It's an ethics question

[Pumpkintopf]

Just would like others' opinions on this really-

A dear elderly friend has asked me to be executor for her will. She has two six year old dogs, chihuahuas. When discussing her will and plans she stated that she wants her son to take the dogs after her death and have them put to sleep. This is regardless of the age and health of the dogs at the time of her death, or whether her husband survives her.

She wasn't open to any suggestions I came up with including cinnamon trust, leaving money in her will to provide for the dogs' insurance and care to encourage adoption etc. She tells me her son agrees with her views, in her opinion the dogs would be unhappy in any other environment and 'there are worse things than an easy death'.

I'm trying to understand but tbh this is really playing on my mind and I'm not sure I can continue to be involved as it's so far removed from my own views. Am I being unreasonable? (Have deliberately posted here as particularly want the views of dog people!)

Thanks

OP hasn’t said what sort of behavioural issues the dogs have - and given they’re Chis there are bound to be loads. Two dogs like that don’t get adopted. And six is old enough to put lots of people off - the fact there’s two makes it even harder

I understand her thinking and I would probably wish I could make the same choice.

Yes and no.

The no because it is awful to kill a healthy animal.

Yes because if the dogs have severe separation anxiety from her and she dies they will be distraught and not all dogs recover from their loss.

There is also the fact that if they do t find a loving home they are condemned to a dog home if centre which would be incredibly distressing after their home comforts and they could be there a very long time.

They also may end up being separated.

It's a sad situation but ultimately her selfishness in having young dogs whilst elderly is to blame.

I have heard this a few times in my life. Some people think others couldn’t possibly look after their pets as well as them! A friend of mine had it in her will for her horse. While I understand that it’s not the worst thing that could happen to the pets, as they’d know nothing, and I get that it means there is no risk of them ending up in a bad situation post death of the owner, I think it strange if they’ve being offered good solutions (like the OP offering to take the dogs - it’s actually a bit insulting to the OP that her friend said no!). In the case of my friend, her husband ignored that part of her wishes and the horse was looked after by friends for another decade until he was pts when he was elderly and starting to suffer.

OP has offered to take them - I assume she knows the dogs.

I'm all for PTS when the situation demands it (and have done so with my own animals), but these dogs aren't even being given a chance by their owner. That is not moral or acceptable when an alternative (the OP, who is a close friend) is ready and waiting.

There could be very valid reasons for the friend to not want the dogs to be re-homed though - we only have one side of the story and one person's version of events.

Personally I think there are worse fates for dogs than being put to sleep and I don't think it's fair to say it's immoral and unacceptable when we know nothing about the situation except what OP has chosen to tell us.

As an aside, and this isn't meant as an attack on the OP, but just because someone offers a home, doesn't mean they're actually a suitable owner.

Exactly this, and I'd add 'for that dog'.

If this woman dropped dead tomorrow the dogs are 6 yo , 6 yo chihuahuas are likely one of the easiest pets to rehome . If they were elderly dogs I could see the owners pov but not when potentially she is putting down a barely middle aged dog .

@Floralnomad well behaved chihuahuas would be easy to rehome but we know nothing about their behaviour or their history.

I'm not saying it's necessarily the right thing to do, just that we're only getting one side of the story and there may well be more to it.

Worthless anecdote coming up. I volunteered in a vets many years ago. Someone brought a tortoise in to be PTS as they could no longer be bothered with it. The vet agreed and also said he’d dispose of the body. The tortoise went home with one of the nurses.

Do not ask questions. I have no further information.

While I understand that it’s not the worst thing that could happen to the pets, as they’d know nothing

And of course the dead owner will know nothing if they aren’t PTS. 😉

@fieldsofbutterflies that is a fair point , but the fact remains that I wouldn’t want to be acquainted with somebody who could do this .

I would decline the role of executor. I couldn't in good conscience be involved with this decision. PPs have mentioned situations with dogs who display extremely challenging behaviour, but there is no indication that these dogs do. If they are fit and healthy, there is no reason they couldn't go to another home especially as you've offered @Pumpkintopf! There is something very troubling about someone who wants to kill her dogs in the event of her own death, as though she is essential to their survival in a bizarre way.

Thank you all for taking the time to reply. I really appreciate the time and thought you've given and it's exactly what I wanted, to get different and dissenting views.

For those who've asked - the dogs have no SA or behavioural issues and as far as I'm aware are fit and healthy.

Chihuahuas have a lifespan of 12 to 20 years, so if the elderly woman died tomorrow these animals would be killed - for no good reason - 6 to 14 years before the end of their normal life span. That's awful.

As the OP says, these dogs have no health or behavioural issues. They could stay with her until a suitable home was found and go on to make ideal companions for elderly, infirm or housebound people with a little garden. They'd be a gift for someone who doesn't want a puppy - because they are retired perhaps.

Having rescued several dogs over the years, including a chihuahua, I can say, hand on heart that they settle in so quickly and are happy within days. The original owners would be shocked and insulted by how quickly their dogs move on in a new loving home I think.

This will is cruel and I could be no part of it.

They will. My granny put the same request in her will. The dog was to be destroyed on her death. You'd be surprised what vets will do.

Just another thought. If they came from a decent breeder they will have signed a contract saying if they can’t keep the dogs then they are to be returned to the breeder.

What does the husband say?

Does she worry he won’t be kind to them? They may have disagreements about how to handle dogs and she’s worried about the house rules when she’s gone- no dogs upstairs, on laps, etc.

@Wolfiefan fair point, not sure, will ask.

@AGlinnerOfHope more that she's concerned he won't give them proper care - can be forgetful etc. Not sure he's been consulted on her plans for them, she did state they were solely 'owned' by her.

I can see why she’d rather die happy the dogs were covered. I guess he could refuse to let them go to someone who’d look after them properly.

Would not agree with this, only in circumstances like @Devilshands described or if dog was ill/elderly. 6 is very young and with no behavioural problems seems mad to pts healthy dogs.

I think it depends on how likely she is to die soon! ‘elderly’ could mean 70 or it could mean 85, which would also make the dog decision rather different. What would happen if she becomes disabled,,or has to go into care where they are unlikely to accept two dogs, however well behaved and small. If she thinks she is good for another ten years, well , I wouldn’t be too exercised about the dogs’ fate.

What I don’t understand is why she wants you to be the executor when she has an adult son. Quite apart from animal issues, executing a will can be time consuming and quite complex. If she doesn’t want her family to do this, she should instruct a professional, not burden a friend with it.

I would just decline gracefully and say you don’t think you could handle the responsibility. No need to go into detail.

Mm. It’s not ideal really but I think I can understand her concerns. The dogs will be 7+ years old and that’s definitely past the easiest age to rehome. She must really hate the thought of them left, pining for her, with no guarantee of a good home. That being said, putting them down, when they’re healthy and happy and possibly only just into middle age seems very harsh. It’s not an easy one.
If I were to die tomorrow, and I had no willing family, I’d want my older dog to be put down. He’s 11 and set in his ways and would be bereft without me. But he’s so much older of course.
I suppose her dogs may be elderly by the time she goes, in which case, I couldn’t argue with her logic at all. Pts would be kindest.

Jeez I feel as if that’s surely almost bordering on illegal. OP, that’s really upsetting annd truly awful, you’re 100% right to feel as you soo, I don’t know anyone who would ever think along those lines to do this. I couldn’t be involved.