We are both 65, we have lost our beautiful dog. 65 is too old for a puppy, isn't it?

[Slowslowreader]

It's not now I'm worried about. We are both well and active and wfh. It's 10 and 15 years time. We have been offered by friend and local farmer a beautiful little collie (as we had before) from his new litter. We know the parents and grandparents, they are gorgeous dogs. But what when we grow old? There is no family to take them on. We could afford a dog walker, but even so, we would be old. My father had dementia by late 70s. It could be me.

You’ve got more time than we have as full time workers and our pup has turned out just fine!

Take a look at any dog show. Vast amounts of competitors are over 60. I teach over 60s agility. Most of them buy puppies.

Would the breeder take back if you become unable to care for the dog? I know this happens.

Do it.

I’m 53 and want a puppy but worried about the same thing. There’s no longevity in my family so it worries me what would happen if I die before the dog. The thought of it going to a shelter breaks my heart. 😢

I think you should definitely get dog, but I wouldn't get a puppy at your age. Sorry. There are so many older dogs that need homes. I couldn't fathom my dog outliving me and dh and then having to be rehomed. I know that could happen at any age, but it's just obviously more likely the older you get.

My DM got a small breed puppy at 76, he is her pride and joy. He is also her protector and wellbeing support! Do you have anyone prepared to take on the dog if you can no longer cope?

You are definitely not too old but I would consider a different breed, border collies require alot of mental and physical stimulation.

Another dog is a great idea but I don't think it's the puppy you've been offered. He's from working lines and a collie to boot. There will be plenty out there who are a better match.

I'm a few years older than you and have just come through a few years of caring for a seriously ill partner, losing him, and then losing one of our two dogs. The dogs were a lifeline for both of us, and the remaining one still is for me, but there is no way I would have been able to cope if I'd had a young dog to look after as well. Now I'm finding it harder to get out to build a new life when it's not fair to leave my remaining dog alone after she's had a lifetime of companionship from one of us or her brother. She's family and I absolutely wouldn't be without her, but now that I'm alone there are things I have to manage that I didn't forsee.

If I still have my health when she passes my plan is to travel and do some of the things I can't easily do now, and then to get a pair of older dogs who are happy with a quiet life.

DM got a working lab puppy for her 70th birthday. 12 years later, widowed, single cancer patient with long covid, walking a lab everyday is hard work. She spends a lot of money on a dog walker, we have looked for volunteers to walk her (Cinnamon Trust, Borrow My Doggy) but there is nothing locally.

I'd say 65 was very marginal. Maybe an older rescue dog would work better.

My instinct is to say get the dog.

You are active and compassionate people working from home, used to dogs. You are acquiring the dog from a friend whom you know and presumably trust hugely. You are familiar with the parents and grandparents. In every respect other than your age this is perfect.

There is at least one fly in every ointment when it comes to getting a dog, at least one possible issue that could make the experience problematic. Yours is your concerns about your future fitness. But that isn't a brand new concern. Presumably it was present to some extent in your fifties. The odds just creep up a bit year by year.
You aren't doomed to become unable to take excellent care of this dog in your 70s. I regularly do long guided walks with a walk leader well into her seventies who has a lively young collie of about three. We did 15 miles the other way in very hilly country. When you get to this person's age, your dog will be past middle age

And in any case, you could begin making plans for any possible problems from the beginning. Contacting collie rescues, building up relationships with them, learning which ones you could trust with your dog if the worst came to the worst. xxx

You are not too old. Get the puppy.

this thread has made me realise why shelters are over run. So many people advising to get the puppy and focussing on the wants of the owner with little thought for what will happen to the dog.

such Naivety about how easy it would be to rehome an adult dog.

Op is one of the few sensible people who is actually showing concern for the long term welfare of the animal

The puppy and adolesent years with collies are hard but once you get them trained and they mature they are just the best dogs. Mine is 6 now and she really is very chilled. She gets lots of exercise, but what they crave is mental stimulation. Ie training, learning new things, activities that's satisfy their herding instinct, if you have time for that a slightly less Mobile person will be fine with an older collie.

In a former role I worked on a project trying to support older people in their homes who had any number of conditions- mobility problems, dementia, etc.

The number of people who were simply unable to care for their pets was heartbreaking- yet we could not do much about it unless the animals were voluntarily released to the care of a willing family member or the RSPCA or other rescues. I can't tell you how many awful scenes we witnessed - animals who the owner forgot to feed - pets left at home when the owner had to go into hospital and no-one sorted them out properly - I won't go on.

I vowed to never allow any pet of mine be at risk of that situation. Our last 2 cats were elderly girls who went to the RSPCA when their owners died.

I'd honestly not encourage it. You might be fine at 65 but after that?

My neighbour recently got a terrier puppy. She's 90 FFS and quite active now and totally on the ball mentally but she has no family. DH and I are on the watch as we expect at some point we will need to step in.

From my perspective- don't do it.

My MIL just got a puppy at 81! It's not a collie, it's a small breed that doesn't need a lot of exercise, but as you say, you can afford a dog walker. I'd go for it OP. 65 isn't that old and I honestly think that having a dog and getting out for walks every day is really good for anyone's health, but particularly older people who may have fewer reasons to get out every day otherwise. My dad is 81 and has two large dogs that he walks every day and he has coronary artery disease. I honestly think that his fitness has saved his life on several occasions now. And it's the dogs that keep him fit.

I would get a rescue dog, an older one.

A million families would take a puppy.

There's so many dogs in shelters that need quiet homes with no kids.

@Slowslowreader I know your dilemma because I got a springer puppy at age 62 and I WFH and it was very stressful. He's not my first springer so I was aware, like a collie, that it's not a lap dog who can be walked around the block once a day. However I had forgotten how much hard work a puppy is.

Without family back up it will be very difficult, all of my family offers dwindled away once the novelty wore off or they had other priorities. What is your lifestyle, will a dog restrict you? A lot of what we do now is affected by having a dog.

Far from WFH with a puppy curled at my feet, my days were spent scattering kibble on the floor with one hand while trying to take a work call, walking around the house with a puppy hanging off my skirt, and crying (me not the puppy) My DH was also suddenly hospitalised for a while so I had to do a lot of it on my own.

I took regular breaks from my work to take him out, to train and stimulate him and it was tiring. I realised that despite WFH we needed a dog walker, trial and error until we found the right fit and now 4 times a week he goes on group walks in woods and fields. We are all better for it. He is also out every day with one or both of us.

He is 2 so I will grow old with him, he costs a fortune in food, vet bills, insurance, dog walking and adds a few hundred onto a holiday for boarding. He's well trained though, and he will often lie at my feet now while I'm working.

I will be 65 next year and will say that without family back up I would not get a puppy. I would walk someone else's or have them when their owners went on holiday.

Re: what @4YellowDaffodils said - this awful situation could be mitigated by proper planning. Would the farmer take the dog back, for instance, if you became too unwell to care for it? Dogs Trust has a plan you can join to care for your dog in the event of illness or death: https://www.dogstrust.org.uk/how-we-help/ownership/canine-care-card. And if you have no family who could take the dog, do you at least have family who could step in and make tough decisions about its welfare, if needed?

Agreed. And aghast at the people saying that if the dog gets too much or something happens the OP can “just rehome it”. JFC.

My SIL has agreed to take MIL's dog, if MIL can't cope/becomes unwell/dies. Also, the OP has a DP/DH - it would unlikely for both to become incapacitated at the same time. I agree it's much more of a risk for a single elderly person, particularly if that person has no family or makes no contingency plans.

You are probably the perfect age? Better than a young couple who are juggling work and kids as you will probably devote lots of time to the dog. But what about travel? Will having a dog restrict you?

We have a border collie, I was 57 and DH 61, he’s 6 years old now, I am fitter now than I was before, DH although having had heart bypass is also very fit. We’re both retired and say if we didn’t have the dog to walk each day, we would be very unfit and overweight. We meet many older people with dogs, who are another breed, they all say border collies are the best, but hard work so they went with another easier breed, most say they regret not getting another border collie. We have family, but they work, so basically we are on our own. I don’t know if I could do the puppy stage again.

I'm going to be honest.
I really think a puppy, particularly a high energy breed, isn't a good idea at 65.

Being involved in rescue I can assure you that the shelters are not over run by older people having their dogs rehomed.

It is usually a younger demographic, we got pregnant, we have moved house, our work commitment change, the dog chases our childrens friend we dont have time for the dog as we have kids we cant aford the dog due to col etc.

having owned collies for many years collie pups are the easiest of puppies (completely different to a lab or spaniel that can be really hard work as puppies) Collies are not some magic breed that need hours and hours of exercise but they do need attention. Maybe the OP if they are not working will have more time than younger people.

When I think of the collie we just lost, when she was 10, no way could either she or I have survived rehoming. She always knew where I was, she couldn't rest until she knew I was at my desk, or gone shopping and would come back, or whatever. If I gave her a biscuit when I left she would look after it until I came back, and then eat it. She understood far more than people think dogs can grasp, as we discovered when we taught her to 'choose' between two words, she began to be able to tell us who and what she wanted. So she could for instance, choose 'walk to -named place- with- named person- with coat or not.' And tell us if she was hungry or needed a drink, tired or wanted to go out, and if the garden would be enough, or if she'd rather have a walk. Do not underestimate the intelligence of your dogs, dog people. You get out what you put in, and it can be far more than just your daily exercise and companionship. That's why I have this dilemma. I would love a puppy to teach again, cf. a rescue from an unknown background. And why I am afraid of getting a puppy and being too old to look after it.
But it's true you cannot step in the same river twice. Maybe she was my once in a lifetime dog.

I wonder what the average age of people posting against getting a puppy at 65 is?

65 is not old. There are many many 75 years old who are more active than I am.

I can think of a better life for a young active dog than with a fit couple who have time for the dog

I'm a cat person and wouldn't get a kitten at 65. I would however get an older cat.