How do you know when it's time?

[DollyPollyHolly]

Just that really, how did you know it was time to put your fur baby to sleep?

Our girl is 11 and we've had her from day dot. She's struggling more and more recently and the vets have advised that we've reached a point where there's nothing more they can do if her medication doesn't perk her up. I'm absolutely heartbroken and can't even bare the thought of her not being here.

Our boy was getting older and we'd thought it would be if his back legs gave up or he became incontinent. It actually ended up being an aggressive tumour which started to press on a nerve and he cried in pain a couple of times. I thought it was his legs being stiff so off to the vet we went expecting to get yu move or painkillers or something. We had to wait a couple of days for the first emergency appt and his pain got more, and he looked at me a couple of times and I knew he'd had enough so ramped up the treats etc over those 2 days.
It sounds like your vet is gently suggesting it might be getting close to time. I'm so sorry, it's the hardest thing we can do for our fur babies but the kindest too.

With my previous dogs;

As soon as one became incontinent I made the decision - a dog that can't hold its own bladder and ends up laying in its own excrement overnight is not a dog that is living a good life.

With another, she had arthritis. Eventually it got to the point where she was so stiff and just no longer herself - even though she wasn't in pain and she could still walk, there was no spark left in her. She was miserable. I couldn't keep her alive suffering like that.

One of my current dogs is ten. She should have another 3-4 years in her based on her breed. Realistically? I think maybe another two years. She gets slower and stiffer each day and although she can still do long walks and plays, her personality is becoming grumpier and grumpier and she even snaps now (never has before). She's losing her sight and has no teeth already and I love her so much, but once she's no longer 'herself' (unwilling/unable to go on walks, not as hungry, sad and lethargic etc) I will know it's time.

Ultimately, it is an act of kindness. It won't make you feel better thinking about it. But it is better that it is a day to early than a day to late - you will look back on it one day and be so glad she didn't suffer any more.

You have given her the best life, and given that she is 11 you have made the right decisions to provide her with that life. Remember that. You'll know when it's time and you'll know that you made the final right decision.

I'm really sorry, OP.

Thank you. I can't even think about it without crying. It's just so hard to know when is the right time.

She's struggling with her breathing and seems a bit restless and fed up but then when her breathing is ok, she's happy to potter about. I'm just questioning myself and whether I'm making the decision too soon. It's so hard 😓

She's my baby and has been through every milestone with us. I can't imagine her not being here.

i don’t have any advice but I’ve always heard its better a day (or maybe week) too soon than a day too late.

I always read that usually you’ll know why it’s time or the pet will know and you’ll just be like yep it is.

It's so hard. I was just thinking today that our old dog doesn't have any fun anymore. Such a happy, gorgeous, alert part of the family dog she was. Now she plods. Eats. Get's stiff and sad. I keep waiting for the brightness to come back, but perhaps it never will.

I my experience, you just know. They tell you. I once had the world's daftest dog going - an utter clown. By age 17 his back legs had almost entirely gone, and he was disabled, but drop a crumb on the floor and he could break the land speed record. The day that he had no interest at all in the treat, that was the day I knew.

Tonight has shown us it must happen soon. She can barely rest without jumping up again to steady her breathing. She's just wandering aimlessly staring into space. I'm going to ring the vets in the morning 😭