really do that and at worst may use methods that could make your dog much worse.

Perfectly polite dachshunds is a Facebook group - they may even have their own website - definitely worth a look before you make any big decisions. I’m a first time dog owner of a three year old female dachshund- she is also loud and likes to bark at the wind … we have accepted it as part of her breed but she is also pretty well behaved most of the time.

@ItWasntMeantToBe
He actually barks less when we are completely out of the house

This is because he is alerting you to something, or trying to tell you something by shouting at you. If you aren't there, there is nobody to shout at, so he doesn't.

My lab will bark when someone comes to the front door, but not if he is by himself as there is no point.

I have a barker and it's frustrating as hell at times.
What works best for her is just ignoring it for a bit. Don't give it attention. When she worked out that barking wasn't working to get her what she wanted she dramatically reduced it.

At the same time I was teaching her alternative ways of getting my attention.
I also taught her a very clear settle down command. If I send her to bed or to settle then she does and although she sometimes grumbles about it she usually does as she is told.

Make sure he's not bored. Decent walk with lots of sniffing. More sniffing less speed. Look for enrichment toys that can be filled with treats and get him working to try and keep his brain occupied.

Reward the quiet.

If he's barking out the window make sure he can't see out. My front windows all have frosted film over them so mine can't see out. That alone knocked the barking back by half.
If he can hear noises outside and reacting to them - put noise on in the house to drown it out.

Look up the dog geeks online. It run by 3 amazing force free behaviourist who do regular zoom sessions and have hundreds of hours of video tutorials to help.

@carerlookingtochangejob your post is so helpful, thank you! I will look up the dog geeks.
I have been closing the curtains lately to stop him looking out at the cats/birds, but he reacts to the neighbours dogs yapping (they have much quieter barks than him though), and it’s like they both want the last bark. He also seems to bark at nothing that I can identify.
What other ways did you teach your dog to get your attention?

He just sounds like a spoilt brat. You need to do what you would do with a child. Tell him off firmly Say NO and do t let him have his way. Ignore the barking he is controlling you When he snaps and barks at you him straight into another room he will get the message ! As for the toilet I dont know what you can do for that. Would drive me insane. Why do people get These tiny dogs they don't seem to have much sense atall.

@tabulahrasa Yes, I was wondering how it would work when he was back home.

@LolaCrapola Thanks for the information about perfectly polite dachshunds.

@HappiestSleeping Yes, that makes sense. The trouble is I think what he’s trying to tell me is when I’m home I have to be permanently by his side! I read AFTER we got him that dachshunds are known as ‘Velcro dogs’ because they like to be permanently attached to you, it’s really true in his case. But it’s really hard going. Combined with the peeing it feels like I’m almost trapped in the puppy phase, though he is good with other commands and thankfully he does sleep right through the night.

@carerlookingtochangejob has some good advice. You need to work out what your dog is getting out of his behaviour. Somewhere you are rewarding him barking even if you don't think you are. For example ,if any of you shout at him to stop barking, all he will hear is "wahay, this is great, we are all shouting now".

Ignore what you don't like, reward what you do like, however be aware that you have to reward within 1 second of the behaviour you do like. No use him being quiet, then you wander off to the kitchen to get a treat, come back and say "good boy" as he will think he is being rewarded for doing whatever he was doing when you came back.

@HappiestSleeping I didn’t realise they had to be rewarded that instantly. I have been making that reward mistake then. The treats are close, but not close enough to do it in 1 second, more 5 seconds away. I will put them in my pocket tomorrow.

Thanks everyone for your helpful comments. I will take it all on board and implement as much of it as I can. Rehoming is the very last resort. Tomorrow is another day, today was particularly bad.