Considering a family dog

[Fivebyfive2]

Hi, just looking for a bit of guidance.

We are thinking of adding a dog to our family, not immediately but in the next year or two. It's me, DH and our 4 year old son. We have an average size 3 bed semi with an enclosed garden and an easy walk to 2 parks. I work 3 days a week 9-5 from the office and DH works 5 days a week 7am-2pm, mostly from home. No other pets. For holidays we'd either take dog with us or leave with our good friend who runs a really good dog boarding service.

Ideally we'd like a mid size dog (we're all quiet small and don't want the dog taking us for walks!) that's good with children and likes a mix of muddy walks and having a fuss/play at home. In my heart I'd love a rescue dog (we both had rescue dogs growing up) but I know with a young child it might not be the best / easiest decision so would also be open to a puppy and we'd of course do all the training classes etc. There are quite a few in our area I've noticed.

We're thinking either a retired greyhound (we almost adopted one a few years ago but I was still working full time then and it felt unfair so we didn't go ahead) or a cavalier king Charles spaniel (our friend has one who comes over sometimes and I've read they're a good breed for families with children?)

Any suggestions or advice would be welcome!

Does WFH 7-2 mean he won't be able to give the dog any attention (i.e. not even a quick fuss, take it out to go to the toilet when it's being housetrained etc)? Or is it 'WFH 7-2 but not glued to his laptop all that time'? (Some dogs are better at taking care of themselves than others!)

How much exercise is the key question tbh. Is this going to be a dog that gets 30 minutes once a day, or a dog that gets 1hr twice a day, or something in between?

Sorry! Not helpful, but if you can give a bit more detail as those things are quite key, it'll help people suggest dogs 😊

My initial suggestion is a Cavalier (smaller than mid, but pretty resilient, good with kids, loyal, energetic but not boisterous etc). They're a really good 'first time dog' for kids and adults alike IME. Never met one who wasn't an absolute sweetheart.

I love CKCS but the health issues would put me off. If you can do the clipping or pay for grooming then a bichon has a very similar temperament. Maybe a Tibetan Terrier (they aren't actually terriers so prey drive isn't huge), grooming again (but no shedding, so swings and roundabouts) but they are a good "dog shaped dog" if that makes sense! Rescue greyhounds can have a huge prey drive with small fluffies and not all can ever be safe off the lead. Of course if you aren't envisaging that they could well make your ideal pet. Most of the gundog group also make good family dogs, but don't go for the working line unless you are willing to provide a lot of exercise and mental stimulation. The companion breeds (so King Charles Spaniels and bichons etc) do suffer more with separation anxiety, as being the companion is essentially their job, but careful training at the beginning can help avoid that in most cases.

@Devilshands so DH job is call centre support type stuff, so he has a 30 min break for lunch but has time between calls/web chats to fuss/play/quickly let them outside for the loo. We're only at the first stages of thinking about it so obviously haven't worked it all out yet (or even if it's the right decision) At the moment we're thinking that weekends and my 2 days off we could do long walks or a few short ones and the 3 days I'm also working the dog could get a short walk early in the morning then two medium walks maybe, like one in the afternoon and one in the evening/at night? Depending on its needs.

Thanks @Fivebyfive2 !

I think then that the other PP has given some good options! TT, rescue greyhound, Bichon are all good choices. Cavalier is really good with kids, but as flagged, does have health conditions. Separation anxiety is an issue (as PP flagged) in a lot of smaller breeds but you can work through that easily with the right training etc. Italian Greyhounds are also lovely - they're quite robust (in terms of personality) and have exceptionally long lives (13-15 years!)

I'd stay clear of retriever breeds/gun dogs as even between type i.e. Show Labs/Goldens, they can vary massively. There's a thread ATM and the difference between even Show Goldens of the same age is really fascinating!

@Devilshands yeah we've ruled out Labrador or golden retriever because as much as I think they're gorgeous dogs, they're obviously quite big and bouncy and maybe just a bit too high energy for us. My worst nightmare would be to get a dog and not cope /not be able to meet its needs because we didn't think things through properly.

I think we'll wait until our son is in school and then see next year, while doing some research into breeds, breeders, rescue centres etc in the meantime. In my heart I've got this image of adding a dog to the family, going for walks and classes, fussing on the sofa and our son growing up with it being his best friend. But obviously my head knows there's so much more to it so I'm trying to be sensible!

Oh please consider an older rescue dog. They have so much love to give, and are often slower and more calm. So many many rescue dogs need homes.

I think you’d be better with an older dog. My OH WFH and no way would he have been able to deal with a pup if his job wasn’t totally flexible. Now she’s an older puppy it’s fine but the first few months were drop everything at any time as pup needed the loo/chased the cat/stole something/just needed attention. He’d often catch up when I got home from work. Now she just chills out or plays herself when uses working but that didn’t happen until she was well over a year, even with a good routine in place.

We’ve had rescues and a pup and the first year is hard.

Consider how having a puppy could actually work. I worked from home full time with both of mine after an initial settling in period but my work is hugely flexible with very few meetings/calls etc. and I could largely dictate my own schedule, catch up out of hours etc. A puppy won't wait 5 minutes for your OH to finish a call to go to the loo, it will just piddle on the floor.

@soberfabulous We'd absolutely love an older rescue to be honest, just not sure if we'd be considered suitable because of having a younger child? We're going to talk to some rescue centres like dogs trust and greyhound rescue, maybe some breed specific rescue places too, just for some advice and go from there.

One thing to consider is dog barking while husband working. We work from home and luckily it doesn't really matter but if someone knocks on the door she will bark and bark until they've gone, really unprofessional if on the phone! You'd think it would be easy to train them to stop but we've tried everything, she's perfect in every other way.

What about a miniature poodle or a cairn terrier? Both lovely natured dogs, dont' require excessive amounts of exercise and are a nice size. They both need grooming though.

You sound like you want the same dog we want! We’re thinking of getting one in summer 2025. Planning on going to Crufts in March for the “discover dogs” bit.

Currently top of my research list are Tibetan terriers, Havanese, Miniature schnauzers, miniature poodles.

I’ve ruled out Cavaliers due to the health issues, and on the advice of a vet friend ruled out Italian Greyhounds as just being too delicate for a house with young children (she’s seen a lot of broken bones). We used to have a Lab who was gorgeous but really hard work for the first three years, and just want a smaller dog. Love cocker spaniels but know too many utterly bonkers ones. Quite fancy a Jack Russell, but they are so varied in personality I think I’d only get one if we knew the parents and breeder personally.

Puppies are REALLY hard work (there are threads on here which make that clear!) but I similarly have doubts over being able to adopt. I follow several local rescue centres - the very occasional dog they have that would suit us attracts ridiculous numbers of applications.

From experience, your husband will struggle to work from home and take calls with a dog under one. So you’ll need to be factoring in day care some days at least for the first few months.

You might want to look at beagles. Small, affectionate, good with kids.

AKC has a quiz to see what dog breed will probably fit you best based on what you want! As much as I love rescue dogs I (personally) wouldn’t have them with children. But honestly depends on the dog the shelter etc.