Don’t know whether to keep dog

[hugshugshugs]

Hi. I would love some advice on my 9 month cocker boy. He’s honestly been a nightmare ever since I got him. He’s got a very sensitive stomach which makes me feel like most of his life he’s had diarrhoea. About two months into getting him I was pregnant with two small children consistently cleaning diarrhoea from my house. He ruined all the beautiful bedding and crate covers I’ve bought and I’ve spent a fortune going through every type of food on the market and chews before going to a dog nutritionist who suggest I follow his recipes and make dog food which is so now. I hide his food in food puzzles everyday and cook fresh chicken which I stuff in kings and snuffle mats licky mats and all sorts to keep him entertained which he whizzes through in about 40 minutes.

I live in London I literally moved house to have a small yard to let him poop in. Before I had to take him across the road leaving my 1 year old in the house by himself with his older sibling until I came back. Now he has a small yard which helps. We have changed cars to fit a dog carrier in the back. We take him to the park a couple of days a week and walks daily. He’s terrible on the lead despite me spending thousands on trainers and throwing chicken around for months trying to get him to look at me. I’ve recently tried a figure 8 collar which helps but it’s not perfect especially with pigeons and dogs. I have one child in a pram and one by my side and another coming and. Just don’t know whether this is worth sticking out!? Apparently cockers don’t calm down until 2-3 years and I just wanted to know if anyone has experience of puppies and small shildren is it worth it or should I of waited until they were older? He does make the kids smile occasionally but mostly he winds everyone up and gets left in his crate with a chew. My older child keep winding him up and over the last few days he taken a couple of snaps at her.

He’s also wakes everyone up at 6 am with howling and by the time I’m downstairs dressed with the kids half and hour later he does a wee in his crate. Should I just give up? I really feel like he doesn’t make me happy or really fit into the family and my partner leaves it all to me. Or is it going to get better and I’ll regret it? Sorry for long post I’m at my wits end emotional and constantly exhausted.

Why doesn't his wee happen before you spend half an hour busy with dc? That's frankly neglect....

What have I just read? Please rehome this dog with a reputable rescue - lots have been mentioned on this thread.

DO NOT ever get another animal. You did absolutely no research into cockers, and had no idea what you were doing. I don’t believe you’ll ever be a suitable family for a dog.

This may sound harsh but you’ve been incredibly selfish and you should never put an innocent animal, or your family through this ever again.

I’d definitely contact a spaniel specific charity for them to take him off your hands. You’ve tried your best, and with young children it makes it so difficult.

If in the future when the children are a little older and you want another dog, go to Battersea and re home one. That way their personality has been assessed and they’re there to support you.

We’ve re homed dogs because their owners have been honest and realised it’s too much for them. The last one being a young couple with 2 children under 4 and the wife returning to work after maternity. During her leave they purchased two labradors 🤦‍♀️, reality check when going back to work. It happens and they were devastated, but happy we’d re homed one of the dogs. We still give them updates 11 years later.

I wish you all the best, Cockers are notoriously little demons, akin to The Tasmanian Devil, take care 😊

Please rehome your poor dog. I lost my old spaniel back in October and reading your post makes me upset. He was such a good, loving boy once we got through the puppy stage. You are being horribly cruel to your dog.

OP I mean this with no mean spirit but it genuinely sounds as if you don’t like this dog very much. I think it’d be in both of your best interests to rehome.

Jesus wept
is this rage bait?!
you got a dog knowing you’d have to leave your 1 year old without adult supervision every time it needed the toilet. You talk about it like you had to and the dog should be appreciative you did that for it, and got a car that fit it. You chose this!
you picked an active working breed and you’re surprised it needs entertainment?
it howls for the toilet and you make it wait another half an hour then get annoyed when it effectively wets itself. It’s a baby!! Imagine potty training a toddler and then when they say they have to go, making them wait another half an hour.
and then you let your children wind it up and don’t want it to react.
and it hasn’t ‘ruined’ things. You give it food that makes the poor thing unwell. Accidentally or well intentioned or whatever, it’s obviously not feeling good, locked in his crate with chews (which I suspect are half your issue) being wound up, not getting love and care it needs and having to wet itself in its own bed.

it doesn’t matter how much you’ve spent on training, if you can’t work out the basics like leaving a young dog crying for the toilet waiting 30 mins, may cause it to have an accident, or that if you want a dog to wee outside it needs access to outside, I can’t imagine you’re tackling the rest with much sense.

Why did you get a puppy with 2 young kids ?
he’s miserable your miserable rehome the poor bugger and stop your kid from teasing it before he bites and gets put down instead

Definitely rehome. At his age all of this is very solveable in the right home and a breed specific rescue will easily rehome him. If you wait, it all becomes more of a problem and he becomes harder to rehome and it’s all worse for him.

You really were at the wrong point of life to get a dog, especially a high energy breed. The things that you list as the effort you’ve put in - trainers, feeds, changing car - yes they’re part of having a dog. Virtually everything you listed was predictable. Put your effort now in to getting him to a better home with the time to look after him.

You allow your kids to wind the poor pup up?! Poor thing, please rehome him so he can have a more peaceful life.

Re-home. You are not making the dog happy. Best not get another one.

Did you tell the breeder about your home set up? If you did, and were truthful to them, then I am beyond surprised that they let you have one of their puppies!! That's not right.

If you didn't tell them then this is wholly and totally on your head and you need to find that poor pup a proper home. You can't cope with a pet let alone a cocker spaniel.

Poor little soul.

How ridiculous

Re home the poor boy responsibly, he must be so miserable

And never get another pup 😡

People telling OP she's made a mistake - I think she knows this, hence her posting on here? I doubt she has set out to ruin this dog's (and her family's) life. She is not the first person to take on a dog she can't cope with - it happens all the time - I have a family member in this position at the moment who worked with and owned dogs all her life - very knowledgeable and responsible practitioner - but tried a new breed in retirement due to her changed circumstances and did not predict the needs of the specific individual dog she got - it happens! Not everyone can accurately predict the future all of the time.

The only thing for OP to do now is to act swiftly to re-home this dog to a more suitable home, and not get another dog unless and until her circumstances are significantly different.

Will the breeder take him back? When we bought our little schnauzer the contract included the proviso that the breeder would her back rather than rehoming.

Everyone makes mistakes. You bought a high energy high needs working dog and didn’t realise how much he’d need (lots don’t).

Rehome him through a spaniel rescue. Don’t beat yourself up. Some dogs are not suited to some homes.

This. Poor poor dog :( some people really should never ever have dogs- and never again.

Sorry, but no. Some PEOPLE are not suited to dogs. Makes me so upset- none of this is the dog's fault.

So rehome asap, via a rescue that will properly assess a forever home and family for it. Poor dog.

The problems the OP mentions have little to do with him being a spaniel - any breed could have a sensitive stomach , most breeds will need proper training to walk nicely on a lead , most breeds would snap if a child is allowed to wind them up , most pups will be nuts if they spend long periods in a cage with a chew , most 9 month old pups will have peed indoors if they have to wait 30 minutes after they’ve told you they need to go .

He does make the kids smile occasionally but mostly he winds everyone up and gets left in his crate with a chew.

This is disgusting.

Dogs do not get dumped in crates because YOU cannot be arsed to give it attention. What a bloody terrible owner you are. All the issues you have described as small. They are TINY. The fact is, you cannot be bothered to give the dog the attention, walks and stimulation it needs. It goes to the park a few times a week and walks every day? How long are the walks? Two minutes? Five minutes? Cos I bet it's nowhere near what he needs.

Rehome the dog, get in touch with spaniel aid.

Don't ever get another dog again.

People are often sold the Disney version of dog ownership. It’s hard. Puppies are awful. It does get better but it takes a good couple of years. I know many good, sensible people who are like the OP and just didn’t realise. Some slog it out and do ok. Some put the time in and end up with cracking dogs. Some rehome. All ok.

Im not casting judgement on someone I don’t know but do agree that rehoming sounds the best option.

And some can't rehome, and refuges are full to the brim, and some dogs stay there for years and years, and some forever, but no suitable home is available. EVERYONE knows this, EVERYONE.

You are stressed, the dog is stressed and I bet the DC are stressed too.
That doesn't sound like a happy family home.
Honestly, something has to give, so don't feel bad or guilty. Go contact the breeder, and breed rescue to see who can find him a suitable home...
Don't worry to much about the diarrhoea, it might just be stress related- one of my dog has stress inconvenience (that DC adequately named revenge pee/ poo.)

This

Please contact Spaniel Aid and find your dog a more suitable home.

As it stands, you have two small children, you're pregnant and you have an adolescent spaniel that you can't even take out to the toilet in time to stop it having accidents in its' bed on a regular basis.

Your children don't know how to behave around the dog (unsurprising given their ages) and your solution is to just shut it a crate instead.

This set-up is so grossly unfair on that poor dog and its' unhappiness is screaming out through its' behaviour. You need to do the right thing and find him a more appropriate home. And then don't get another.